Talk:Muhammad VI of Granada/GA1
GA Review
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Reviewer: Amitchell125 (talk · contribs) 20:17, 1 September 2020 (UTC)
Happy to review this article.
Assessment
[edit]Summary
[edit]- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail:
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Lead section and infobox
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Geopolitical background
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Origin
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Where the following sections comment on information provided by Vidal Castro (i.e. his article on Muhammad VI), or Fernández-Puertas, it means I would include the information in the article.
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Rise to power
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Rule
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Downfall
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On hold
[edit]A really interesting article to work on! I'm placing it on hold for a week until 13 September to allow time for the points I have raised to be addressed. I'll check through the article again for any minor issues when we are nearer the end of the review. Regards, Amitchell125 (talk) 16:29, 5 September 2020 (UTC)
- Thank you Amitchell125 for your thorough feedback, which have resulted in many improvements in the article. I incorporated most of your suggestions, while at the same time trying to avoid unnecessary or undue details. I've responded to all of your points above, and explained when I disagree. Let me know if you have concerns about my responses, or if you have more feedback. HaEr48 (talk) 23:35, 6 September 2020 (UTC)
- I've accepted your points where you have disagreed, although I would perhaps include at least part of the quote I suggested, if only to give this ruler, of which so little is known, a voice. There are couple of comments left to address, but we are nearly there. Amitchell125 (talk) 08:29, 7 September 2020 (UTC)
- Amitchell125, responded to your remaining point above. As for the quote, I completely agree with you that it will add a much-needed voice, but the problem is it's very long (8 lines in the paper, though maybe in Wikipedia it can be less) and I can't think of a good way to cut it to, for example, under 50% of the original length, without losing the context. If you have an idea I am all ears. HaEr48 (talk) 04:05, 8 September 2020 (UTC)
- HaEr48 Consider replacing Ibn al-Khatib quoted that the chief of police (sahib al-shurta) of Granada as saying that the Sultan was once addicted to hashish, and by mentioning the places he had frequented Muhammad VI helped the police uncover illegal hashish rings. with this (or something similar): According to Ibn al-Khatib, he had an hashish addition. On being informed by his sahib-al-shurta (chief of police) that his people had abandoned all their vices, Muhammad enquired, “And the hashish, what about that?” and was told none had been found. He answered, “I would that were so! But go to the house of So-and-so and So-and-so ….” and then provided the addresses of all those whose gatherings he had previously attended.' Amitchell125 (talk) 06:50, 8 September 2020 (UTC)
- Amitchell125, Thanks, your suggestion is pretty good. I updated the article to something like that, let me know what you think! HaEr48 (talk) 04:18, 10 September 2020 (UTC)
- HaEr48 That looks fine, I'm pleased you added something. All the best, Amitchell125 (talk) 06:37, 10 September 2020 (UTC)
- Amitchell125, Thanks, your suggestion is pretty good. I updated the article to something like that, let me know what you think! HaEr48 (talk) 04:18, 10 September 2020 (UTC)
- HaEr48 Consider replacing Ibn al-Khatib quoted that the chief of police (sahib al-shurta) of Granada as saying that the Sultan was once addicted to hashish, and by mentioning the places he had frequented Muhammad VI helped the police uncover illegal hashish rings. with this (or something similar): According to Ibn al-Khatib, he had an hashish addition. On being informed by his sahib-al-shurta (chief of police) that his people had abandoned all their vices, Muhammad enquired, “And the hashish, what about that?” and was told none had been found. He answered, “I would that were so! But go to the house of So-and-so and So-and-so ….” and then provided the addresses of all those whose gatherings he had previously attended.' Amitchell125 (talk) 06:50, 8 September 2020 (UTC)
- Amitchell125, responded to your remaining point above. As for the quote, I completely agree with you that it will add a much-needed voice, but the problem is it's very long (8 lines in the paper, though maybe in Wikipedia it can be less) and I can't think of a good way to cut it to, for example, under 50% of the original length, without losing the context. If you have an idea I am all ears. HaEr48 (talk) 04:05, 8 September 2020 (UTC)
- I've accepted your points where you have disagreed, although I would perhaps include at least part of the quote I suggested, if only to give this ruler, of which so little is known, a voice. There are couple of comments left to address, but we are nearly there. Amitchell125 (talk) 08:29, 7 September 2020 (UTC)
Passing
[edit]Passing now, pending a last check through for punctuation, etc. I'll leave the decision about the quote up to you. Thank you for your part in the review—a very enjoyable process, as before—and congratulations on producing a high quality article.Amitchell125 (talk) 06:56, 8 September 2020 (UTC)
- Amitchell125, thank you very much for the review and for passing it. Indeed I enjoyed the review process too, and as you see, it resulted in many improvements to the article. HaEr48 (talk) 04:20, 10 September 2020 (UTC)