Talk:The One with the Embryos/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Gen. Quon (talk · contribs) 16:01, 3 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Issues:

Generally, footnotes aren't need in the intro. I'd move [1] to the infobox or reception and [2] to the reception section as well

Done

Intro: "agrees to host in her uterus the artificially inseminated embryos" Maybe it's just me, but this sentence sounds kinda funny. Maybe mention something about being a surrogate mother

Done

Plot: "who knows more about whom" I would put a ':' after 'whom' instead of a comma

Done

Plot: Change 'favourite' to 'favorite' since Friends is an American sitcom, the spelling should follow American guidelines

Done

Plot: "As the four pack up their respective apartments; Rachel in particular displeased about having to switch" You should only use a semicolon when there are two independent clauses. The first clause is a fragment, so maybe rephrase to "As the four pack up their respective apartments—Rachel in particular displeased about having to switch—"

Done

Production: Maybe spice this up with a fun free image. Maybe add this picture of Lisa Kudrow and mention how her actual pregnancy inspired the episode?

Done

Production: Cite who directed/wrote the episode (A episode cite would be lovely)

Done

Production: "It was the same with Debra Jo Rupp, who was..." Change this to "A similar situation occurred with Debra Jo Rupp, who was..."

Done

Production: "The animals were originally intended for one episode but the producers believed as they got "so much mileage out of them", it made a recurring appearance." Change to "The animals were originally intended for one episode but because the producers believed they got "so much mileage out of them", they made recurring appearances."

Done

Reception: The tenses change: ""The One with the Embryos" is Courteney Cox and Matt LeBlanc's favorite episode of the series," "Cox likes the episode," "LeBlanc spoke fondly of the pace" I would recommend changing all the tenses to past, as the action has already happened

Done

Reception: "Thanks to the trivia contest alone, Embryos is quite possibly Friends' finest moment" Un-italicize "Embryos," since its the name of an episode

Done

Reception: Change "It singles out..." to "The article singles out..." Sounds a little nicer, IMHO

Done

Not sure, isn't '17 October 1997' and '21 January 1998' the published dates? -- Lemonade51 (talk) 11:02, 6 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

That's all. Nice article; fun to read. On hold for seven days.--Gen. Quon (talk) 21:32, 5 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Oh, yeah sorry about the reference goof. Everything looks wonderful! I pass!--Gen. Quon (talk) 16:03, 6 April 2012 (UTC)[reply]