Talk:Out Loud (song)/GA2
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GA Review
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Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 08:01, 5 July 2019 (UTC)
Last few reviews have taken a while to get proper responses to for reasons that you can see if you look on the discussions. I will get to doing this one today, hoping there's not similar issues. --Kyle Peake (talk) 08:01, 5 July 2019 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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Infobox and lead
[edit]- Add 2017 as the recorded year as the first section mentions how work began in July
- "independently released on September 6, 2017 as her debut single." → "independently released for digital download on September 6, 2017 as her debut single."
- "The lyrics of "Out Loud"," → "The lyrics of the track,"
- "been described as emotive, discussing on themes" → "been described as emotive. They discuss on the themes"
- "They are inspired" → "They were inspired"
- "was received with mixed reviews" → "was met with mixed reviews"
- "critics who argued over its quality" → "critics, who argued over the track's quality"
- "was released onto Hanna's" → "was uploaded to Hanna's"
- "October 18, 2017, featuring her" → "October 18, 2017. The visual features her"
- Remove ref 1 from the lead as that is described in the body
- Record chart should be targeted instead of record charts
- "number 47 in Scotland" → "number 47 on the Scottish Singles Chart"
- "among others." → "among others in 2017." as you should list the year it charted in
- "the singer performed "Out Loud" live" → "the singer performed it live"
- This should remain as readers may be confused by what is meant with the "it" since the preceding few lines delve on the charts.
Background and composition
[edit]- "It was written by" → "The song was written by"
- "YouTube channel in which" → "YouTube channel, during which"
- "In a Billboard" → "In an interview with Billboard"
- "and are inspired by" → "and were inspired by"
- Not sure if the "one-off promotion" info belongs in the comp para, maybe the background para or promotion section?
- I think is works here since the book is mentioned for the first time here because of the lyrics inspiration.
Reception
[edit]- "was received with mixed reviews" → "was met with mixed reviews"
- "likened it" → "likened the song"
- I literally say "song" the line before. This works in my opinion.
- "well, that's kind of the point."[1]" → "well, that's kind of the point".[1]"
- "It further peaked at number 47 in Scotland" → "It further peaked at number 47 on the Scottish Singles Chart"
- "appeared on download charts in the United Kingdom and Canada" → "appeared at numbers 90 and 39 on download charts in the United Kingdom and Canada"
- "as well as on the Hitseekers chart" → "as well as at number six on the Hitseekers chart"
Promotion
[edit]- Put the music video info first and retitle Music video and promotion
- "was uploaded onto" → "was uploaded to"
- "that of Maya Rudolph" → "that of American actress Maya Rudolph"
- "as the video cuts" → "as the visual cuts" the video uses are too close to each other
- "in which she" → "in which the singer"
Track listing
[edit]- Good
Charts
[edit]- Good
Release history
[edit]- Territory → Country
- Add a ref column
- WikiLink Independent
References
[edit]- Archive all of these
- The tool still doesn't work (at least for me).
- Cite multiple iTunes stores for ref 2 to verify it was various
- WikiLink ref 14 to Australian Recording Industry Association
Final thoughts and verdict
[edit]
On hold for now, fix the issues within a week. Kyle Peake (talk) 10:40, 5 July 2019 (UTC)
- @Kyle Peake: Hi and thank you very much for your review. I've solved all your comments apart from where noted. Greetings; Cartoon network freak (talk) 15:43, 6 July 2019 (UTC)
Looks good, will gladly ✓ Pass this! --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:47, 6 July 2019 (UTC)