Talk:Sky Pool, London/GA1
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[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 19:39, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
I'll be taking a look at this! — GhostRiver 19:39, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Lede
[edit]- Wow, there's a lot happening in that first sentence. Suggest:
The Sky Pool is a swimming pool at the Embassy Gardens development in the Nine Elms region of Wandsworth, a borough of southwest London.
- Delink "swimming pool" per MOS:OVERLINK
- Remove "Plebeians" in the caption as POV
- "The pool was perceived as emblematic of economic inequalities in London upon its unveiling in May 2021." → "Unveiled in May 2021, the pool was criticized as emblematic of economic inequalities in London."
Location
[edit]- Not to be pedantic, but Nine Elms and Wandsworth are not explicitly mentioned here
- I'd rearrange here so that we start with "it's in Embassy Gardens/Nine Elms/Wandsworth, which was built by EcoWorld Ballymore," then "The world's first "floating" swimming pool, it bridges a gap..." then the rest as is
- 'floating' → "floating" per MOS:DOUBLE
Design
[edit]- The first sentence can be removed, as it is mentioned above
- Then the second sentence starts with "Extending between the two Legacy buildings of the Embassy Gardens development, the pool is heated..."
- "to preserve the large size of the pool" → "to preserve its large size"
- "Architectural Digest
magazine"
Reception
[edit]- Start a new sentence where the semicolon is
- Combine the Wainwright and Cherner paragraphs
Sociological critiques
[edit]- Good
References
[edit]- All authors should be listed as "Last, First" rather than "First Last"
General comments
[edit]- Photos are properly licensed and relevant
- No stability concerns in the revision history
- Earwig copyvio score is a little high, but direct quotes are attributed
Putting on hold to allow nominator to address comments. Feel free to ping me with any questions. — GhostRiver 21:57, 21 October 2021 (UTC)
- I've made your suggested changes, thank you so much for a thorough review! No Swan So Fine (talk) 14:35, 27 October 2021 (UTC)
- I made a number of follow-up edits myself, and now I think that this is ready to pass. Good job! — GhostRiver 15:00, 27 October 2021 (UTC)
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.