Talk:Ron and Tammy/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
[edit]Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: Xtzou (Talk) 16:12, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
Hi, I have a few questions/comments.
- "In the episode, the library department tries to take the pit from Leslie. Ron's ex-wife" - what is the "pit"? It is not mentioned in the plot section.
- Reworded to be more clear. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- "Donna (Retta) insists to Leslie that the arrangement is a mistake because the two are crazy together." - "crazy together" - Is that a colloquialism?
- Reworded. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- 'Offerman responded, "Yeah, that would be amazing." ' Not sure what this means in the context of the wikipedia article. It makes a little more sense in the news article because more context is given there than is lacking here.
- I just mean to convey that Offerman was very responsive to the idea. I've dropped the quote and paraphrased instead. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- "Offerman accidentally pulled a diner table out of the wall while Mullally laid on top of it." Do you mean "while Mullally was lying on top of it"? (Although I can't feature how she would be lying on top of a wall)
- I tried to make this more clear as well. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- Perhaps it should be emphasized somewhere that the actors playing Ron and Tammy are real world husband and wife. I think it is only mentioned in the lead, and I had to spend some time figuring out who was married to whom amidst all the names, real and fictional.
- The first paragraph of the production section says, "Mullally is the real-life wife of Nick Offerman, who plays Ron Swanson in Parks and Recreation." Do you think I should reword the sentence to place more emphasis on it? Some specific wording suggestions would be helpful... — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- "in exchange for a 40 percent commission and Brandon" - I don't get the "and Brandon" part.
- That's a mistake, I'm not sure where it came from. Dropped it. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- "2.2 rating/6 share" - what does the rating mean, a 6 percent share?
- Added wording to explain this. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- "Steve Heisler from The A.V. Club praised the episode and the performance of Swanson" - I had to do a search to find out who Swanson was. Most of the time you call him "Ron". I think you need to be consistent as there are already so many names and characters. And Swanson is the character's name, right? So he critic is praising the performance of a character? Am I misunderstanding?
- That should refer to Offerman, not Swanson. Fixed. — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
Xtzou (Talk) 16:12, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks for the review! — Hunter Kahn 18:40, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks! Another nicely written piece. Xtzou (Talk) 19:03, 13 April 2010 (UTC)
GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria
- Is it reasonably well written?
- A. Prose quality:
- B. MoS compliance:
- A. Prose quality:
- Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
- A. References to sources:
- B. Citation of reliable sources where necessary:
- C. No original research:
- A. References to sources:
- Is it broad in its coverage?
- A. Major aspects:
- B. Focused:
- A. Major aspects:
- Is it neutral?
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- Is it stable?
- No edit wars, etc:
- No edit wars, etc:
- Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- B. Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:
- A. Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
- Overall:
- Pass or Fail: Pass!
- Pass or Fail: Pass!
Congradulations! Xtzou (Talk) 19:03, 13 April 2010 (UTC)