Talk:Operation Berlin (Atlantic)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: FunkMonk (talk · contribs) 02:18, 22 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]

I'll have a look soon, my Faroese grandfather participated in some of these North Atlantic operations, and lost many relatives to German mines, so will be interesting. FunkMonk (talk) 02:18, 22 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
At first glance, I see a couple of duplinks, which can be highlighted with this script:[1]
- Whoops - all fixed Nick-D (talk) 11:06, 22 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Link names and terms in image captions?
- Linked. Nick-D (talk) 11:06, 22 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"were available at the start of the war in September 1939" What is meant by available?
- Ready for combat - tweaked Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"One of the roles the Kriegsmarine (German Navy) assigned to its warships in plans developed prior to the outbreak of World War II was attacking Allied merchant shipping on the high seas." This sentence is a bit of a mouthful, had to read it a few times to get it. Is there any way to simplify it?
- Yep, it's been bugging me as well. I've split it into a couple of sentences. Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Link Baltic Sea?
- Linked Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
You get to the invasion of Norway, and then Norwegian waters seem to be filled with British ships. I think you could maybe elaborate on when and under which circumstances the Brits supposedly surrounded Norway prior to the German invasion, because now you don't even state these ships were British. Readers might think these were Norwegian ships?
- I've adjusted the wording to clarify this. Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"forbade attacks on convoys escorted by British battleships" Why?
- As any significant damage from fighting them would require the operation to abandoned - added Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"unable to decyrpt" Decrypt, surely?
- Oops, yes Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
You link Kiel at second instead of first mention.
- Fixed Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"to conduct repair Gneisenau at Trondheim" Repair on/of?
- Fixed. Thank you for these further comments. Nick-D (talk) 07:22, 24 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"reinforce the patrols between Iceland and the Faroe Islands" Perhaps worth noting (or linking) they were both under Allied occupation at the time (as done with Norway and Denmark in regard to Germany)? There are articles for both occupations.
- Good idea - linked Nick-D (talk) 06:13, 25 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"received intelligence obtained from a military attaché" Of what nationality?
- The British naval attache in Sweden - added. Nick-D (talk) 06:13, 25 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
There is a larger version of the HMS Ramillies image with less intrusive watermarks, the border could be cropped:[2]
- Thanks I've uploaded it. Nick-D (talk) 06:13, 25 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
You sometimes spell out United Kingdom, other times just UK, could be consistent.
- Standardised on 'United Kingdom' Nick-D (talk) 06:13, 25 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"Coastal Command also redirected its patrols to the approaches to the Bay of Biscay without immediate success." I'm not entirely sure what this sentence means, the double "to the" is a bit confusing.
- Tweaked to be clearer Nick-D (talk) 05:54, 26 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The intro looks quite short for an article this length, I'd imagine there could at least be two paragraphs? For example a bit about the background and aftermath?
- Good point - expanded to three paras. Nick-D (talk) 11:06, 26 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
The article about Günther Lütjens has this info about the operation in the intro: "The operation was a tactical victory. It came to a close in March 1941, when the ships docked in German-occupied France after sailing some 18,000 miles; a record for a German battle group at the time." If this can be sourced, it would seem to be relevant in this article.
- There's no reference, and while I suspect that the claim is correct it's also a bit meaningless - individual German surface raiders and submarines made longer voyages during the war. Nick-D (talk) 05:54, 26 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Very nice fixes, I'll promote the article now. And thanks for the interesting subject! FunkMonk (talk) 14:16, 26 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]
- Thanks a lot for this review. Nick-D (talk) 23:11, 26 August 2021 (UTC)[reply]