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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


GA Review

[edit]
GA toolbox
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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 18:03, 28 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Article looks well researched on first glance, will review properly soon though. --K. Peake 18:03, 28 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

[edit]
  • Are you sure the CD single belongs in the infobox since it was only a release in Japan? If so, move it after the other two more notable formats.
Moved format. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Recording date is unsourced anywhere in the body
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I'm not sure which part needs to be removed. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Remove the wikilink under Songwriter(s) --K. Peake 16:23, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 16:42, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "is a song that was recorded by American singer Ava Max" → "is a song by American singer Ava Max."
Reworded sentence — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "was released on" → "The song was released on" plus this sentence should be after the writing/production one
Moved sentence after writing and production. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "as the first single from her" → "as the lead single from Max's" with the appropriate wikilink
I am a bit hesitant on changing it to lead single, considering the MTV News article states that "Kings & Queens" would be the lead single, while "Sweet but Psycho" would still be included on the tracklist.
Keep as first single then as I did not know this; target single to Single (music) though
Added wikilink. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 16:42, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The song was co-written by" → "It was written by"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • ""Sweet but Psycho", a" → "It is a"
Reworded grammar. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "is about a woman" → "with lyrics about a woman"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "was inspired by Max's parents" → "was inspired by an incident with Max and her parents"
Changed sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • ""Sweet but Psycho"'s lyrics and" → "The song's lyrics and"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I feel like it may be an WP:OVERLINK in accordance to the phrasing that Everyday words understood by most readers in context are not usually linked. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I have seen that before, but music video is commonly linked and isn't an everyday word like "grass" for example --K. Peake 16:23, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 16:42, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "of mental illnesses such as" → "of mental illnesses like"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add for the following sentence of the lead: "The song received mixed to positive reviews from music critics" with the target and mentioning what was praised
Added sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the United Kingdom, where it stayed at number one for four consecutive weeks." → "the United Kingdom." since that is not notable for the lead
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "was Max's first top 10" → "was Max's first top 10 single"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "where it peaked at number 10" → "peaking at number 10"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • ""Sweet but Psycho" was the highest-selling" → "It was the highest-selling"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The song's music video was directed" → "An accompanying music video was directed"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and as a medley" → "and as part of a medley"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:34, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Background and development

[edit]
  • "Ava Max first met Canadian record producer" → "Max first met Canadian record producer"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Shouldn't the Vulture ref be cited at the end of this sentence?
Moved source to end of next sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [4] should come after [1][2] at the end of the sentence
Moved source to end of sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "her through email, she signed" → "her via email, with Max ultimately signing"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded sentence; kept "first single" phrase due to Lead and Infobox section question. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
That's fine but target single to Single (music) --K. Peake 16:23, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 16:43, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It was co-written by Max," → "The song was written by Max,"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "her parents told her" → "her parents said that"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "she discussed the song's message," → "Max discussed the message of the song,"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "those sides"; Max also said" → "those sides". Max continued, saying"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:51, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Composition

[edit]
  • Retitle to Composition and lyrics
Renamed section — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "published by Hal Leonard LLC and Musicnotes.com," → "published on Musicnotes.com,"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded sentence — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "beats per minute (BPM), and it is played" → "beats per minute, while composed"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "from the low note" → "from the low note of"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [13] should be at the end of the previous sentence and at the end of the current one before [14] instead of after the comma
Moved source to end of sentence before [14] due to WP:REPCITEAngryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Targeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "these hooks overlap" → "the hooks overlap"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "'psycho/right though', 'm-m-m-m-mine', and 'run, don’t walk away'." → ""psycho/right though", "m-m-m-m-mine", and "run, don’t walk away"."
Added double quotations. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "used in production." → "used in the production."
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "with hand-claps[11] while the" → "with hand-claps, and the" with the target and place [11] before [15][17] at the end of the sentence
Reworded sentence, moved citation to the end of the sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "second in the verse, and the first half during" → "coming second in the verse, and the first half of"
Reworded sentence — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Removed word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The lyrics describe the perception" → "The lyrics of the track describe the perception"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [11] should be at the end of the sentence before [19] instead
Moved source at the end of sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "in the chorus lyrics" → "in the chorus' lyrics,"
Fixed grammar — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Several remixes of "Sweet but Psycho" by" → "Remixes of "Sweet but Psycho" by"
Removed word — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and lead with a thick" → "and lead, with a thick"
Added comma — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "uplifting remix, which has" → "uplifting remix that includes"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Wikilink synthesizer to itself
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Critical reception

[edit]
  • "received mixed to positive reviews from music critics." → "was met with mixed to positive reviews from music critics."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [9] should solely be at the end of the sentence before [17]
Moved source to end of sentence
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and said it would fit" → "and said the song would fit"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Vulture should be italicised and targeted to Vulture.com
Italicized and retargeted. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "that in contrast to" → "and opined that in contrast to"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Weren't there any other mixed/negative reviews of the song?
The majority of negative reviews I saw came from The Singles Jukebox, however I wasn't sure how to compile them into the section. Max's album has also not been released, which makes it more difficult to find song reviews in comparison to albums. Once her album is released, I will add the negative reviews onto the second paragraph. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:24, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Commercial performance

[edit]

Europe

[edit]
  • Remove target on streaming services
Removed target. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "where Max saw an increase in streams" → "with Max seeing an increase in streams"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove wikilinks on Artist Publishing Group and Nordic countries
Removed wikilinks. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "in Sweden on October 5, 2018, for four" → "chart of Sweden on October 5, 2018, remaining at the summit for four"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "peaking at number one in both" → "and peaking at number one in both of the"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [25][26] should solely be at the end of the sentence before [27][28]
I am a bit cautious of putting the first two citations at the end of the sentence, considering WP:INTEGRITY. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The single peaked at the top of" → "The song peaked atop"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add release year of "7 Rings" in brackets
Added release year. Should I do the same to each song in the Composition and Critical reception sections? — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for selling over 1.2 million units." → "for selling 1,200,000 units in the United Kingdom."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The single was ranked at" → "It ranked at"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Shouldn't this be the first UK sentence since it came before the song's peak or certification?
Moved sentence as first UK sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove target on number one now
Removed wikilink — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "with his cover of" → "that year with his cover of"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "number one on the 2018 Irish Singles Chart Christmas number ones, beating Ariana Grande's" → "the summit on the 2018 Irish Singles Chart Christmas number ones, beating Grande's"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Give the name of the German chart
Retargeted chart name, added country name in front of chart. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "on October 26, 2018, at number 82, topping" → "at number 82 on October 26, 2018, later topping"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [35] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [36]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and was ranked at number one on the" → "and ranked at the same position on the country's"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [37] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [38]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "where it was certified" → "where it was ultimately certified"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:04, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

North America, Oceania and Brazil

[edit]
  • "on the December 29, 2018," → "for the December 29, 2018,"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "after 23 weeks" → "after 23 weeks on the chart"
Expanded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • You should instead mention the week it reached that peak initially
Removed "23 weeks" phrase. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and remained there for three" → "and remained at the position for three"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [40] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [41]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Billboard said the song's" → "The staff of Billboard said the song's"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove target on streaming age
Removed target. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "on the chart dated" → "chart for the issue dated"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [11] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [20]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for selling over two million units." → "for sales of 2,000,000 certified units in the US."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The single was ranked at number 25" → "The song ranked at number 25"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "on the May 11, 2019," → "for the May 11, 2019,"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "on November 11, 2018," → "for the issue dated November 11, 2018"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for three weeks" → "for three consecutive weeks"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [45] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [46]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for sales over 350,000 units." → "for selling 350,000 equivalent units in the country."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Added wikilink. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • [47] should be solely at the end of the sentence before [48]
Moved source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 16:45, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "it was certified platinum by Recorded Music NZ (RMNZ)." → "it was later certified platinum by Recorded Music NZ (RMNZ) for selling 30,000 units in the country."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for selling over 160,000 units." → "for selling 160,000 equivalent units."
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Controversy

[edit]
  • "The song lyrics have been criticized" → "The lyrics of "Sweet but Psycho" have been criticized"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Alim Kheraj of The Daily Telegraph stated it" → "Kheraj stated the song"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Removed source. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "stigmatize the illness;" → "stigmatize mental illness;"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "radio airplay in Ireland." → "radio airplay in their country due to the lyrics "misrepresenting psychotic illnesses"."
Expanded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Second paragraph should be merged with this one as a two sentence para definitely looks bad on GA monitors
Merged paragraphs — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the song is about several" → "that the song is about several"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the use of the word, stating it" → "the use of "psycho", stating the word"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the music video to" → "the mental illness-related music video to" with the wikilink
Reworded sentence, "music video" not wikilinked due to concern on lead section. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:35, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Music video

[edit]

Background

[edit]
  • "The music video was" → "The music video for "Sweet but Psycho" was"
Expanded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "used saturated colors so the music video" → "used saturated colors for the video so that it"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "he did not want it to" → "he did not want the visual to"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "was filmed; the sequence" → "was filmed, though the sequence"
Removed semicolon. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • The YouTube views statistic belongs at the end of the Reception sub-section instead
Moved information to reception subsection. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:38, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Synopsis

[edit]
  • Img needs alt text
Added alt text. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked latter two; "music video" wikilink query is on the lead and infobox section. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Have responded to this now for the other occasion --K. Peake 16:23, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Why is there no ref(s) for this sub-section whatsoever outside of the img text?
The plot summary section does not generally need to be sourced per MOS:PLOTSOURCE, which is considered a primary source. There are some sources which give a one sentence description about the video. Should I include them as well? — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
That also mentions that "editors are encouraged to add sourcing if possible, as this helps discourage original research", and I do not believe it is correct to have unreferenced material in an article about a song that came out as recent as 2018. --K. Peake 16:23, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I added as many citations as I could in the synopsis, as there were only a few sources which summarized the music video's plot in one sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:37, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I have re-read the mos you linked to, it seems more so to be implying that citing the actual video as a source is what could be used for the plot information and not citing nothing; only have material here that has citations and remove the rest? --K. Peake 11:33, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reading through WP:FILMPLOT and MOS:PLOTSOURCE, both seem to be lenient on the amount of sources used for a fictional synopsis, with the former mentioning that Since films are primary sources in their articles, basic descriptions of their plots are acceptable without reference to an outside source. I am content with keeping the three secondary sources inside the synopsis, as it would keep reduce the concern of WP:OR and confirm that it is verifiable. The synopsis should remain intact, as both the background and reception subsections include secondary sources which heavily rely on pre-existing knowledge of the plot, specifically with various comparisons to other films and music videos. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:42, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The video begins with a" → "The music video begins with a"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "as Ava Max walks by" → "as Max walks by"
Removed word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "spiral staircase wearing an" → "spiral staircase, wearing an"
Added comma. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Added wikilink. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Max rips a piece of clothing and invites" → "A piece of clothing is ripped by Max, and she invites"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The man arrives at the mansion," → "The man later arrives at the mansion,"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "his cup; the wine turns green." → "his cup, with it changing to green."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "drinks the liquid" → "drinks the wine"
Replaced word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "kitchen knife at him. He runs down" → "kitchen knife at him, followed by him running down"
Expanded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "who is now comatose." → "who has become comatose."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and rolls the unconscious man's head." → "and rolls his unconscious head."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "falls out in front of him." → "falls out in front of the man."
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:48, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Reception

[edit]
  • "Hannah Hightman of V Magazine described the video" → "Hannah Hightman of V magazine described the music video"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "She complimented the video's" → "She continued, complimenting the video's"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Alim Kheraj of The Daily Telegraph noted the video references" → "Kheraj noted the video for referencing"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add release years of the films and songs in brackets
Added parentheses to each. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 15:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Live performances

[edit]
  • "January 23, 2019, episode" → "January 23, 2019 episode"
Removed comma. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "she performed the single" → "Max performed the song"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "black platform shoes while" → "black platform shoes, while"
Added comma. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "She also appeared on" → "She appeared on"
Removed word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and signature hairstyle while joined" → "with her signature hairstyle while being joined"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "performed "Sweet but Psycho" on the" → "performed "Sweet but Psycho" for the"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "on April 29, 2019, as her" → "on April 29 of that year, marking her"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add release years of the songs in brackets
Added parentheses. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "long-sleeved outfit made" → "long-sleeved outfit that was made"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "began the performance with" → "began her performance with"
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Add release year of "Torn" in brackets
Added year. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Max and the dancers wore" → "Max and all the dancers wore"
Added word. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "final song in a medley after" → "final song in a medley, following"
Reworded sentence. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:44, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Track listing

[edit]
  • Retitle to Track listings
Retitled — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:49, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove target on EP
Removed target. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:49, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Personnel

[edit]
  • Retitle to Credits and personnel
Retitled — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Use {{spaced ndash}} so there is the right space between credits and personnel
Used template. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Songwriters should come before masters and mixers
Reordered — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 17:55, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Charts

[edit]
Added table captions to all charts — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:27, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Weekly charts

[edit]
  • The Bolivia peak is not displayed by the source, as I am not logged in maybe since I will assume WP:GOODFAITH?
I have not added the Bolivian chart myself, so I am unsure about the chart peak. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Would it be understandable to remove it? --K. Peake 11:33, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Removed chart. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 13:46, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • I don't think the radio charts for the Czech Republic and Slovakia should be here, as the singles digital ones are already included for the countries
Removed both charts — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Greece (IFPI) → Greece International Digital Singles (IFPI)
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Reworded — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Are you sure both Latvia charts should be here?
I am unsure about whether the LAIPA chart can be used, while the Top 40 is a radio airplay chart. I am leaning on removing the latter source, mainly as there are no other radio charts listed. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • WP:CHARTS says Record Report is supposed to be used for Venezuela so are you sure this is correct?
According to the Monitor Latino article and Argentina airplay chart on WP:CHARTS, I am going to assume WP:GOODFAITH. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:13, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Monthly charts

[edit]
  • Remove the wikilinks on the charts' publishers
Removed all wikilinks. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:14, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Year-end charts

[edit]
  • Split both of these tables properly
Split tables. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:20, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Estonia (Eesti Ekspress) → Estonia (Eesti Tipp-40)
Renamed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:20, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:20, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:20, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Certifications

[edit]
  • See MOS:TABLECAPTION
Added captions to certification table. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:29, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Release history

[edit]
  • See MOS:TABLECAPTION
Added table caption. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:41, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Format → Format(s)
Added — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:41, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Label → Label(s)
Added — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:41, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • None of the rows below the top should be centered apart from the refs
Removed center on rows, centered citations. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:41, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Digital EP and streaming should be cited for the remixes release instead with no target(s)
Removed target, replaced "Digital Download" with "Digital EP". — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 18:41, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

See also

[edit]
  • Good

References

[edit]
  • Make sure all of these are archived by using the tool, especially the dead ones
Archived all citations. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Copvio score looks fine at 37.5%
  • MOS:QWQ issues with ref 2 and Idolator should be cited as publisher instead
Fixed QWQ issues and cited publisher. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Musicnotes.com as publisher instead for ref 13
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Belfast Telegraph as work/website instead for ref 21
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked and removed caps. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove SloTop50 from the titles of refs 35 and 36
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove or replace ref 50 per WP:SELFPUB
The only other sites which contain any information is Daily Mail and UNILAD. The former is a deprecated source, while I am not sure about the reliability of the latter. Removing the section would only cause WP:UNDUEWEIGHT about the song. Are there any other sources which can be used? — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
At the time of writing, Head Stuff was ref 50 though you have since removed it so this query is no longer relevant. --K. Peake 11:33, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 52
Fixed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite BreakTudo as publisher instead for ref 53 and fix MOS:QWQ issues
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite BroadwayWorld as publisher instead for ref 54 and fix MOS:CAPS issues
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Studio Daily as publisher instead for ref 55
Cited as publisher. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove Ava Max from the author of ref 56 since she is in the title
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite V instead for ref 57 but keep the target and fix MOS:QWQ issues
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Idolator as publisher instead for ref 62 and fix MOS:QWQ issues
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 63 and delete the author
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove ref 64's author
Removed author. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:QWQ issues with ref 68
Fixed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Capital FM as publisher instead for ref 71
Cited as publisher. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs 72, 73, 74 and 75 should cite Apple Music as publisher, not using via and put the retailers in brackets i.e (US); numerous ones should be cited for them though to verify that the release was indeed various
Cited publisher, added parentheses, and added GB and AU regions. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Monitor Latino as publisher instead for ref 77 with the wikilink and add the language parameter
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs 83 and 89 are missing accessdates, while the latter needs language parameter
The Bulgarian chart has an access date, added access date and language to CIS chart. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Cited and wikilinked. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted and added language parameter. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 95
Fixed caps. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove target on Billboard for ref 96
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Plötutíðindi as the publisher instead for ref 103 and target to Music of Iceland
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove Billboard Japan from the title of ref 105 and cite it as work/website instead
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 108
Fixed caps. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove wikilink on Tophit for refs 117, 124, 151, 168 and 171
The wikilink is attached to the chart template for 117 and 124; removed remaining. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove wikilink on Rolling Stone for refs 131 and 179
Removed wikilinks. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Tophit as publisher instead for refs 133 and 135, with no wikilinks
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Delete SloTop50 from the title of ref 134 and remove the wikilink
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite Ö3 Austria Top 40 instead for refs 136 and 146, as publisher
Done — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 139
Removed caps. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • IFPI Norge → IFPI Norway on ref 142
Renamed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove hitparade.ch from the title of ref 144
Removed from title. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wikilinked — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 152
Fixed caps. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retargeted — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite dutchcharts.nl as publisher instead for ref 163
Cited — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove target on Kiss FM for ref 167
Removed — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Cite hitparade.ch as publisher for ref 170
Cited — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Fix MOS:CAPS issues with ref 192 and cite Radio Airplay SRL as publisher instead
Fixed caps and cited. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove BBC from the title of ref 194 and cite it as the publisher instead
Removed from title and cited. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 20:15, 29 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Final comments and verdict

[edit]
I have responded to the comments made above. Is it necessary to add a sample to the composition section, considering that the musical terminology would be difficult to grasp for some readers? Should I also include the release years of each song listed in the section, as it would appear disproportionate to the songs mentioned in the commercial performance section. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 14:49, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Angryjoe1111 Adding the sample would be advisable, though the release years should not be added in that section since the songs are too close. --K. Peake 17:38, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The sample has been added into the section; although it may appear 1 second over the maximum length stated on WP:SAMPLE, it was rounded up during the upload since the actual audio length is 18.6 seconds, which is under the 10% threshold of the 3:07 minute song duration. — Angryjoe1111 (talk) 04:47, 31 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Angryjoe1111 Nice edition, did some brief copy editing but I am now ready to  Pass this! --K. Peake 06:52, 31 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.