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Talk:Starstruck (The Kinks song)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 07:02, 27 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Here is another review for you this month! --K. Peake 07:02, 27 July 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

[edit]
  • Per infoboxes needing to be specific, list the release date as January 1969
  • Done.
  • Done.
  • Like previous, re-order the lead; the second sentence should mention the recording and writing, followed by the release and then comp/lyrics
  • Done.
  • "Recorded in July 1968" → "the song was recorded in July 1968" after the comma in writing
  • Done.
  • "its lyrics are" → "the lyrics are" but the grammar around this may vary depending on if you merge with the comp or not
  • Along with the mellotron, mention the genres
  • Done.
  • Wikilink lead single and mention it being released in January
  • Done.
  • "the European release made in" → "the European release being shot in"
  • How about cutting the "being", so it's just ... an accompanying promo film for the European release shot in ...
  • "The single failed to" → "The song failed to" and mention the notable chart position(s) there
  • Done.
  • "some suggest it does not relate to" → "some suggest a lack of relation to"
  • Done.

Composition and recording

[edit]
  • Img looks good!
  • I would suggest splitting this section into one for background and recording then another for composition and lyrics, as it is too large and at the moment, so place the appropriate content into a para of each section
  • I tried reorganizing things as Background and composition and Recording, with subsections for music and lyrics in the former. I think it's best to keep it ordered chronologically, detailing the song's writing, its content and then its recording.
  • "later said" does not work when there is no previously specified date/period
  • Specified year.
  • "particularly its melody and" → "particularly the melody and"
  • Done.
  • Fixed.
  • "Musically, he writes the song" → "Musically, he writes "Starstruck""
  • This is now the start of a section, so I rewrote it as Rogan writes the song musically displays ...
  • Done.
  • "suggests it was inspired by American musician" → "suggests the song was inspired by musician"
  • Done.
  • Done.
  • "of the big city" not sure what this means; please clarify?
  • Changed to "... risks of city life".
  • You should start a new sentence at "Retrospective commentators dispute" to avoid a run-on, especially since this is a summary sentence
  • Done.
  • "allowed for its inclusion," → "allowed for the song's inclusion,"
  • Done.
  • "with the album's theme of" → "with the theme of"
  • Done.
  • "with the manufactured."" → "with the manufactured"."
  • Done.
  • Remove wikilink on "Little Miss Queen of Darkness"
  • Why? Is there guidance on redirects for songs? I've looked around but I'm unsure when and when not to use these.
  • Done.
  • Remove the year for "Polly" on the second occasion since that is listed the previous sentence
  • Done.
  • Done.
  • Done.
  • "while Davies sings" → "with Davies singing"
  • Done.
  • Nice catch. Done.
  • "quickly in August," → "quickly in August 1968,"
  • Done.

Release and reception

[edit]
  • Img looks good!
  • "released the twelve-track edition" → "released the 12-track edition" per MOS:NUM
  • I believe it's fine by MOS:NUMERAL: Integers greater than nine expressible in one or two words may be expressed either in numerals or in words
  • "with fifteen tracks" → "with 15 tracks"
  • See above.
  • "described "Starstruck"'s use" → "described the song's use"
  • Done.
  • Mention when the West Europe release was
  • Sources unfortunately don't specify beyond November 1968 for the Netherlands and 8 or 15 January 1969 for the US. Looking at when the single first appeared in different charts isn't an option either since the song didn't chart anywhere besides the Netherlands.
  • Remove overly obvious wikilink on Scandinavia
  • Done.
  • Done.
  • Mention the Netherlands release was a 7" single per the source
  • Done.
  • "to the US release" → "to the United States release"
  • "United States release" sounds a little awkward to my ear. How about "American release"?
  • "which initially lead" → "which initially led"
  • Whoops! Fixed.
  • Shouldn't the inclusion in Last Night in Soho's soundtrack be mentioned here?
  • I originally couldn't find a source that mentioned its inclusion beyond a simple accounting of the track listing, but now I've found a piece in Den of Geek to help include it in the body.

Personnel

[edit]
  • Are you sure handclaps should be listed in this section when the player is unidentified? They can still stay in prose either way.
  • In detailing the Kinks' working process, Andy Miller writes the band added extra percussion as part of the rhythm track (p. 21) and for "Starstruck" he writes it includes a the band's "familiar line-up", including handclaps, so I definitely think it goes here. To put it under "Additional musician(s)" would be to make a leap not asserted by the source.

Charts

[edit]
  • Add for "Starstruck" after weekly chart performance
  • Done.

See also

[edit]
  • Not sure about this section per my earlier comment about the soundtrack inclusion
  • Removed.

Notes

[edit]
  • Good

References

[edit]

Copyvio score looks awesome at 18.0%!!!

  • Is "from May 1968 and later" really notable additionally on ref 16?
  • I realized I could simplify things with different pages.
  • Refs 21 and 37 both cite p. 85; is the n25 part of 21 really important enough for a separate ref?
  • It's in a note so it'd have to be a different citation. I think it's important to be as specific as possible for WP:VERIFY.

Bibliography

[edit]
  • I see that Backbeat has gone through a couple owners. Rowman & Littlefield bought it from Hal Leonard LLC in 2018 and Hal Leonard acquired it from CMP in 2006. Hinman's book was published in 2004, so shouldn't it instead pipe to CMP?
  • Done.
[edit]
  • Good

Final comments and verdict

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