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Talk:Newport and Wickford Railroad and Steamboat Company/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.


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Nominator: Trainsandotherthings (talk · contribs) 00:36, 1 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: LunaEatsTuna (talk · contribs) 04:48, 23 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]


I will review this. Template:LunaEatsTunaSig (talk), posted at 04:48, 23 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Done; over to you! Template:LunaEatsTunaSig (talk), posted at 15:56, 25 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Oh, also, I just noticed a user left a message on this article's talk page regarding new sources they found. :) Template:LunaEatsTunaSig (talk), posted at 15:59, 25 May 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Yes, there was a discussion on my user talk page about the source, where I stated my belief that the clear majority of sources agree on 3.5 miles, so I did not feel comfortable changing the number based on just one source.
Ah I see – thank you for clearing that up. @Trainsandotherthings: are you finished with the editing? (I forgot to ask you to ping me once you finished). :3 ❧ LunaEatsTuna (talk), writing gibberish since 2017 – posted at 20:34, 5 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]
I am done editing for the moment @LunaEatsTuna:, do let me know if you have any further comments or suggestions or want to follow up on any existing review items. Trainsandotherthings (talk) 17:52, 6 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry for the wait – it looks great now! I really love the image additions, BTW. Pass. ❧ LunaEatsTuna (talk), staying at Hotel Wikipedia since 2017 – posted at 05:39, 10 June 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Da review:

Formation and construction
  • "chased out of town" – should probably be changed per WP:IDIOM, unless they were chased out of the actual town surrounding Wickford, in which case specify North Kingstown.
    The source says "Wickford turned out and fought it literally, the surveyors having been driven out of town by farmers armed with guns". I don't think the writing here is an idiom, I was paraphrasing the source.
  • "ship to Newport from west of" – should it not be "the west of"?
    I think this is grammatically correct as written - by west of Rhode Island I meant travelers predominantly from NYC.
  • "An all-rail trip meant traveling via" – I would reword this to avoid repetition with the prior sentence's "meant traveling".
    I decided to reword the previous sentence instead, replacing traveling with sailing.
  • I would combine the third and fourth paragraphs since they are both short but also definitely related enough.
    Sure, combined.
Independent operations
  • "In addition to passenger service, the railroad also provided freight service to Wickford's sole mill and several others along its route, plus mail to and from Newport" – try and reword "several others" since it sounds awkward in this sentence (like it might be referring to other mills, although it says Wickford only has one).
  • "included a grand total" > "included a total" – adding grand is not really necessary.
    Fair enough. Done.
Takeover by the New Haven and abandonment
  • "its fares to match its competition" – pedantic but I would do "its fares to match the competition" here since it sounds better than using its in such close succession.
    That's reasonable, changed as suggested.
  • I normally dislike doing this but I would start the second paragraph with "However, the Newport and Wickford's financial issues continued ..." to better connect it to the previous paragraph's final sentence.
    I'm not sure this connects with that sentence, as the end of the paragraph states the company entered receivership, which is a negative event.
  • "at the last minute" – I presume this is idiomatic which, if so, I would rephrase since it could be interpreted as having been at the actual last minute (unless it was? In which case maybe rephrase it to avoid confusion with the idiom).
    This is a figure of speech, yes. I rewrote the sentence and added a bit more information.
  • How about something like "The tracks to the dock at Wickford Landing were subsequently abandoned in 1938, with the remainder of the line retained as a freight branch serving local industries" in order to improve the flow?
    That works for me. Changed.
  • Probably subjective, but I would recommend "still visible as of 2012" to be a bit more specific.
    I added some specifics and mention of a train car from the railroad that has been preserved at a museum in Connecticut.
Station listing
  • In the wikitable, the Comments row leaves a lot of whitespace; how about a footnote next to Newport instead?
    I'd prefer not to remove the comments or move them elsewhere; I did add a comment to the table so it's more populated now.
Spotcheck
  • All good, passes checks I did on refs 1, 2, 8, 13 and 17.
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.