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Talk:The Secret of the Nagas/GA1

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Reviewer: Redtigerxyz (talk · contribs) 11:50, 31 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Rate Attribute Review Comment
1. Well-written:
1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.
  • The plot is very confusing and does not describe how the characters are related.
1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.
2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose). * Why is http://www.mbauniverse.com/article.php?id=3181 reliable? It is not published by the IIM. Removal is fine, if other reference exists.
2c. it contains no original research. * The reference [1] says "I was interested in writing on philosophy but my family told me it didn't pay. So, it was

finance that I followed", but is used to reference: "Tripathi had initially decided to write a book on the philosophy of evil, but was dissuaded by his family members, so he decided to write a book on Shiva, one of the Hindu gods." along with the IMO unreliable [2], which supports this line.

3. Broad in its coverage:
3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.
  • A section on "Characters". It is unclear how the characters are related or who they are. Create something similar as in Ramayan 3392 A.D..
  • No need to include minor characters (you will the best person to decide who is minor) in the "Characters", but include a short description as in "Bhagirath and Anandamayi, the prince and princess of Ayodhya."


3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
  • "Development and release" is filled with promotional quotes of the author: "Get ready for the ride", "Mysteries hidden ... and much more." and other promotional adjectives "cliffhanging plot"
5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.


6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.
7. Overall assessment.
You may have to wait a little because Legolas notified me a few weeks ago that he will be gone for some weeks. Please remain patient, thanks! —WP:PENGUIN · [ TALK ] 17:56, 31 October 2011 (UTC)[reply]
This article is tending towards a fail and needs major work. I will wait for next Tuesday anyway since I have already put it on hold. --Redtigerxyz Talk 14:44, 1 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Hold it Redtiger. I'm back. I just ask a little more time. Lemme go through your points and lemme make the changes. — Legolas (talk2me) 09:59, 7 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]
The hold period is extended till Sunday (7 days). --Redtigerxyz Talk 16:55, 8 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Hi Redtiger, I have addressed all your comments. Please see if they are satisfactorily. And thanks for the extension. — Legolas (talk2me) 16:05, 12 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Few more things:

  • Unlike other works inspired by mythology like Hercules (1997 film) where deities depicted retain their classical traits and are immortal gods, here the characters like Shiva are not gods. Shiva is not the Destroyer, the Supreme God of Shaiva Hinduism, but a a Tibetan mortal. [3] says that the characters are namesakes of the Hindu epic characters and deities and are inspired by incidents from Hindu mythology, however the author believes that he is presenting gods. Present both POVs at the start of Characters section.
  • Link the characters only in the "Characters". No need in Plot, as there was not the same characters of Hindu mythology and a non-Hindu/non_Indian reader may be confused, trying to map the traits of Novel characters to the epic characters
  • Add references to Characters section. This might help.
  • Characters:
    • Sati says "Shiva falls in love with her but cannot marry", but fails to say that they are married now.
    • Is it Bhadra or Veer Bhadra? [4]
      • Initially he was known as Bhadra, but from the middle of the first book it was changed to Veer Bhadra.
  • It might also help to write about the fictional world (3 kingdoms) in Characters section [5]. Rename to "Characters and locations" or alike. Also, have 3 lists: Characters, Races (do not mix with Characters), kingdoms/locations
  • The linking of Naga to Naga_people_(Sri_Lanka) is also OR, it can well mean Nāga or Naga (clan).
  • The linking of Vikarma to Karma (Hinduism) is also abstract. Vikarma means "sinful/forbidden activities". The link will confuse readers. Do not add links that mean something else in the Mehula world and the real world. Also, the Hindu Shiva is never described as an "untouchable" - Dalit.
  • Link of Branga as Bengal is OR.
    • A little in doubt here. The story specifically refers to Bengal, and so does most of the reviews, including a reference to Bengali singer Bappi Lahiri. What do you think?

--Redtigerxyz Talk 06:00, 13 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

See if its fine now. I'm really enjoying the points that you are making. — Legolas (talk2me) 13:34, 13 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

All issues are resolved. GA PASS. Well done. --Redtigerxyz Talk 17:33, 13 November 2011 (UTC)[reply]

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