Talk:Rhyl Pier/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 09:21, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

Comments

• If the official name is "Victoria Pier", shouldn't Victoria Pier have a hatnote to send people here?

Quite a few piers of the time were officially, or unofficially, called Victoria Pier. With the actual Victoria Pier article, I have pondered (and am pondering) moving to a region-specific title, as that also hatnotes to another pier by that name. There is also South Pier, Blackpool, Royal Pier, Southampton and Fleetwood Pier to name a few called "Victoria Pier". Although not relevant to the review, I wonder if Victoria Pier should be a DAB.

• "town of Rhyl, Wales and" comma after Wales.

Sure.  Done

• "of over one-half mile (0.80 km)," but the infobox says it was 718 metres long...

This is a fair point, so I changed the lead to match the rest.  Done

• "that followed. Following" repetitive.

Changed to "ensuing years".  Done

• "Several disasters occurred during the pier's lifespan, in particular several incidents" are they all "disasters" or more likely just "incidents"/"accidents"?

I have reworded.  Done

• "pictures' to a full audience in the Grand Pavilion." this doesn't appear to be a disaster, and this is the first mention of the Grand Pavilion, I assume it was on the pier, but that's not been stated.

It isn't a disaster or incident, but flows with the timeline chronology. Will consider the pavilion matter.

I have moved the sentence of the pavilion to the first paragraph so that this is introduced correctly.  Done

• "largest organ" do we know what type of organ it was?

Although mentioned in numerous sources, including Greater Manchester Architects, there is no mention of the type of organ this is. An old newspaper article gives specifications, but not necessarily answers your question.

• I would expect to see the designer noted in the lead.

Good spot.  Done

• "on the East Parade," mention Rhyl again here in the first section of the main body.

Can you elucidate? I thought it's implied by the article that we're talking about a structure in Rhyl.

• "with board members" which board?

Implied from book ref that its board members of 'The Victoria Pier Company'.  Done

• "Pier Company[4] and following" comma after Company.

Sure.  Done

• The Location section looks like it can be merged into the History section, it seems odd on its own.

It's not uncommon to have a dedicated section for a location. The section itself is also not too small. The whole pier is historic, so is merging into history moot?

• Link MP appropriately.

This just involves changing "[[Richard Rowley (MP)|Richard Rowley]] MP" to "[[Richard Rowley (MP)]]"?  Done

I meant link the acronym MP to the appropriate UK Member of Parliament article. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 19:31, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

OK, have done this now.  Done

• "During construction, the initial..." which initial? Looks like there were several attempts to start this...

I have gone back to the ref and rephrased.  Done

• "Victoria Pier[2] opened on 19th August 1867[2] at" 19 August, and no need for those refs to go there, put them at the end of the clause.

Good spot. I must have had some other content in between at some point that was removed and forgot to take out the redundant citation.  Done

• "Columbus" boat names are italicised.

Sure.  Done

• And steamboat is overlinked.

Removed.  Done

• "in 1893.[16] In 1898" repetitive.

Not entirely sure I understood this, but I have restructured none the less.  Done

• "Warhurst of Manchester, of" Manchester overlinked.

I guess, as it's linked earlier.  Done

• "numerous perpendicular supporting piles" not clear why that's an issue.

Good spot, it wouldn't be. I think I misquoted. I have rephrased.  Done

• "found the supporting piles to be" linked on the second instance.

Linked the previous instance.  Done

• "In a derelict state,[24] Rhyl Urban District Council purchased the pier on" -> " Rhyl Urban District Council purchased the pier in a derelict state,[24] on"

The ref for the derelict state also supports the preceding sentence. To restructure, i'd have to declare the citation at the former sentence, then cite this same ref for the dereliction?

Right now, the "in a derelict state" applies to the Rhyl Urban District Council... The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 19:31, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

I have shifted the reference and slightly restructured the sentence.  Done

• "at 5 pence per" link pence.

Can do. Linked to Penny (British decimal coin), as it would have been by the 1970s.  Done

• "to and from Liverpool. When" overlinked.

Sure.  Done

• 3000 or 3,000?

Lets go with the comma. This seems typical standard.  Done

• "than 2 years" two.

Sure.  Done

• Ref 3 needs en-dash.

Sure.  Done

• Ref 26 SHOUTING.

This is verbatim as printed from the newspaper source. It's whether it should be duplicated as-is or lowercased. I'll lc anyway.  Done

• Showing Harvard errors, I think your Easdown & Thomas refs need a publication year in their {{sfn}}'s.

Unsure how I totally missed that, so now sorted.  Done

That's all I have. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 10:29, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

Thanks TRM. Will go through your points soon and work on the improvements. Bungle ^{(talk • contribs)} 13:09, 30 August 2021 (UTC)

@The Rambling Man: I have now either addressed or commented/queried on all your points raised. You may need to directly respond to some points, though the majority I accept as an improvement needed and have implemented. Bungle ^{(talk • contribs)} 19:22, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

Bungle couple of replies. The Rambling Man (Keep wearing the mask...) 19:31, 2 September 2021 (UTC)

@The Rambling Man: Sorry that it's taken me a few days, this week has been a very busy one. I have enacted changes on those you followed up, please take a quick look. I observed that you did not address some other points, thus I assume you accept the comment or explanation I offered and that it needs no further adjustment. Bungle ^{(talk • contribs)} 10:11, 5 September 2021 (UTC)