Talk:Sarah Abbott
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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
[edit]This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Figgy puddin. Peer reviewers: Mintandlavender, Cinema4242.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 03:20, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
Feedback for Figgy puddin
[edit]Hi Figgy puddin,
Great work on this article so far! It is very well written and easy to read. The detailed account of her filmography and their awards is very significant and detailed! I have a few suggestions to make the article even better. First, I would encourage you to create a chart for her filmography and awards to make the information even more concise and clear. Second, I would suggest you take the individual films out of the contents box, as there is not enough content on the page to warrant their own direct link. Third, I think the article would be stronger if you explained the Starlight Tours in context to the film and how they were described or portrayed, rather than a historical context so that the information pertains to Abbot's life more.
Once again great work! Please let me know if you have any questions or concerns.
Cinema4242 (talk) 04:31, 31 October 2018 (UTC)
Second student peer review below:
The introduction section is a good length and includes highlights like film awards and the educational background of Sarah Abbott in filmmaking/film study. The references/ scholarly sources mentioned in the article seem to be from valid and solid sources. There are a few run-on sentences but the flow and structure of the "Career" section is good. I feel like I have learned a decent amount of information about the filmmaker and her films through this wikipedia page. A few grammatical errors that I have amended. The article includes a filmography and a list of awards which add to the filmmakers notability. I feel like more information could be added to this article to make it more comprehensive. For example, information on Sarah Abbott's unique filmmaking style would add to the article. Or other personal information pertaining to her career or filmmaking in general. This article is good but still a little bit short. Perhaps more information could be added to make it a more comprehensive article. Parts about Indigenous films that Sarah Abbott have made are interesting. It would be good to include possible reviews on those films or public opinion/backlash. (specifically to the film about police and indigenous communities.) More diverse sources would also be good. It might be a good idea to talk about the film "why i hate bees" including details about the film and the criticisms or praise that it received. It seems to be an important film in Sarah Abbott's career so it would be useful to expand on that. Mintandlavender (talk) 22:25, 1 November 2018 (UTC)MintandLavender
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