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Talk:Owls (album)/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 13:53, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Will take this on; first review for you in a while! --K. Peake 13:53, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

[edit]
  • Replace hlist with bullet points per Template:Infobox album
  • "debut studio album of" → "debut studio album by"
  • Independent label introduction is not needed here when you provide this in the body
  • "Owls is an" → "The album is an"
  • "Pavement and Captain Beefheart." → "Pavement, and Captain Beefheart."
  • Start a new para at the critical reception part
  • "noted its influences from the members' other bands while some others" → "noted influence from the members' other bands, while others"
  • Add a sentence after critical reception mentioning the album being ranked as one of the best emo albums by Rolling Stone
  • "The album was promoted" → "It was promoted"

Background and production

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Turns out he has a page at Victor Villarreal; swapped the link to that instead. Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • Pipe Sam Zurick to Make Believe (band)
  • "In September that year," → "In September 2000,"
  • "with Mike Kinsella and" should this be "with the Kinsellas" per the source?
I thought Mike Kinsella wasn't a member of Joan of Arc until later on (when he actually was at the time of this album, I'm mistaken). Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • [1] should solely be at the end of the last sentence
  • "met with a" → "was met with a"
  • [1] does not mention those sources calling it unlistenable
  • "and The Chicago Tribune would" → "and the Chicago Tribune would"
  • "in Japan before" → "in Japan, before"
  • Introduction of "the band's debut album" is not needed here when it is provided in the lead
  • Pipe mastered to Mastering (audio)

Composition

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Had to remove this since I removed the Portland Mercury ref. Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "bounced between plucked single-notes" → "went between plucked notes" because it does not say anywhere that they are single
Same as above. Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • "is similar to his" → "was described as similar to his"
  • "and anchor Tim Kinsella's" → "and accompany Tim's" per MOS:SAMESURNAME
  • "The first tracks" → "The first two tracks"
  • "include percussion such as bongos and tambourine." → "include bongos and tambourine." since these are the only instruments sourced
  • "Kinsella sings about heredity and marriage while" → "Tim Kinsella sings about heredity and marriage, while"
  • Add the year of "Who Goes Nazi?"
  • "a math rock song with" → "a math rock song, with"
  • "the record's musical forms;" → "the musical forms of Owls;"
  • "vocal melodies and Kinsella's" → "vocal melodies, and Kinsella's"
  • "refer to Tim and Mike Kinsella's cousin" → "refer to Tim and Mike's cousin" per us already knowing they have the same surname

Release and reception

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Promotion and touring

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  • Retitle to Promotion, as touring is a form of this
  • "was announced in" → "became public in"
  • Remove independent label introduction and wikilink for Jade Tree
  • Wikilink pre-order
  • "July 31 the same year." → "July 31 of the same year."
  • "the group embarked" → "the band embarked"
  • "After the tour was completed," → "After the tour ended,"
  • Move [8] to after the comma instead since refs should follow punctuation
  • "in October 2002[22] and disbanded" → "in October 2002[22], before disbanding"

Critical response

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  • Retitle to Reception
  • "He said Tim Kinsella's" → "He said Kinsella's"
  • "Cleveland Scene writer Brian Baker" → "The Cleveland Scene writer Brian Baker"
  • "wrote Kinsella was "warbling in" → "wrote Kinsella warbles "in"
  • Wikilink CMJ New Music Monthly to itself per MOS:LINK2SECT
  • Mention the full name of Stylus Magazine since it is not a publication where magazine is in brackets
  • "and said the nonsensical lyrics" → "and noted the nonsensical lyrics"
  • "at times" but with" → "at times", but with"
  • the A.V. Club → The A.V. Club, as "the" is part of the publication's name
  • ""orphan" list, which" → ""orphan" list for the 2000s, which"
  • "list of the" → "2016 list of the"
  • Pipe Vulture to Vulture.com

Track listing

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  • Good

Personnel

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  • Good

References

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The publication is listed at WP:ALBUM/SOURCE. Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • Remove or replace ref 14 since it is a bi-weekly tabloid and does not have many staff members
  • Are you sure ref 15 is reliable; the staff seems to be quite low?
They have a large amount of writers listed here and on the various print editions (the latter is a little annoying as they're listed on separate pages as opposed to all being on one page). Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
  • Ref 16 needs to work as a citation so clicking on it directs down to the source
  • Stylus → Stylus Magazine on ref 24
  • Pipe Vulture to Vulture.com on ref 28 per MOS:LINK2SECT
  • Wikilink CMJ New Music Monthly
[edit]
  • Good

Final comments and verdict

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@Kyle Peake: Made the changes. Yeepsi (talk) 18:20, 21 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
@Yeepsi: ✓ Pass now, only did some very brief copy editing and the sources you provided are acceptable now. --K. Peake 07:54, 22 November 2021 (UTC)[reply]
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