Talk:The Inca of Perusalem
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Intro 'graph
[edit]I found
- In a prologue a character called Ermyntrude says that though she is the widow of a millionaire, she is now poor, living on a small income from her father, the Archdeacon, who has told her to take a job as a lady's maid so that she can meet another millionaire and marry back into money.
and I regard it as the kind of writing that GBS would have torn to shreds, if only for its author having lacked the imagination to have wondered at least what would happen if some comma or "and" were replaced by a semicolon. I shall start with such an experiment, and hope to produce at least less gymnastic syntax, even if not more grammatical. (Finding the most plausible place for that, and seeing if it clarifies our colleague's intent or not strikes me as likely to be less laborious than trying to fathom by other means why a writer with, I think, impeccable English spelling, would go so far astray as to comprehension-prone syntax.
- In a prologue, a character called Ermyntrude says that (though she is the widow of a millionaire) she is now poor, and living on a small income from her father. He is the Archdeacon; he has told her to take a job as a lady's maid, meet another millionaire, and marry back "into money".
Well, forgive my coarseness, but ... oh, why bother being gratuitously annoying? ... I found that exercise well worthwhile, even if serves only to goad a colleague to do better.
--Jerzy•t 12:53, 11 February 2019 (UTC)
In a prologue, a character called Ermyntrude says that (though she is the widow of a millionaire) she is now poor, and living on a small income from her father. He is the Archdeacon; he has told her to take a job as a lady's maid, meet another millionaire, and marry back into money. Jerzy•t 12:59, 11 February 2019 (UTC)