Talk:South End–Groesbeckville Historic District/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 04:40, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:
· · ·

Copy changes

Geography

Within this boundary are 520 buildings; all but 13 of which are — should be a comma, not a semicolon

~~They're independent clauses that can both stand alone as sentences, therefore making that change would be a comma splice.~~ Daniel Case (talk) 21:05, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Oh wait, I see your point. Daniel Case (talk) 21:08, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Done Daniel Case (talk) 21:09, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

History

during the second of these, the French and Indian War, corresponding to the Seven Years' War in Europe — this part should be surrounded by emdashes, not commas, because it already has one comma inside

Done Daniel Case (talk) 21:08, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

it seems that the descendants — the "it seems" wording is a bit weird here

Fixed That's because, per the source, there aren't any statistics to support this. I reworded that and a sentence elsewhere in the paragraph to make that clearer. Daniel Case (talk) 15:13, 28 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Preservation and revitalization

one in three of the 67 percent African American residents — wondering if this should be a bit more straightforward, like one in three residents—in a an area that was 67 percent African American, to be less confusing

Fixed Daniel Case (talk) 01:28, 29 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Consider using a {{quote box}} for the McLaughlin quote; it's the sort of thing I'd put in a callout. I wonder if the quote in the next section may also be too long. 33.3 percent similarity is a bit higher than I'd like to see.

Fixed I usually don't put quotes like that in boxes, as long as they work inline, but I felt you had a point about maybe not quoting so much from the source. Daniel Case (talk) 01:28, 29 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Other notes

Article has been virtually untouched since nomination.
The page is wonderfully rich in freely licensed images of contributing properties. They are all appropriately captioned and placed, often near discussion of the building itself.

Yes, thank you ... since when I go up to Albany from where I live (which I was doing more frequently a decade ago when I wrote and researched this), the South End is the part of the city I come to first, so it was relatively easy to hop off I-787 and get pictures of the more important/significant buildings.

I still have the idea of taking a nice panoramic of the South End from the interstate some day. Daniel Case (talk) 05:29, 29 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Status

@Daniel Case: On hold to address the copy changes and reduce the quote; ping me when these issues are addressed. The page looks great, just was time for some fresh eyes. You've put a lot of work in, especially on the image side, and it really shows. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 05:04, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you. It's late so I will be working on this tomorrow. Daniel Case (talk) 05:52, 27 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Everything looks good, will pass. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 22:04, 29 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]