Talk : Piano Quartet (Schumann)/GA1

I’m unclear what to his reception of Schubert means here.

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– Reworded intforce (talk) 13:32, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I would amend his second piano trio to 'Schubert’s second piano trio', for the sake of clarification.

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it was his most notable accomplishment – it needs to be clear we are talking about Schumann, and not Schubert.

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Red link any compositions by Schumann not already linked.

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Amend one-hundred thaler to '100 thalers' (linked).

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a "remarkably polished work for someone who was as yet without formal training in composition" is followed by 2 citations—it needs to clearer whose words are being quoted.

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the work remained unpublished – as 4 different works are mentioned in this paragraph, I would amend this to ‘Schumann’s E♭ major quartet remained unpublished’.

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substantial chamber music – substantial in quantity or size?

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– Reworded intforce (talk) 13:32, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Consider linking Clara Schumann In the image caption.

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– Reworded intforce (talk) 13:32, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

dubbed his "chamber music year" – by who, and from when?

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– Reworded intforce (talk) 13:32, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

in September and October – the prose appear to say that the work was completed over the 2 months, I would make it clearer that it took months to write. Ditto in October and November.

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– Reworded and expanded intforce (talk) 13:32, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Schumann's – amend to Schumanns’.

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in a private recital – imo ‘at a private recital’ is better.

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The public premiere, as I believe premieres are not held in private, public can removed.

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Include the instruments each performer played (as in the infobox).

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Refs 7 and 8 should be swapped round.

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According to this, the picture of Clara, dated 1840, was made before she was married, so the caption should read 'Clara Wieck'.

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Ref 2 (Dav 1997) doesn’t appear to mention Schubert’s 2nd piano trio on p. 246.

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– Fixed page intforce (talk) 13:42, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Ref 7a doesn’t appear to mention who the work was dedicated to.

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– Fixed ref intforce (talk) 13:42, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

More comments to follow. The list of comments seems to be getting very long, but many points are minor, and anyway the review gives me a good excuse to listen to hours of Schumann's chamber music, as if I needed one. Amitchell125 (talk) 18:51, 3 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

1.1 Relationship to the Piano Quintet

Who are John Daverio, Ulrich Leisinger and James Keller?

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– intforce (talk) 14:04, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Link E♭ major (E-flat major); consider linking strings (String quartet).

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– intforce (talk) 14:04, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

the addition of a viola adds density to the ensemble's middle range – readers unfamiliar with the terms 'density' and 'middle range' might need some help here.

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– Rewritten intforce (talk) 14:04, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

There are 10 quoted phrases in this small section, which is too many. Most can be edited out by paraphrasing the sources instead of quoting them.

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– Rewritten intforce (talk) 14:04, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

2.1 Sostenuto assai – Allegro ma non troppo

Link Beethoven; dominant seventh (Dominant seventh chord); subject (Subject (music)); tonic (Tonic (music); coda (Coda (music)); themes (Theme (arts)).

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– Themes links to Subject (music) intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

the dominant G minor – presumably 'dominant' (Dominant (music)) and 'G minor' need to be linked separately.

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– intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

A minor point, but I believe bars 13 and 17 should have staccato dots above the notes.

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– Good catch. Also fixed a wrong note in the penultimate bar. intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

To verify the excellent images you produced using Dorico, the source for each one needs to be added to its own WikiCommons page.

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– intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

What is a 'chordal texture'?

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– A texture consisting of chords. Since texture is already linked, I've added a link to chord. intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

What do abbreviations such as 'mm. 13f' stand for?

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– Measures 13 following, similar to how you would write pp. 23f (pages 23 following). I've added a tooltip. intforce (talk) 14:27, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

2.2 Scherzo: Molto vivace – Trio I – Trio II

The link for Scherzo is a general link about scherzos, i.e. it doesn’t lead to where you expect it to and should be removed.

Needs clarification; scherzo links to the article on the musical scherzo, which also covers scherzos as movements of larger works. intforce (talk) 10:46, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

You're right, it's fine as it is. Amitchell125 (talk) 13:34, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Link Molto vivace (Tempo#Basic_tempo_markings); staccato; keys (Key (music)).

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– Linked Glossary of music terminology at the beginning of the section intforce (talk) 10:46, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

The remarks made in the first sentence sound subjective (how do you define exuberance in music?). It might be a good idea to say whose ideas these are.

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– Reworded. Exuberance is a term frequently used in literature to describe the music of Mendelssohn. intforce (talk) 10:46, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Who was Heine (his full name and occupation are both needed here)?

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– Full name added. Heine was one of the most famous writers in German literature. intforce (talk) 10:46, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

a "thoroughly Schumannesque series of sustained, syncopated chords in contrasting registers" – could this not be paraphrased? (I find WP:QUOTE very useful when tiptoeing through this minefield).

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– intforce (talk) 10:46, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

2.3 Andante cantabile

In the coda - unlink coda, as it has already been linked at the top of the section.

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Who was Basil Smallman?

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"surpassing lyricism", deeply romantic and song-like – whose opinion is this?

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It has been called the highlight of the work, featuring "one of the most beautiful cello themes" of the Romantic period – by whom?

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There are imo too many musical illustrations provided for this movement. The first variation is surely too similar to the cello’s theme to warrant being included here, and I would consider limiting the total number included to illustrate the movement to two.

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– Reformatted as table with collapsible images. (Per WP:COLLAPSE, table cells can be made collapsible if the content is purely supplementary, as the illustrations are here)intforce (talk) 12:03, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Link transpositions (Transposition (music)).

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General points to make about the article from WP:MOSMUSIC: 1. “Large images giving segments of music or depicting features of music should be displayed in thumbnails on the left or center of the page at 550px for visibility.”; 2. “Use an informative and concise caption and alternative text for each image.”;3. Generic movement titles (such as tempo markings or terms like minuet and trio) are capitalized with a single initial capital—that is, only the first word is capitalized—and are not italicized.
Amend final fourteen measures to ‘final 14 measures’,

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with a luscious cello solo – who says it is luscious?

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More to follow. AM

2.4 Finale: Vivace

Link exposition (Exposition (music)); development (Musical development); A♭ major (A-flat major); recapitulation (Recapitulation (music)).

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– intforce (talk) 12:07, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

The finale – check the article for consistency in the way the movements are named (capital case or small case).

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– Consistent small case intforce (talk) 12:07, 5 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

More to follow. Amitchell125 (talk) 07:24, 4 April 2021 (UTC)[reply]

3 Reception and legacy

Remove the duplicate links romantic (Romantic music) and Brahms.

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Amend the public premiere to ‘the premiere’.

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Remove on 8 December 1844 (already stated in the text).

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Smallman notes should read ‘Smallman noted’, as the person has died. Ditto calls, recognizes.

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Delete Nonetheless (see MOS:OP-ED).

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a hundred years – ‘100 years’ (or ‘a century’).

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after Schumann needs to be more specific – does it mean after his death, after he stopped composing chamber music, or after he stopped composing altogether?

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Rephrase large keyboard ensembles, which is vague and so can be misread to mean different things to different readers.

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considerable importance – why considerable?

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of various backgrounds is redundant and should be edited out.

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Amend particularly those to 'particularly those composers'.

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