Talk:The Same Old Blood Rush with a New Touch/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Kees08 (talk · contribs) 04:30, 4 January 2017 (UTC)

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.	From: 10- year anniversary tour." To: ten-year anniversary tour." (I think..) "..while at the same time fending off advances from record labels" - This sounds awkward, can you rework it? "These demos soon garnered attention." - from whom? Reword these sentences, they are short and choppy: " Several demos were re-recorded during the album sessions. In March, "The Curse of Curves" was made available for streaming. Following its release the band went on a couple of tours in the U.S." "The group met with Janick and then left to record demos in New York City." - left from where, to record demos with who? Did Janick come with..? "About working with Squire, Hacikyan described him as..." - reword the beginning of this, sounds awkward. From: "As such, the band and Squire spent a "lot of time" working on preproduction." To: "As such, the band and Squire spent a "lot of time" working on pre-production." (add the dash throughout) "From mid -February to mid -March, the band went on a headlining U.S. tour with support from This Providence and All Time Low." - no space between the dashes and the words, right? (same comment next paragraph) From: Despite mentioning the group can be "more insightful," Jack said they "usually lack depth in their typical commentary on “scenes” and “cliques” and being a 'sell out'." To: Despite mentioning the group can be "more insightful," Jack said they "usually lack depth in their typical commentary on 'scenes' and 'cliques' and being a 'sell out'."
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	"Hacikyan explained" - Explained is on the list of "words to watch" as a synonym for said. "Guitarist Jeff Czum explained" - Same comment "Guitarist Jeff Czum said: "Literally overnight we got like 10,000 fans on Myspace and started to get attention from labels." - I think this is a little excessive for the lead. Probably add that they released the vinyl copy in the lead section.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).
	2c. it contains no original research.
	2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism.	Copyvio tool reports high copyvio %, however that is only due to quotes, the band name, and song names.
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.	Let's add some reviews on the vinyl copy as well: http://modern-vinyl.com/2015/01/08/reissue-review-cute-is-what-we-aim-for-the-same-old-blood-rush-with-a-new-touch/ - not doing per comment below
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).	I have no idea what Enjoy the Ride is: "In December 2014, the album was released on vinyl for the first time through Enjoy the Ride." "Eventually, they performed the album at cities across the U.S. in October." - This seems shallow, maybe include how many cities, or say 'including (insert significant cities here), or say how many fans they played to?
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.
	7. Overall assessment.

AFAIK Modern Vinyl is a self-published source (their podcast is published by Jabber Jaw Media but the website seems to be self-published). Yeepsi (talk) 15:37, 5 January 2017 (UTC)

I think I addressed all the points before you put the review on hold. Yeepsi (talk) 00:40, 8 January 2017 (UTC)