Talk:The Fame Monster/GA2

GA Review

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Reviewer: Kees08 (talk · contribs) 19:50, 22 January 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Rate	Attribute	Review Comment
1. Well-written:
	1a. the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct.	From: The decision was also due to Gaga believing the re-release too expensive and that the albums were conceptually different, describing them as yin and yang. To: The decision was also due to Gaga believing the re-release was too expensive and that the albums were conceptually different, describing them as yin and yang. Rewrite this: The cover artwork was done by Hedi Slimane and has a Gothic theme, due to which they were originally declined by her record company; Gaga later convinced them for using the images. Rewrite this: The set begins with the track "Bad Romance", which Simon Price from The Independent felt that it set the tone for the album. From: The album also received nominations in other music awards. To: The album also received nominations for other music awards. Rephrase and get rid of the the: The Fame Monster topped the Dance/Electronic Albums chart, replacing the The Fame from the top, and was Gaga's second number one album on the chart. Sold this many copies by what date? - It has sold 548,000 copies in Japan and ranked at number 14 on the year end list Rewrite this: Gaga was inspired to write the track by her father's heart condition, and the fear she had about his death while the singer was touring. Keep periods inside of quotation marks such as ." and not ". Do the same with commas. Is this the right verb? ...she would prefer to emote in the... Rewrite this sentence: The last song, "Teeth", contains gospel music and the lyrics are written in S&M style, telling that the closest she will get to another human being involves being tied up and bitten. Rewrite this: Interscope originally hoped to only put out a double-disc deluxe re-release of The Fame, but such was not financially feasible. Something is missing from this sentence: It included the explicit version of , as well as nine remixes, eight music videos, a digital booklet, single covers, and a photo gallery. Pretty sure this does not need the period since the question mark precedes it: and Germany's Wetten, dass..?. Rewrite this: Same day she performed "Bad Romance" on an episode of CW's Gossip Girl, in an episode titled "The Last Days of Disco Stick". Rewrite: Same month, she was present at the 2010 BRIT Awards, and in memory of designer Alexander McQueen, Gaga crooned a ballad version of "Telephone" and then "Dance in the Dark". Change to: "Alejandro" reached the top five on the Australian and Canadian charts, as well as in the top ten of the charts of other nations. Change to: Described by Gaga as "the first-ever pop electro opera", The Monster Ball Tour had dates starting ~~from~~ November 2009 and finishing in early May 2011. Reword this: Each segment featured Gaga in a new dress and was followed by a video interlude, and Gaga in Gothic and artsy poses, to the next one. Reword: HBO filmed a special of tour during Gaga's February 2011 shows at Madison Square Garden in New York City. The song is called So Happy I Could Die - "So Happy" also uses Auto-Tune in its music.
	1b. it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.	Shouldn't this paragraph be in the critical reception and commercial performance sections? - In 2012, Complex listed it at rank six on their countdown of The 50 Best Pop Album Covers of the Past Five Years. Dale Eisenger from the publication called both covers as "alluring and gorgeous", adding that Gaga's look was followed by a number of artists emulating it in later years.[26] In 2015, Billboard included the standard album cover on their list of the "50 Greatest Album Covers of All Time".[27]Andrew Unterberger from the publication wrote in a 2016 article that the cover arts were "much starker and more angular than the party-diva framing of [The Fame]. It's still very sleek, but there's a danger in Gaga's eyes this time out, and the feeling of greater depth in its austerity: A star, but one with a lot to say."[28] Consistently place the citations in the same column for the Certifications table.
2. Verifiable with no original research:
	2a. it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline.	The first citation's page number does not verify any of the information it is supposed to, it is to the paper's bibliography.
	2b. reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose).
	2c. it contains no original research.	The citations do not say anything about this: ...thus becoming one of the best-selling singles of all time.
	2d. it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism.	This needs quotation marks, it is very closely phrased to what was in the article - "It has a dominant atmosphere and a Gothic aesthetic, from the monochrome cover artwork of the single version to the crucifix logo." The next sentence isn't much better.
3. Broad in its coverage:
	3a. it addresses the main aspects of the topic.
	3b. it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
	4. Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
	5. Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
6. Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
	6a. media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content.	The description on File:The_Fame_Monster.jpg is very peculiar. What is the problem with the description? You need to point out specifically. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 06:05, 2 February 2017 (UTC)[reply] File:Hedi Slimane.jpg could use a better description Again, please suggest since the caption is what all he did related to the album. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 06:05, 2 February 2017 (UTC)[reply] File:The_Monster_Ball_-_LoveGame_revamped3.jpg flickr link is not working for me. Its working for me fine. And please remember that even if the original author deleted that image, he/she released it under the said license when the FlickrReview was done. Refer to Creative commons. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 06:05, 2 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]
	6b. media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.	This caption does not match the image: Gaga's touring experiences would shape The Fame Monster's early musical direction. Well Gaga is performing on The Fame Ball Tour, where she started developing this record. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 06:05, 2 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]
	7. Overall assessment.	On hold for now, I may have additional comments but this should be more than enough to get started on. I am going to fail this for now, it has been a bit of time. Don't take it personally or anything, I just don't like to keep reviews open for a really long period of time. I highly, highly recommend nominating it for the GOCE to work on, I think there are a lot of issues with prose. Let me know when you renominate it, I might take it on again.

Sorry for the delay just give me 2 more days. Wrapping up some editing work and travelling also, sorry again. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 05:03, 14 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

That's fine, thanks for the update, I am in no rush. When you go in to edit it, just note that I think in general it needs an extensive copy edit. After we work through all these points I'll go through it again. The Muppets article on the other hand is very close in my opinion, in case you want to do that one first. Kees08 (talk) 05:38, 14 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Both articles by these weekend I promise. Thanks for your patience. —IB ^{[ Poke ]} 05:19, 23 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

For sure, sounds good. Kees08 (talk) 05:34, 23 February 2017 (UTC)[reply]

@IndianBio:Let me know if you need anything else from me, we'll get this. As a side note, I took a look at the Lady Gaga WikiProject and it was pretty cool to see how passionate you all were. Happy editing! Kees08 (talk) 21:49, 5 March 2017 (UTC)[reply]