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GA Review

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Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: HaEr48 (talk · contribs) 08:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

I'll take this review. Expect feedback in the next few days. HaEr48 (talk) 08:00, 24 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

General

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In my opinion, this still needs a lot of works to fulfill GA requirements. See Wikipedia:Good article criteria, particularly criteria 1a, 1b, 2a, 4. One of the main concern is that it reads a lot like a promotional material, with heavy use of praise-filled words to describe the subject. Such wording may be appropriate for Strait Times articles written to highlight the subject, but aren't good for Wikipedia. In addition, the grammar isn't solid in many places, please consider asking someone to copyedit the article. There are many simple lists (directories of schools, churches, etc.) without much context. A lot of citations are missing author, title, date, publisher, and need to be fixed. Please see below for more details. I'll put the GA review on hold for seven days, and then we'll see whether this article can be realistically passed. Thanks. HaEr48 (talk) 06:21, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Detailed

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 Done 1.02 editor (talk) 22:29, 28 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Who came up with the name "Town of the Seafarer"? Is it the official nickname? HaEr48 (talk)

07:51, 30 January 2018 (UTC)

It appeared in a 2000 newspaper article and afterwards became its unofficial name. 1.02 editor (talk) 10:15, 1 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]
 Done1.02 editor (talk) 08:57, 8 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

07:51, 30 January 2018 (UTC)

  • "bring life through the town" please use a more neutral, encyclopedic way to phrase this.
    •  Done as above
  • In general, the “Highlights” is full of writings that reads like a commercial (too tiring to list one by one). Maybe because the source is a newspaper. Please rewrite and use more neutral, descriptive tone rather than praising the town or the planners. See examples from GA towns here Wikipedia:Good_articles/Geography_and_places#Places.
  • “North East Line”: rearrange the paragraph, to mention North East Line first before mentioning other lines that connects to NEL
  • "integrated into a building complex to allow seamless travel" less promotional tone please. Other than being connected to a bus interchange, are there other notable things about this station?
  • "Sengkang is well connected to many parts of Singapore and getting into and out of the town is relatively easy": this is subjective. If it’s an opinion of a reliable source, please attribute it.
  • According to WP:NOTDIRECTORY. “Simple listings without context information” are discouraged. I see many such simple listings in this article, e.g. in “Education”, “Places of worship”, “Sengkang Town Centre”, “Sengkang Town Centre”, “Welfare Services”, “Community Centres/Clubs”, and so on give lists upon lists without much context. Either remove them, or convert them to a prose that contains less indiscriminate information
  • "Politics" -> before launching into the details of each constituencies and elections, please begin this section with a summary paragraph, so that the reader can expect what’s coming next. Even after reading the whole section it’s unclear to me, how many constituencies are there, which part of Sengkang they correspond to, who are the MPs and which parties they’re from.

 Done 1.02 editor (talk) 11:20, 27 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

The first para is not clear enough. (1) Outside Singapore, people might not know what "GE2015" means, and (2) it's not that the whole Sengkang is part of four constituencies, it's divided into parts that each is part of different constituencies. HaEr48 (talk) 07:51, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@1.02 editor: I updated the bullet points above. Strikethrough means I am satisfied by the update, please look at the rest (in some cases I left new comments). Also, I'm planning to give a second round of comments, maybe tomorrow. HaEr48 (talk) 07:51, 30 January 2018 (UTC)[reply]

More questions

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More details needed

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Thanks for working on the article. I gave it another read, I think in order to have broad coverage like GAs for places in general it is missing some information

  • Demographics: Please explain the population. Seem you have numbers in the infobox. Also include it in prose, as well as details like race, religion, language, education level, etc. if available.

 Done 1.02 editor (talk) 07:53, 10 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Regarding citations to The Straits Times

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@1.02 editor: is it possible to locate the cited news articles from the Straits Times in NLB's eResources newspaper archive? Many of them right now are lacking author and/or page, and are also difficult to access. ~ KN2731 {tc} 03:24, 4 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@KN2731: I used ref 53 as a test and discovered that most of the articles either could not be found or can only be accessed from a library. 1.02 editor (talk) 04:12, 4 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry guys might be a bit busy these few weeks. 1.02 editor (talk) 14:58, 5 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Passing

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I'm satisfied with the current state of the article, so passing now. Thanks for all who participate. There are some minor fixes to be made to the references. Please include more info for citation 3, 39, 50, 51. Also, please expand acronyms such as HDB, LTA, KKH in citations, because these are not well-known outside Singapore. HaEr48 (talk) 04:35, 26 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Ok Thanks 1.02 editor (talk) 02:33, 27 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Thank you for your patience with this review! ~ KN2731 {tc} 07:58, 27 February 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Thanks!  Anchorvale T@lk | Contributions  06:46, 5 March 2018 (UTC)[reply]