Talk:Our Children, Ourselves/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Ruby2010 talk 18:37, 9 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

I will review. Ruby2010 talk 18:37, 9 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Who is Dan O'Shannon in relation to the series? A producer? Writer? He has no article page, so defining his role with the series would be useful.
Per the peer review, it might be useful to add Mitchell and Cameron are in a relationship in the lead for the casual reader (Mitchell (Jesse Tyler Ferguson) runs into an ex-girlfriend while out with boyfriend Cameron (Eric Stonestreet).
Provide a wikilink to Alex and the other characters in the lead and plot sections (like List of Modern Family characters#Alex Dunphy
At the Dunphy house, Phil (Ty Burrell) and Claire (Julie Bowen) become worried that Alex (Ariel Winter) is studying too much and try to get her to take a break and eventually have to force her to do so. Needs better prose.
The production section still needs further expansion. I realize finding appropriate sourcing can be difficult, so until the season 2 DVD special features come out, I suppose it will have to do.
...who co-wrote the episode "Airport 2010"[2] Needs period at end.
...comparing it to "every episode of Three’s Company ever."[12] Teti ultimately gave the episode a C+.[12] Don't need to cite reference twice (remove first citation).
The reception section still seems a little short. Perhaps you could find another review or two to lengthen it? Here's the Entertainment Weekly review.
Looking at the peer review, the user made a helpful point about the references' publishers. All the sources need appropriate publishers (such as Microsoft). Also, TV Guide should be consistently cited (compare citation 6 versus 15).
Also suggested in the peer review was an image. Would you be able to find an appropriate image to use for the infobox? One would greatly improve the article.

Please respond to my suggestions or edit accordingly to make the fixes. I will place the article on hold for seven days while everything get sorted out. Thanks, Ruby2010 talk 19:03, 9 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Are you done with your edits? Please respond on this page when you are. Thanks, Ruby2010 talk 05:01, 10 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I believe I am doneNoD'ohnuts (talk) 15:32, 14 March 2011 (UTC)NoD'ohnuts[reply]

A few more minor tweaks:

If Dan O'Shannon is also a executive producer, indicate this in the lead.
Provide links to the characters' articles in the lead.
At the Dunphy house, Phil (Ty Burrell) and Claire (Julie Bowen) become worried that Alex (Ariel Winter) is studying too much and try to get her to take a break and eventually have to force her to do so. Seems like a run-on sentence. Either add punctuation, or split into two sentences.
The production section should be in chronological order (thus the casting information should be earlier in the section than the information about Obama's speech).

Just complete the suggestions you see above, and respond back on this page. Thanks, Ruby2010 talk 19:44, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Note: I notified the nominator the article will be on hold another four days for my comments to get looked at. Otherwise the article will be failed. Thanks, Ruby2010 talk 15:44, 17 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Is the current form of the article goodNoD'ohnuts (talk) 16:41, 20 March 2011 (UTC)NoD'ohnuts[reply]

No. You still need to provide links to the characters' articles in the lead (Phil, Claire etc). I fixed the production section myself. Just complete the character links and it will be good to go. Ruby2010 talk 19:48, 20 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

OK I believe it is now finished. NoD'ohnuts talk 02:08, 22 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

It now looks good to go. Pass for GA. Ruby2010 talk 02:12, 22 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]