Talk:Ptolemy I Soter/GA1
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Reviewer: Gog the Mild (talk · contribs) 19:22, 7 July 2018 (UTC)
I'll have a look at this over the next day or three. Gog the Mild (talk) 19:22, 7 July 2018 (UTC)
@Векочел:
- It's a very good article. Very little to do for GA.
- I have done some light copy editing, could you please check.
- The link for cite 25 is dead.
- I found the link. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- Several publisher locations which are available are missing.
I have added them.
- At least one ISBN which is available is missing.
- If you tell me which one, I'll try to fix it. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- The last sentence of "Early career" is not referenced.
- I have removed that sentence because I could not find a source. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- The last part of the first paragraph of "Successor of Alexander" is not referenced.
- I have added Hugh Chisholm's "Ptolemies" as a source for that. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- "However, he did send great assistance to Rhodes when it was besieged by Demetrius (305/304). Pausanias reports that the grateful Rhodians bestowed the name Soter ("saviour") upon him as a result of lifting the siege. This account is generally accepted by modern scholars, although the earliest datable mention of it is from coins issued by Ptolemy II in 263 BC. " is not referenced.
- I have used the source you provided for the Siege of Rhodes. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- In "Lost history of Alexander's campaigns" there are bracketed references to Anabasis; could you replace them with references similar to those used elsewhere.
- I have edited those references so they are similar to other references in the article. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- A significant issue: the lead. The first paragraph is fine. The second is not a summary of material covered elsewhere in the article. Can I strongly suggest that you move it to become the first paragraph of the article proper and write a new paragraph, or two, for the lead summarising his life. Gog the Mild (talk) 14:46, 11 July 2018 (UTC)
- I have moved most of the second paragraph of the lead to the top of the article proper. Векочел (talk) 20:25, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
Hi Векочел. How are you getting on with the points above? Let me know when you have finished them and I'll have another look at the article. Gog the Mild (talk) 14:27, 21 July 2018 (UTC)
- @Gog the Mild: My editing of the article has come along quite well. I tried to find citations for claims or otherwise remove them. I did some editing on the second lead paragraph as well. Векочел (talk) 16:15, 21 July 2018 (UTC)
- @Векочел: For the siege of Rhodes you need Diodorus. A quick Google gives the last two paragraphs of this. Cyrenaica - not the best source in the world, but try half way down this. This may also be of use. Gog the Mild (talk) 17:05, 21 July 2018 (UTC)
- @Векочел: Hi. It has been a month since I posted my first comments. It is usual to allow a week for a response. Could you come back in the next few days with some progress please. Gog the Mild (talk) 18:12, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- @Gog the Mild: I have used the citations that you suggested to add some information to the article. Векочел (talk) 18:21, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- @Векочел: Good. Thank you. Could you respond to each of the points above. If you have dealt with one, then simply inserting "Done" underneath is fine. Thanks. Gog the Mild (talk) 18:52, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- @Gog the Mild: I have used the citations that you suggested to add some information to the article. Векочел (talk) 18:21, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
- @Векочел: Hi. It has been a month since I posted my first comments. It is usual to allow a week for a response. Could you come back in the next few days with some progress please. Gog the Mild (talk) 18:12, 10 August 2018 (UTC)
@Векочел: Good work. Thank you. It is not really the assessor's job to flag up each error in the references, but, references 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5 are missing ISBNs. 22 is missing an OCLC. 7 sources do not have publisher locations. I use WorldCat to find this sort of information. So if you look here you will see that the 2006 edition of Cleopatra: A Sourcebook was published in Norman and that its ISBN (scroll down) is 978-0806137414.
PS An OCLC is not needed for the Encyclopædia Britannica.. Gog the Mild (talk) 10:29, 13 August 2018 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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