Talk:The Art of Losing (American Hi-Fi album)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 12:52, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

I will review this later on for the GAN backlog drive! --K. Peake 12:52, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

Are you sure there isn't inappropriate spacing before the parameters per Template:Infobox album?

This was done by a WP:GOCE user in this edit. I didn't change it back since it didn't break the infobox. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

The recording date is not sourced; it is only stated in the body they started in March and aimed for completion in April

Changed to 2002 as I couldn't find an end/final recording month. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Yeepsi Just remove the recording date then, as it is not sourced that recording finished that year (remember, the album came out in 2003). --K. Peake 18:53, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Removed. Yeepsi (talk) 18:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Target Pop punk to Pop-punk
"their eponymous debut album (2001)," → "their eponymous debut studio album (2001),"
"also in Hollywood." → "in Hollywood of the state." because Burbank is not in the same location as Hollywood
"The album has been described" → "It has been described"
Target pop punk to Pop-punk
"power pop and" → "power pop, and"
"and drew comparisons" → "while received comparisons"
Critical should be mentioned before commercial reception; change to saying "while reaching number 80..." at the end of the sentence
"The album's title track was released to radio" → "Its title track was released to radio as the lead single" with the wikilink
Mention that it was the US Alternative Airplay chart
Wikilink music videos

Background and production

"in February 2001[1] and promoted it" → "in February 2001, and promoted the album" plus [1] should be at the end of the sentence instead before [3] since it backs up the release date and the song being the lead single
Regarding the recording of the album, the source itself mentions them aiming to complete by April like you have wrote here; however, can you find anywhere the date recording was actually finished so dates can be added?

I couldn't find an end/final recording month in any of the sources. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

"and from Errin Familia at" → "and it was also provided by Errin Familia at" to avoid confusion
Wikilink Portland, Maine
"The album cost around $200,000 to make; when the band's label" → "It cost around $200,000 to make; when American Hi-Fi's record label" with the wikilink

Composition

Retitle to Music and lyrics
"to its final title." → "to the final title." but are you sure this doesn't belong in background or release?
Target pop punk to Pop-punk
"power pop and rock, and has been compared" → "power pop, and rock, while it was compared"
"The opening title-track evokes" → "The opening title track evokes" with the target
"being told what to do." → "being told what to do by others." to be specific
"of the band's song" → "of American Hi-Fi's song"
"trying to retrieve his" → "placing more focus on retrieving his"
"recall the works of" → "recalls the works of"
"and cribs the work of" → "as well as cribbing the work of"
[15][13] should be put in numerical order
"recall the music of" → "recalls the music of"
Are you sure "channels" is the correct term for this section or should you paraphrase, as I'm not too sure if it's encyclopedic?
Target sampled to Sampling (music)

Release

Retitle to Release and promotion
Wikilink music video
"over three days and" → "over a period of three days and"
"The video shows the band" → "It shows American Hi-Fi"
"some fans approaching" → "some fans previously approaching"
Mention that it was released to US radio stations
"as the album's lead single" → "as the lead single from The Art of Losing" with the wikilink
Target digital downloads to Music download
Target CD to Compact disc
"and addition to" → "in addition to"
"titled "Self Control" that" → "entitled "Self Control" that"
"both from the group's debut album" → "both from American Hi-Fi"
"bonus tracks while" → "bonus tracks, while" with the wikilink per MOS:LINK2SECT
"It was promoted with" → "The former was promoted with"
"club tour throughout February," → "club tour throughout February 2009,"
Mention that the performance was the following month
"In April and May that year, the group" → "In April and May of that year, American Hi-Fi"
"east coast tour[24] but the tour" → "east coast tour,[24] but the tour"
"due to family issues." → "due to the lead act's family issues."
Mention that the music videos were released in October 2009

Reception

IGN should not be italicised

Ah, I was thrown off by the IGN article having its title in italics. Yeepsi (talk) 18:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Italicise Melodic, Rock Hard, Rolling Stone, and Spin
"E! Online opened" → "The staff of E! Online opened"
"the listener was in" → "the listener enters"
"metal-friendly ... that" → "metal-friendly [...] that"
Wikilink Bay City Rollers
IGN should not be italicised
"said lyricism was "not [the band's]" → "said lyricism is "not [American Hi-Fi's]"
"Rock Hard said" → "The staff of Rock Hard said"
""evoke[d] little emotions in me. They" → ""evoke[s] little emotions", writing: "They"
"be annoying ..." → "be annoying [...]"
"wrote the band" → "wrote American Hi-Fi"
"though with Jones" → "though the inclusion of Jones"
Wikilink alternative rock
"and that the group had lost" → "and noted American Hi-Fi as having lost"
"personal style," sounding" → "personal style", sounding"
"the US Billboard 200.[32] The title track reached number 33 on the" → "the US Billboard 200,[32] while the title track reached number 33 on the US"
Invoke the Billboard 200 from the chart table by using a refname in place of [32]
""best-of pop punk album" list." → ""best-of pop punk albums" lists."

Track listing

See MOS:TABLECAPTION

Personnel

Target Lars Fox to Grotus

Charts

Good

References

Copyvio score looks pretty good at 24.8%!
Top job with the archiving of all these where possible!
Wikilink Island Records on ref 5
Cite IGN as publisher instead for ref 8
Remove or replace ref 10 per WP:RSSM
Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 14
Cite FMQB as work/website instead for ref 17
Wikilink The Island Def Jam Music Group on ref 19
Ref 32 is a duplicate of ref 35; see my earlier comment for instructions on how to fix this
Target Schirmer Trade Books to Wise Music Group on that source

Final comments and verdict

On hold until all of the issues are fixed, but do not feel afraid to reach out if you have any queries! --K. Peake 17:30, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Whoops, sorry, I've done all the changes. Yeepsi (talk) 21:51, 7 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Yeepsi ✓ Pass now, there were a few further issues that had arisen after my comments being made but I copyedited the fixes in! --K. Peake 06:38, 8 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]