Talk:The Trouble with Tribbles/GA1
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Reviewer: Ed! (talk · contribs) 01:57, 14 May 2013 (UTC)
- "On arrival, Captain James T. Kirk (William Shatner) becomes furious..." -- Why was he so mad about the call? Also, why did Baris want someone to guard the grain?
- Copyedited to make it clear it was because he was being asked to guard some grain. Funnily enough, Baris never explained his original concerns as at the time there wasn't any Klingons on the station yet. Miyagawa (talk) 18:56, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- Repetition: "arrives on the station with some tribbles onto the station."
- Fixed. Miyagawa (talk) 18:56, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "Koloth demands an apology from Kirk after some of the Enterprise crew were provoked into a brawl with the Klingons in the station's bar." -- Is this the last you see of Koloth? It sort of leaves you hanging and wondering about why he was in the episode in the first place.
- I've swapped around two sentences to move that last mention of Koloth to the final plot paragraph. The entire last paragraph was wrapped up in only a couple of scenes, and Koloth was present when Darvin was revealed as a Klingon agent. Miyagawa (talk) 18:56, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "He worked on "I, Mudd" before "The Trouble with Tribbles" began to film." -- Which "he" do you mean? The preceding sentence talks about two people.
- Changed to Gerrold. Miyagawa (talk) 18:56, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "The use of live animals..." -- Was there originally a live animal in mind that would resemble a Tribble?
- Gerrold didn't have a design in mind when he originally put together the script, and Holly Sherman's fluffy keychain was the first idea for what they could be. Miyagawa (talk) 18:59, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "relatively few original tribbles exist as the fur fell out over time and they went bald" -- You mean relatively few exist today. Any telling where they are?
- Edited to say it was as of 2010. No idea how to tell the originals, but one was sold as part of an official prop auction back in 2003 for $1000, which I've added to the article. Miyagawa (talk) 19:09, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "he recalled that there was some resistance at the time against making a comedy-style episode." -- Might be helpful to note here that comedic episodes were generally the exception.
- Found a cite to make the point with and added it to the article. Miyagawa (talk) 22:06, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- I think the rest of the cast in the infobox who were guests should appear in the "casting" section
- I've added lines regarding the relevant ones. Although the remainder were listed as guests in the source and therefore are in the infobox, I haven't been able to find anything relevant to add to the article about them. Miyagawa (talk) 18:41, 16 May 2013 (UTC)
- "Gerrold suggested that an acknowledgement of the creator of the tribbles might be in order and asked if he could be an extra." -- Which extra was he? And was he paid?
- Found an image of him on Memory Alpha in the role - however, I couldn't find a specific source for it so sourced it back to the episode itself instead. Miyagawa (talk) 20:31, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- "Whilst on a visit to the set, Gerrold was told by Abrams that the tribble had been deliberatly "snuck in"." -- In which scene was the Tribble?
- Managed to find a cite from MTV News for that, and added it to the article. Miyagawa (talk) 18:56, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- You mention some of the cast, staff, and media reviews of the show, but this one was very popular with the general audience. It's glossed over a little, but I think it is important to expand on the fact that star trek was a niche audience and it was unusual for an episode to stand out like this. It should also be noted that the episode didn't save the series from being cancelled.
- I think I've got this done now, I've moved it down into the reception section. Miyagawa (talk) 22:34, 15 May 2013 (UTC)
- One duplicate link, but external links all appear to be working and there are no disambiguation links. All images appear to be properly licensed and I don't see any problems with stability or neutrality.
- I managed to add some more duplicates with my recent edits, but I just went through and removed them. Miyagawa (talk) 18:41, 16 May 2013 (UTC)
- All in all this is a great article, definitely worth GA status after these fixes. I'd suggest taking it higher than GA when you're done too. —Ed!(talk) 02:50, 14 May 2013 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review, I rather enjoyed the work on this episode, and it certainly is one I'd like to take up to FA in the future. I only wish I was lucky enough to have specific source material for every episode. :) Miyagawa (talk) 18:41, 16 May 2013 (UTC)
Good work! Passing the GA now. —Ed!(talk) 03:27, 18 May 2013 (UTC)