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Talk:Red Hook Park/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Reviewer: Kncny11 (talk · contribs) 20:34, 3 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]


Sup! I'm going to be taking a look at this GAN as well. Any section marked with a  Working tag means that I haven't finished combing through it, but feel free to start making changes as you see them! Kncny11 (shoot) 20:34, 3 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Infobox and lede

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  • The infobox lists the area as 127.5 acres, which is inconsistent with the rest of the article
  • Once again, every sentence in the second paragraph is written in passive voice. The second sentence (Joseph L. Hautman) and fourth (The Sol Goldman Play Center) can be made active
    •  Done

Description

[edit]

Recreation fields

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  • Ref [2] doesn't appear to mention the area of the park
  • Ref [4] mentions nothing about tennis courts or a picnic area
    • minus Removed
  • "Directly across from Clinton Street,"
    • plus Added
  • "is a recreational area soccer field 1" is there a word missing there?
  • "This playground used to contain a wading pool"
    • plus Added

Red Hook Play Center

[edit]
  • Switch hyphen to en dash for "1934-36"
    • I rephrased the sentence to avoid a dash entirely
  • "The west and east wings are both divided" → "Both wings" in the second sentence of the paragraph beginning "The west wing", to reduce repetition
    •  Done
  • Kill the space between the end of the sentence and the reference at the end of the last bathhouse para
    • minus Removed
  • More clarification than anything: the past tense is used for the arcades on the west and east wing -- did something happen to them to change this? The rest of the para is in present tense
  • "The main pool measures" → "It measures"
    •  Done

History

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Site

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  • WL Red Hook here (first iteration of the neighborhood in the body)
    •  Done

Works Progress Administration

[edit]

Decline and renovations

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  • "In the 1940s, the Gowanus Parkway was built by parks commissioner Moses," → "In the 1940s, Moses built the Gowanus Parkway"
    •  Done
  • "eighteen thousand residents" → "18,000 residents" per MOS:NUMBERS
    •  Done
  • Move [75] to the end of the sentence
    •  Done
  • Add meter conversion for the "18-foot tall metal fence"
    •  Done

References

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  • Ref [2] says that it links to Highlights, but it actually links to History
    •  Fixed

General comments

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  • Stability looks good.
  • Pictures are CC and relevant.
  • Earwig is temporarily down -- I'll AGF for now and come back around to this.

Putting  On hold for now. Will check Earwig when possible.

@Kncny11: Thanks for another review. I've addressed all of these issues. For [2], the area is within the sidebar at the bottom right, but it is a History section so I've fixed that. Epicgenius (talk) 21:51, 3 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Epicgenius Quick on the draw! Earwig is back up and checked out, so I think this one is good to go! :) Kncny11 (shoot) 21:57, 3 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.