Talk:Protonectarina
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A fact from Protonectarina appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 12 November 2014 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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This article was the subject of an educational assignment in Fall 2014. Further details were available on the "Education Program:Washington University in St. Louis/Behavioral Ecology (Fall 2014)" page, which is now unavailable on the wiki. |
Final Notes
[edit]Overall, I really like your article. Particularly, I think your prose is excellent for this type of article; your page feels like an entry in an encyclopedia which is really great. I looked though your article and did not find any grammatical or gaps in your article. However, I do think that there are several things that you might want to consider in order to make your article good status. For example, the second criterion in order to become a good article is that your page is verifiable. While I believe, your article is correctly cited, your page only has seven citations. Compared with the other good articles that I looked at, many had upwards of 20. I think you should consider adding more sources which will not only help you reach good article status but also help give your article authority to the reader. Another aspect that I would consider expanding on is making your article broader in scope. I think you do a great job of giving the general information on the wasp, but it could be beneficial to add sections on what the predators of Protonectarina are and the major food sources of the species. Finally, while I know our class is having trouble uploading pictures, if would be great if you could try to upload one if you can. Having an image associated with the information you present could be really beneficial to the reader. I hope these suggestions help. Great job on your article! Amanda.Kalupa (talk) 09:21, 20 November 2014 (UTC)
Feedback
[edit]I thought overall your article was well worded and contained a good about of clear description and detail. In addition to the feedback you have received from others I have some suggestions about information that could be added in several sections. Under Description and Identification I think it would be helpful to have a few sentences or even a subsection about the sexual dimorphism between males and females or the physical differences based on rank. I would really have loved to see more information and subsections under colony cycle. While you state that they are swarm founding wasps with several queens information about the different stages of colony formation or the timing would have been useful. Under Behavior you wrote about the basics of Dominance Hierarchy including morphological differences in the queen. Going in to more specific about the reproductive (or other ) rights that are afforded to queens would be helpful. Also additional information over competition between females to have access to these rights would be interesting. Is it only size determined? Is it the first to emerge from hibernation thus giving her more time to grow? Additionally, under Diet I would be interested to learn more about their hunting practices if such research exists. In addition to these comments I went through and linked some key words (such as allometry) to other articles so that you article might get more traffic. Additionally I noticed that some of your sentences are a bit short and just make the article read a bit choppy. Expanding or linking these sentences might make it flow better. Hope these suggestions help. Akinjenn (talk) 04:21, 24 October 2014 (UTC)
General
[edit]I made a few changes to the article, such as fixing minor grammatical errors, italicizing the title, and changing Protonectarina sylveirae to P. sylveirae after the first occurrence of the full name. The section headers were also changed so that only the first word is capitalized, and the direct links were removed if pages did not exist for them, such as for Protopolybia, diphasic, Richardson’s gland, and Epinonini. Lastly, direct links were added to words, such as neotropical, cellulose, and ecosystem. The article as a whole covered a wide variety of topics and gave a good amount of detail. It would be nice to have some more information, however, such as the colony cycle. Mayxac (talk) 00:49, 18 October 2014 (UTC)
Distribution and habitat
[edit]It would be beneficial to vary the sentence structure in this section. Many of the sentences begin with “the” and this can become monotonous to the reader. Also, are all the nests cylindrical, because it seems as though the average nest is smaller and the cylindrical nests are larger. Mayxac (talk) 00:49, 18 October 2014 (UTC)
Colony cycle
[edit]Why and when do new colonies start? When do the new workers emerge? How long does it take to grow from an egg to an adult? How long do colonies live for? Mayxac (talk) 00:49, 18 October 2014 (UTC)
Effects of pesticides
[edit]I am not sure if the Protonectarina is supposed to be in the sentence, “such as Protonectarina the coffee-eating moth” Mayxac (talk) 00:49, 18 October 2014 (UTC)
Recommendations
[edit]1. Linking words to other Wikipedia pages
- a. Under the section “Behavior,” some of the words that you linked do not have Wiki pages. Make sure to check if words you link have pages to start with. If the word you want to link isn’t the exact word of the page, you can still link the word to that page. For example take the word terga. The Wiki page has it as tergum. Then you put the “word on the Wiki page” first followed by “|” and then “the word you used.” Lastly, put double brackets around that.
- b. I would suggest linking more words to Wikipedia pages. For example. in the “dominance hierarchy” and “ovarian development” section, no words are linked.
2. Vary your sentence structure
- a.Under the “distribution and habitat” section, the first three sentences all start with “The…” I would recommend varying your sentence structure so your article does not become dull and disengaging.
3. Grammar errors
- a. Under “colony cycle,” there is an error in subject verb agreement in this sentence: “Protonectarina sylveirae colonies are typically large, which produces the need for behavioral specialization.”
4. Need more information in sections
- a. Some of your sections have very minimal information. For example, “colony cycle” consists of only two sentences. Try to find more sources if you can to complement what you already have right now.
5. General
- a. Overall, this was an interesting article to read. It was well written and concise with very few grammatical errors.
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