Talk:Touch the Sky Tour/GA1

GA Review

Passed. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:43, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: BennyOnTheLoose (talk · contribs) 13:57, 2 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:
· · ·

Copyvio Check

Some overlaps with sources that are passable due to WP:LIMITED, although "a light-colored shirt and pants, a suit jacket, and sunglasses with white frames" could perhaps be reworded. Other matches are attributed quotes, names of venues etc.

I reworded the sunglasses part if this is alright? --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Images

The Fantasia image isn't great, but we only have free or fair use materials to choose from, so it's OK.
There seem to be some images on Commons which, although they are in the category "Kanye West in 2009", are said to show his concert in Milan on 2 March 2006. Are any of these suitable to be added?

Not really, as no Italy concert(s) can be sourced as having happened. --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Background

"label Def Jam" - consider amending to "record label Def Jam". (Just to avoid any possible confusion with fashion labels etc.) Also, consider wikilinking to record label - I'm not sure how familiar the term is outside the UK and US, so it might help some readers.

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I note that consensus to include the Hong Kong show has been sought on the article's talk page, with no replies, so fine to include it.
"West extended the concert at London's Hammersmith Apollo from one night to three due to demand" - reword to show that three concerts, rather than one really long one, were planned.

Done if this works? --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Inspiration and development

[2][20][19] - ref. ordering.

Done, this must have become misordered when I was adding new info to the section using these refs. --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

"West displayed an instinct of bringing nature to the set," - decent approach at summarising the source, but a slightly clunky phrase. Can this be reworded?
"fake natural displays" - again, derives from source, but a bit jarring. Can "fake natural" be rephrased?

Done for the above --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

"designing all of his succeeding tours" - need to add a qualifier, along the lines of "as of 2022", to futureproof this statement.

Done, adding as of 2016. --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

"Retrospectively" seems redundant.

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Concert synopsis

Could wikilink string section

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Reception

I verified that the Rolling Stone comment appeared in the review. (Bearing in mind Renaissance_(Beyoncé_album)#Controversy_over_word_choice)

Set list

"respective set lists given below for West and Cole" - are these complete set lists, or just known performances from that show?

From the source, it appears that they are the set lists but I have reworded slightly. --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Shows

Infobox says the tour went on until April 22, 2006, but shows are only listed up to February 2006. (And there's are mentions in the text that a Milan show was cancelled and about Sydney shows). If there are no reliable source for the later show details, maybe add a note this is the case?

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Looks like there was also a show on December 31, 2005. (see Getty Images). A look at setlist.fm, although not a reliable source, suggests that there were also shows on December 14-17 and 19, 2005. Again, if there aren't good sources, maybe make it clearer that the list is incomplete?

Not done this is only that show and a few others, so it does not have a large effect on what is listed. --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Notes

Add source for note (c)

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Note (e), re: the Hong Kong show is not referenced, but I think this is fine as it simply states information that can be seen from the table.

Sources

I wasn't sure about Hypebeast as a source, but consensus is that it's reliable. (RSN)
There are some conflicting views about HipHopDX at the reliable sources noticeboard (Wikipedia:Reliable_sources/Noticeboard/Archive_33#HipHopDX, Wikipedia:Reliable_sources/Noticeboard/Archive_66#HipHopDX). I think it's fine to use here for the information supported, particularly as there's an overlap with the MTV source.
Could add agency as Australian Associated Press for the The Age March 10, 2006 source

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Spot checks on "Common Drops Off Kanye's Touch The Sky Tour Just Hours Before Kickoff". MTV.; "Kanye keeps dates for solo shows", The Age March 10, 2006; "Two shot at Kanye West gig". The Guardian; "Kanye West takes show to the Ford Center". The Oklahoman; "2 shot at Kanye West concert". Los Angeles Times. March 2, 2006. No issues with verification.

Infobox and lead

Page/article description could be added.

There is already a short description template at the top; isn't this valid? --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Looks like this was added by Felida97 after I'd looked at the article. BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:40, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

"The rapper saw his fans as motivation for the tour" - maybe should be slightly qualified, e.g. "The rapper said he saw his fans as motivation for the tour" as essentially this is based on his own statements. (Not all performers would admit We're Only in It for the Money)

Done --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Kyle Peake: The article is close to GA - probably the main point is clarifying tour dates or being clearer that the list is incomplete. Happy to discuss, or be challenged on, any of my review comments. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 16:01, 2 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

BennyOnTheLoose Thanks for the review and I have gone over everything above; tell me if I still need to fix anything! --K. Peake 08:12, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

@Kyle Peake: Looks fine for GA, thanks. There was some coverage of his March shows in Australia in the Australian press, but the only way I can access this is through NewsBank - if you can get access to that through a library there might be a bit more to add in future, but at the moment I'm only assessing against the GA criteria. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 08:40, 3 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.