Talk:The Worship Project
The Worship Project has been listed as one of the Music good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it. Review: April 8, 2016. (Reviewed version). |
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A fact from The Worship Project appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 20 November 2011 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:The Worship Project/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Mymis (talk · contribs) 18:25, 3 April 2016 (UTC)
Comments by Mymis
[edit]Hello, I do wish to review your article. Please note that this is my first time reviewing an article, you are welcome to disagree with my comments. Mymis (talk) 18:25, 3 April 2016 (UTC)
General
[edit]- All the figure dashes (-) must be replaced with en dashes (–), per MOS:DASH.
Introduction
[edit]- "organs and violins" → I would suggest linking the instruments.
- "selling over 60,000 copies" → In the US or worldwide? The Release section says they sold it within a year, I think it should be included in the intro as well.
- The sources do not say; done.Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "In writing songs for the album, MercyMe used a basic" → A bit odd sentence structure, maybe just "MercyMe wrote songs for the album using a basic.."
- It seems that these three long sentences about what kind of albums the band released afterwards are a bit off-topic and not very important mentioning, especially in the introduction, in my opinion. Maybe just merge it in one short sentence, like: "The band further released one independant album before making a decision to sign with a major record label."
- Done. How does it look now? Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- I think it's important to mention the success of "I Can Only Imagine", especially that it was certified double platinum.
Background and composition
[edit]- "..released four independent records, Christian alternative rock albums that drew.." → doesn't sound like a grammaticaly correct sentece, maybe ".. records that were all Christian alternative rock albums influenced by grunge music"
- Changed to "Prior to the release of The Worship Project, MercyMe had independently released four Christian alternative rock albums, drawing influence from the grunge style popular at the time." Is that good? Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "While playing live, however, the ba.." → I think you missed a word in this sentence, doesn't sound right. I'd suggest starting a new sentence after a word "audiences". Like, "In contrast, their covers of popular worship songs received a greater reception during their live performances, which lead the band to write and produce..."
- "written by Millard and composed by" → mmm, not very clear what is "written" and "composed"? you meant "write lyrics" and compose music"?
- Changed to "With the exception of "Beautiful", a song Cochran wrote the lyrics and music to, the lyrics on the album were written by Millard, while the music was composed by the entire band". Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "because it meant so much to Millard" → sounds informal
- Changed to 'was important to Millard'. Is that good? Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "The Pig Sty" → is it a recording studio?
- I assume - the liner notes say that is where it was recorded and give the location, but I couldn't find anything about it other than that, so I can't say for sure. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "worship" → is already linked once in the section
- Delinked. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "Hammond-style organs" → link "organs"
Release, reception, and impact
[edit]- You used "released" twice in the first two sentences, maybe replace the second one with "issued"
- Great idea! Done. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "the internet" → the Internet is always capitalized
- "did appear on any" → you missed a word "not"
- About the sales, again, you should mention where it was sold. Also, the source for the estimated toal sales is from ten years ago, you should then add "as of 2006".
- Same answer as above - sources don't say. The other is Fixed.
- "topping the Christian radio charts" → in the USA or worldwide?
- US; fixed. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "certified 2× platinum" → "double-platinum"
- "over 2 digital copies" → only 2 copies? :)
- Lol, fixed. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
Personnel
[edit]- is "lifted" a right word? maybe just omit it
- no need linking "MercyMe"
Track listing
[edit]- "Credits" → "Credits and tracklist from.."
References
[edit]- Chicago Sun-Times → Chicago Sun-Times
- The sources look very good, just don't forget fixing the dashes.
- Those should be fixed now. Toa Nidhiki05 00:52, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
Further fixes
[edit]- "which Cochran wrote the lyrics and music to" → the preposition at the end does not sound very nice, maybe, "which was solely written by Cochran"?
- The paragraph starting with "The Worship Project has been described as being a" → you use word "described" four times, sounds a bit repetitive. maybe replace the third one with "consider": "Mark Allan Powell considered "Happy Little Love Song" being a" or something like that.
- Good idea; fixed. Toa Nidhiki05 16:15, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- "The stress of selling the album directly" → maybe "the difficulty"?
- About.com → About.com
- Fixed. Just noticed that citation was duplicated so removed the duplicate. Toa Nidhiki05 16:15, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
- The New York Times Company does not own About.com, no need mentioning it
The article looks way better now, would be more than happy to promote it once you adress these remaining minor issues. Mymis (talk) 15:18, 4 April 2016 (UTC)
I believe you fixed all the listed problems. It is a well-written article with no original research or any copyvio detected. The sources are all reliable well formatted. I am happy to promote it. Good job! Mymis (talk) 18:15, 8 April 2016 (UTC)
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