Talk:No Angel (Beyoncé song)/GA2

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Calvin999 (talk · contribs) 09:52, 6 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I'm Calvin999 and I am reviewing this article.

I had a look at the previous nomination. DJ Booth is fine to use. I emailed them once and they provided me with their critics credentials.

Review

In the Info box, 2013 should have a semi-colon after it. The recording studio and the place should have a comma after each one
In the Info box, alphabetise the record labels.
There's no point linking Beyonce Knowles in the Info box, she is already linked at the top of the box and in the lead.
is a song by American singer Beyoncé from her fifth studio album, Beyoncé → is a song by American singer Beyoncé from her self-titled fifth studio album
You don't need a comma after Polachek's name
in its beat → Remove
that neither she, nor → Remove comma
generally provided favorable reviews for "No Angel",→ response to the song was mostly positive
however some of them criticized its placement on the album. → Why?
landscape shot of → landscape shots of
It features various landscape shot of the city and some of its famous places as well as close-up shots of many people, including ten Houston-based rappers → Bit long winded
Beyoncé is also seen lip-syncing the song throughout. → What do you mean by this? All singers lip-sync to the filming of their video. Unless she is holding a mic throughout?
songs consisting from → Remove 'consisting'
"No Angel" was written by James Fauntleroy, Beyoncé and Caroline Polachek, → You've ordered them differently here compared to the lead
recorded with guidance from → What do you mean by this?
I think I'd switch these two paragraphs around, it makes more sense to know how it cam about prior to the production process details
"No Angel" is a cascading → You're directly quoting here without using quotations marks. You either need to use quotations or paraphrase.
A distortion musical effect was also implemented in the song. → Such as?
The composition section reads a bit jarring and jilted. It's got too many short and stumpy successive sentences which makes it difficult to read as there is no flow
, nor an angel, → Remove
I'm not even half way and there are too many issues here. Just picking out something basic from further down, int he Credits section you've written Vocals production, when it's Vocal production (without the 's'). It's little things like grammar and sentence structure, which are frequent, which are letting this article down.
The Critical reception section is too dependant on quotations (WP:QUOTEFARM)
References don't need publisher parameters anymore

Summary

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria

Is it reasonably well written?
A. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:

B. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:
Is it factually accurate and verifiable?
A. Has an appropriate reference section:

B. Citation to reliable sources where necessary:

C. No original research:
Is it broad in its coverage?
A. Major aspects:

B. Focused:
Is it neutral?
Fair representation without bias:
Is it stable?
No edit wars, etc:
Does it contain images to illustrate the topic?
A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:

B. Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
Overall:
Pass or Fail:

Outcome

There are too may basic errors and mistakes in this article. There are multiple instances whereby I don't understand what you mean, and there are too many misuses of punctuation and grammar. I suggest a Peer Review to help you out with some things. I know this article has been nominated for a couple of months and this is not the outcome you was hoping for, but I can't pass an article which has so many errors in it. — Calvin999 18:23, 12 June 2015 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.