Talk:Promos (The Office)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Ed! (talk · contribs) 00:54, 25 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"The office is excited to see promos for the upcoming documentary "The Office: An American Workplace."" -- Some more background might be needed here. Maybe change to: "The office is excited to see promos for the upcoming documentary "The Office: An American Workplace," which will consist of the daily footage of them that has been compiled over the past nine years."
" However, many of the workers are dismayed to learn just how much of their activities have been recorded, and how much of their conversations the microphones picked up." -- Some examples might be good, such as Angela and Dwight's affair. Worth a mention here.
"She does talk to Brian, primarily to talk about her recent troubles with Jim" -- Something wrong with this sentence.
Plot should be expanded with a line or two about Jim and Pam's ongoing trouble, especially the events toward the end of the episode.
The lead mentions Athlead but does not explain what it is. Maybe add this in at the plot section.
"after some arguing, jointly call Angela's husband Sen. Robert Lipton to inform him that the documentary will probably out him and reveal that Angela slept with Dwight." -- First, note the actor who plays Lipton, second, maybe explain when the affair happened.
"The title of the in-series documentary, The Office: An American Workplace, is the name given to the series itself when it was broadcast in the UK to differentiate it from the British version of the show." -- I don't think I understand. So "The Office: An American Workplace" was the name of the UK version aired in the UK?
Other way around. It's the name of the American version when it aired in the UK.--Gen. Quon (Talk) 01:26, 25 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]
One duplicate link (Ryan Howard) but no dab links and no problems with external links.
Image appears to be properly licensed. No problems with stability or neutrality.

Placing the article on hold pending fixes. —Ed!^(talk) 01:12, 25 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I think I got everything. How does it look now?--Gen. Quon (Talk) 01:26, 25 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Great work! Passing GA. —Ed!^(talk) 12:16, 25 April 2013 (UTC)[reply]