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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Nominator: MSincccc (talk · contribs) 09:15, 2 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: Tim O'Doherty (talk · contribs) 17:35, 4 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]


Prose:

  • "Charles III" but "Queen Elizabeth II" - pick one

 Done

  • "then known as Duke and Duchess of Cambridge" - they weren't just known as the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, they were the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge: just "then Duke and Duchess of Cambridge" is fine.

 Done

  • "Prince George was born on 22 July 2013 in St Mary's Hospital, London, at 16:24 BST, during the reign of his paternal great-grandmother Elizabeth II, as the first child of Prince William and Catherine, then known as Duke and Duchess of Cambridge" - this sentence traipses on a bit too much: "Prince George was born at 16:24 BST on 22 July 2013 in St Mary's Hospital, London, during the reign of his paternal great-grandmother Elizabeth II. He was the first child of Prince William and Catherine, then Duke and Duchess of Cambridge. His birth was announced by press release..."

 Done

  • "new-born" - "newborn"

 Done

  • "Celebrations were staged for his birth" - "for his birth" is strange, could probably get rid: "Celebrations were staged".

 Done

  • "by Justin Welby, Archbishop of Canterbury" -> "by the Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby"

 Done

  • "his family relocated to Kensington Palace in 2014" - when in 2014? If it's in the latter portion of the year it isn't really in George's "first months".

It's said that George spent his first months at Bodorgan Castle before moving to Kensington Palace sometime in 2014.

  • "Then Australian Prime Minister Tony Abbott" -> "The then-

Australian prime minister, Tony Abbott"  Done

  • You can merge paragraphs 1, 2 and 3 of Upbringing

 Done

  • "George took part in his great-grandmother Queen Elizabeth II" - you've told us who his great-grandmother is.

 Done

  • "was succeeded by George's grandfather as King Charles III" - strange phrasing: "was succeeded by George's grandfather, who took on the regnal name Charles III" would be longer, but neater.

 Done

  • "George served as a page of honour" - "He" is all that's needed, and breaks up four successive sentences beginning with "George".

 Done

  • "In the British satirical sketch programme Newzoids, George was" - this comma can be removed.

 Done

  • "of both Queen Elizabeth II" - "Elizabeth" is fine, you don't need the full title.

 Done

  • "cameo appearance from Prince George" - "George" will do.
  • "(voiced by showrunner Gary Janetti)" - this can be removed: we haven't got who voiced him in Newzoids and people can click the link if they want to see the cast.

 Done

  • "life difficult both for his family and for the British monarchy" -> "life difficult for his family" should be fine: unless he's damaging the institution of monarchy in the show, the two are essentially the same.

 Done

  • "the first series drew criticism for satirising children" - children in general, or younger royals, or just George? What does the source say?

 Done Source says- "...has drawn criticism for satirizing the royal children and especially its take on 8-year-old Prince George, who is portrayed as entitled and conniving."

Sources:

  • Some have quotes, some don't

 Done Removed the unnecessary ones but retained a few like the one pertaining to his godparents.

  • Paywalled sources need the "subscription" parameter

 Done

  • Inconsistent capitalisation in article titles

 Done


Images:

  • Seem fine to me.

Tim O'Doherty (talk) 17:35, 4 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Well, I have taken care of the prose. I will take a final look at it tomorrow. Thanks for taking it up by the way. Regards and have a great day. MSincccc (talk) 17:54, 4 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Well @Tim O'Doherty, I've addressed your comments for improving the article. You're welcome to take another look to verify my claims. Thanks a lot once again for reviewing it. Regards MSincccc (talk) 05:03, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
The ref titles still need work. Tim O'Doherty (talk) 14:28, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Could you please be a little more specific? I would greatly appreciate it. Regards and faithfully yours MSincccc (talk) 15:45, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
The article titles in the refs need to be standardised per MOS:TITLECONFORM. Eg, in ref 5, "A Future Monarch is Born" should be "A future monarch is born", 36's "Winnie-the-Pooh Meets Queen Elizabeth II (and Prince George) in New Release" to "Winnie-the-Pooh meets Queen Elizabeth II (and Prince George) in new release". There are still paywalled sources not marked as such and some of the prose comments (merging paragraphs being one that sticks out) haven't been addressed either. Tim O'Doherty (talk) 15:50, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
 Done @Tim O'Doherty You're welcome to have another look at the article. Thanks for your suggestions. Regards MSincccc (talk) 16:29, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good so far, although The Telegraph is also a paywalled source. I might do a source-to-text-integrity spotcheck later. Tim O'Doherty (talk) 16:44, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
@Tim O'Doherty Well The Telegraph citations I found were accessible. I think it is because not all articles are solely meant for the subscribers. Looking forward to a positive result by tomorrow. I hope you are doing great both in mind and body. Regards MSincccc (talk) 17:23, 5 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
I'm looking forward to your spot check for source-to-text integrity @Tim O'Doherty. Please let me know if any further changes are needed. Regards MSincccc (talk) 08:34, 6 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Spotcheck

[edit]

Numbers picked at random:

  • 9 checkY
  • 10 ☒N - neither of the sources cited seem to mention Bodorgan Hall
  • 11 - Ditto
  • 16 checkY
  • 17 checkY
  • 26 checkY
  • 32 checkY
  • 33 checkY
  • 36 checkY
  • 41 checkY

Just the issue of Bodorgan Hall to be resolved then. Cheers, Tim O'Doherty (talk) 14:41, 6 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]

 Done MSincccc (talk) 16:55, 6 April 2024 (UTC)[reply]
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.