Talk:Phasmatodea/GA1
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Reviewer: Delldot (talk · contribs) 15:45, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
I will review this one, comments to follow soon. delldot ∇. 15:45, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Many thanks. Chiswick Chap (talk) 16:02, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
An excellent article. Well organized, comprehensive, well references, well illustrated, interesting. All image licenses check out. All of my comments are minor fixes around clarity of writing:
- Explain unfamiliar words (even if wikilinked) in the sentence (that way the reader doesn't have to leave your article to understand). Examples: cornified, Autotomy, ocelli, elaiosomes, bisexual, photoperiod, circumscription, sclerite
- Done these examples and some others. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- If there's a simpler synonym (or rewording to express the meaning of words like 'longitudinal', that would be preferable.
- The article frequently shifts from singular to plural in a disconcerting way, e.g.:
- They are born equipped with tiny compound eyes with a limited number of facets. As the insect grows...
- ...previously thought to be concentrated in the insect from its plant food sources. However, it now seems more likely that they manufacture their own defensive chemicals.
- The best known of the stick insects is the Indian or laboratory stick insect (Carausius morosus). These insects grow
- Done, though its tricky sometimes. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Unclear sentence: This chemical spray variation also corresponds with regionally specific color form populations in Florida which also have distinct behaviors. What are 'color form populations'?
- Rewritten. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Confusingly long sentence: By lowering the net production of early successional plants by consuming them and then augmenting the nutrients in the soil available to later successional plants through defecation, the walking stick ensures the tendency of early successional plants to swiftly immobilize soil nutrients in light gaps does not stymie new substantial growth and the recycling of the tropical forest.
- Rewritten. That incomprehensible sentence predated our involvement in the article. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- This doesn't need to be dealt with before passing GA, but it might be worth thinking about expanding the As pets and In art sections or incorporating them elsewhere in the article since they're stubby.
- I've merged the short sections for now. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:08, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
Overall really excellent work, I have no major concerns. All of these comments should be pretty quick fixes. If you disagree with any of them or of the edits I made we can discuss. delldot ∇. 17:21, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you. user:Cwmhiraeth and I will look at these comments as soon as we can. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:02, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking on the review. I think we have dealt with all your comments. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Excellent work, I have no complaints. delldot ∇. 20:07, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks for taking on the review. I think we have dealt with all your comments. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 19:37, 21 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you for your review and comments. Cwmhiraeth (talk) 05:18, 22 October 2015 (UTC)
- Thank you. user:Cwmhiraeth and I will look at these comments as soon as we can. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:02, 21 October 2015 (UTC)