Talk:New York Cosmos (1970–1985)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: KnowIG (talk) 22:47, 11 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Quick Fail 1.The article completely lacks reliable sources – see Wikipedia:Verifiability.[2] N

2.The topic is treated in an obviously non-neutral way – see Wikipedia:Neutral point of view.[3]N

3.There are cleanup banners that are obviously still valid, including cleanup, wikify, POV, unreferenced or large numbers of fact, citation needed, clarifyme, or similar tags. (See also QF-tags.)N

4.The article is or has been the subject of ongoing or recent, unresolved edit wars.N

5.The article specifically concerns a rapidly unfolding current event with a definite endpoint. N

Prose When you first mention North American Soccer league, put in brackets it's short hand for what your callign it through the rest of the article.

Pelé joined the Cosmos on 10 June 1975 on a salary of $1.4 million per year, an enormous wage for an athlete at that time, equal to about $6 million in 2011. Problem there. Can't you just write in modern money or today's money saves you having to do a edit each year.

In an exhibition match televised nationwide and worldwide, he played the first half with the New York Cosmos and the second half with the team he had turned out for in Brazil, Santos. In an exhibition/friendly use whatever between the Cosmos and Santos Pele appeared for both sides, less clunky and clearer.

Meanwhile, Pelé's compatriot, former Brazil captain Carlos Alberto was signed, as well as Franz Beckenbauer, who had captained the 1974 FIFA World Cup-winning West German national team. Meanwhile shouldn't be there. And state the season they were signed for.

while the Cosmos attendances, regularly over 40,000, were by far the highest in the NASL. Put full stop in The average attendence for the Cosmos was 40,000 the highest in the NASL. Flows better.

After the retirement of Pelé, much of the progress that American soccer had made during his stay was lost. There was no star at the same level to replace him as the NASL's headline act. What year did Pele retire in.

Need refs for average attendence table. And refs for the honors table needed as well.

Head coaches need somemore references I think. I'll give the final three sections another read through but this is good. KnowIG (talk) 23:03, 11 March 2011 (UTC) Disambig links Fort Lauderdale Strikers And one dead link as well. Also I think that the dates don't need to be in the headings. KnowIG (talk) 23:08, 11 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Okay, all done. Thoughts? – Cliftonian^{the orangey bit} 00:04, 12 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Minor thing with the logos on the non free template you need to state who owns the logo, so the company who now owns the name and the badge need to go on it.

New York Yankees' Yankee Stadium. Comma needed in between the two.

A young Cosmos forward from Bermuda, Randy Horton, was named the league's Rookie of the Year after scoring 16 goals and 37 points, the most by any New York player. Rm the first part. Should be Randy Horton, from Bermuda, was named....

After moving to Hofstra Stadium in 1972, the Cosmos performed even more strongly, winning the league championship with a 2–1 victory over the St. Louis Stars. In 1972 the team moved to Hofstra Stadium where they won their first league title with a...

22 points from. How did he get points this is soccer not ice hockey or baseball :P

In their first year at their new base, they finished bottom of their division, and missed the play-offs. Last bit of sentence is redundent

thus far top-scored for the Cosmos in every season, was traded to the Washington Diplomats before the next campaign. Horton top scored for Cosmos in every season was traded.

He shared an unusual bond with Steve Ross of Warner, the ultimate controller of the Cosmos. Why unusual.

performance also improved. rm also.

However, the signing of Pelé by the Cosmos transformed. Rm however.

– and Werner Roth, a Yugoslavian-born US international defender. Rm or separate sentence.

years later on Pelé's insistence. Source

Head coaches section is ok as the table is sourced.

Ok 10 minor things, as I was tired when first reviewing so I reread everything and 3 sections which I just glanced at. Good to go for a GA when done. KnowIG (talk) 18:18, 12 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Still a disambig link and a dead link to sort. KnowIG (talk) 18:45, 12 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Okay, done. – Cliftonian^{the orangey bit} 00:01, 13 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

OK I'm passing. I made a minor change about the point reference, my fault cause I told you to put it in a place when I should have gone slightly high so i corrected. KnowIG (talk) 00:09, 13 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]