Talk:Sherlock (TV series)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: TBrandley (talk · contribs) 04:37, 28 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this article shortly. This article looks good though. TBran dl ey 05:20, 28 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Images

File:Sherlock titlecard.jpg could deal with a much better rationale, just in case it is up for deletion Used the image from FA The Apprentice (UK TV series) as a template.

Infobox

Believe "crime drama" should be "police procedural" followed by "drama" Is there a consensus for this genre? Not sure Sherlock fits in with 'police procedural' as the genuine police are featured minimally. Perhaps is more of an US expression?
In the infobox, what is "Masterpiece" and "BBC" for. This is for "executive producer" parameter Question: Rebecca Eaton is specified as being the executive producer for Masterpiece, with B. Jones the EP for the BBC. This is in addition to the first three names listed. The JPS ^{talk to me} 10:02, 29 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]
In the infobox, use "90 minutes" rather than "93 mins". Don't be afraid to write it fully. Done
In the infobox, SDTV should be before HDTV Done
In the infobox, link stereo Done
For the infobox, Template:Infobox television says "Do not use "SDTV" as it is ambiguous." That being said, I see "576i (SDTV)". Please, remove the "SDTV". Done
Add the official website to the infobox using the "website" parameter. Think its at BBC.co.uk Done

Lede

"Sherlock is a British television" "British television" shouldn't be linked as per WP:OVERLINK Done
"Benedict Cumberbatch as Sherlock Holmes" unlink Sherlock Holmes as it is linked above. Done
I believe that Sherlock Holmes should just be Holmes as per WP:MOS Done
"Six episodes, broadcast between 2010 and 2012, have been produced and broadcast". Repetitive. Remove "broadcast" from "produced and broadcast" Done
Six episodes, broadcast between 2010 and 2012". Re-write to: "Six episodes, broadcast since 25 July 2010". Or just 2010 Done
"The series has been sold to over 180 territories." "The series was conceived by Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss during train journeys to and from the Doctor Who production base in Cardiff, where they were both writers." "The series depicts "consulting detective". Too many uses of "the series" consider re-writing. Examples: "programme, show, etc." Done
"produced the series for the BBC" should be "produced the series for the British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC), as per WP:MOS. After its original use, use only BBC per the same guideline OK, I've changed it, but not convinced -- FAs, such as Pauline Fowler, just use BBC
"The series was primarily filmed" past tense. Its still broadcast on television. Use "is primarily filmed" Done
"The series was primarily filmed in Cardiff". Unlink Cardiff. Its already been linked above Done
"The series depicts "consulting detective" Sherlock Holmes". Just use "Holmes", as its already above. Please keep that in mind for the future. Done
"in July and August 2010, with a second series of three episodes first broadcast in January 2012". Already parts are above. Consider changing the above "between 2010 and 2012", or change this. Thanks Partly done
"nominated for many awards" "many". Not encyclopaedic, how about "numerous" Done
"UK" should be "United Kingdom" Done
"The first series won the BAFTA Television Award for Best Drama Series" quick run-on sentence. How about merging with next sentence creating this: "The first series won the BAFTA Television Award for Best Drama Series, and all six episodes have been released on DVD and Blu-ray Disc in the UK, alongside tie-in editions of some of Conan Doyle's original books", etc. Removed that phrase, as no need to specify one particular award -- the preceding sentence covers it.

Production

Development: Rename it to "Conception" I've renamed to 'Conception and development'?
Development: "The series is a collaboration between Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss" re-write perhaps to: "Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss devised the concept of the series", etc. then continue Done
Development: "The series is a collaboration between Steven Moffat and Mark Gatiss". Why isn't Moffat and Gatiss linked? Its the first mention in the actual article Done
Development: "The two writers are both big Sherlock Holmes fans." Run-on sentence. Merge with the next sentence. Too many short sentences can get old Done
Development: "The two writers are both big Sherlock Holmes fans" shouldn't that be linked? Sherlock Holmes (moved to the first sentence in this section.)
Development: "The writers realised that someone else would have the same idea to produce a modern-day version, so they wanted to do it before anyone else did". Isn't really encyclopaedic, right, please re-word Done
Development: "encouraged them to start to work out how they might do it themselves". Awkward. Figure what out by themselves Done
Development: "However, the first version of the pilot—reported by The Guardian to have cost £800,000". Link The Guardian Done
Development: "led to rumours within the BBC" make the BBC to British Broadcasting Corporation (BBC). Also, now link British Broadcasting Corporation, not the BBC which should be in brackets Done
Development: "the creative team say" should be "the creative team said" Done
Development: "In July 2009, the BBC drama department announced plans for three 90-minute episodes, to be broadcast in 2010" merge everything in that whole paragraph. As said in WP:MOS guidelines, people don't like to read two sentence paragraphs. Sorry if too harsh Done
Cast: Should be renamed to "Casting" Done
Cast: Sorry, but after looking at the section; should be renamed to "Cast and characters". Thank you. Done
Cast: Sherlock isn't needed there just be "series'" Clarifies -- it's referring to the character
Recording: "The show was produced by Hartswood Films for BBC Wales. BBC Worldwide also provided co-production funding" two short sentences how about re-writing to: "The show was produced by Hartswood Films for BBC Wales, while BBC Worldwide also provided co-production funding" Done
Recording: Unlink cardiff; its already been linked above Done
Recording: Unless your talking about the character, Sherlock should be italicized Question: If you mean the bit about technology, it's meant to refer to the character.
Music: "The music". What music? the theme music, dance music, silly music, etc. LOL Done

Episodes

"have been produced and broadcast", remove "and broadcast"; its already mentioned in the next sentence(s) Done
"180 territories" could you name some country/international channel that the series airs on outside of UK Added PBS. In my experience, this is a minefield. Earlier versions did this, then it exploded into an unsourced, directory-like list of various countries and when they were broadcast. Then there's notability issues -- which do we include, and which do we leave out? There was some discussion on the talk page.
Steve Moffat should be Moffat as its already firstly mentioned above Done
"wrote the episode" it would seem most of that stuff is already above in the "Recording" section Done
"The second series' final episode ..." has nothing to do with Series 3, it is Series 2 some restructuring
"same time as series two" as the finale aired, right? It means to communicate that series two and three were commissioned at the same time, but they had previously only revealed that series two ad been commissioned.

Reception

'early 2013' don't need those single quotation marks Done
shows' should be show's Done
More ratings info? Overall ratings for Series 1, 2 Done
Reception should be renamed to "Accolades" Done
several awards → numerous awards Done

Home release and merchandise

"2entertain in the UK" write fully to United Kingdom Done
"The second series UK disc" write fully to United Kingdom Done

References

I have made the changes for the section

External links

"Sherlock at BBC Online". Use "BBC Programmes", use the {{BBC Programme}} (talk) template to help you. Please, and thanks. Done
Add TV.com link for the show. Done
"Contains various comprehensive guides to episodes, locations, and cast and crew.", "Showing the connections the new TV show makes to the original stories, compiled by comic book historian Alan Kistler.", "Interview with composer Michael Price about scoring the Sherlock series.". Don't really need that, Wikipedia:Wikipedia is not a directory or guide. Sherlockology retained, per Wikipedia:Manual_of_Style_(television)#External_links, as a "major fansite website" -- it carries an endorsement from producer Sue Vertue, and is much more helpful than TV.com
Though the page use "(TV series)", the Wikiquote and Commons boxs on the side should still use only "Sherlock". Done
Add Yahoo! TV link for the show. Done
Add TV Guide link for the show. Done
Add "Sherlock Wiki" link for the show. , even though it looks full of advertising...

Response

Many thanks for this review. I'll work through them, and use the 'done'/'partly done' icons to indicate my progress and comments. Those templates embolden my comments, so it should be clear which are your words and which are mine. The JPS ^{talk to me} 09:49, 29 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

OK, that was painless. There's a couple of things I'm unsure about -- as marked...? The JPS ^{talk to me} 10:39, 29 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

You can keep it as Crime drama. Oh, and please link crime drama. I'm still doing the rest of my review. Most issues will be posted soon. TBran dl ey 16:16, 29 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Added some more issues to be fixed. TBran dl ey 16:35, 29 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Concerning the territory/station issue, I would at least mention PBS if it hasn't been already. They partially funded it, after all. Glimmer721 ^talk 00:10, 2 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]

That makes sense. It would need to be handled carefully to highlight the co-funding, and not to invite another 178 additions. I've added PBS to the top of the Episodes section. The JPS ^{talk to me} 09:58, 2 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Good work. I'll pass for GA. TBran dl ey 21:50, 2 August 2012 (UTC)[reply]