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Talk:Montauk Point land claim/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman Operation Big Bear 23:05, 30 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Jeffwang

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I don't like the intro; it should have more info about the aftermath. I will put this on hold. --J (t) 03:08, 9 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

The requirement is to review Good Article Nominations against WP:WIAGA, not against personal likes and/or dislikes. Is this intended to be a serious review? Pyrotec (talk) 10:04, 10 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Regardless, I have added more about the aftermath to the lead. Savidan 06:06, 12 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Sorry, that wasn't a personal matter, it was serious. I will now put this back on track. --J (t) 03:06, 17 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]
OK. I suspect that what you meant above was that the intro was not compliant with WP:WIAGA clause 1(b) in respect of WP:Lead. Pyrotec (talk) 07:31, 17 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Is this review going to be continued? Ideally it should have been completed already. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 05:12, 30 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Review

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  • "Chief Wyandank Pharaoh, nephew of the famous Stephen Talkhouse who died in the same year (1879) that the tribe lost the last remaining vestige of their territory in the New York state courts," famous isn't needed here, plus the death-tribe connection sounds tangential on the surface; if it's not make it clearer.
  • "Circa, 1880" rm comma after circa
  • Add (LIRR) to the first use of Long Island Rail Road, this way it's easily followed. Took a bit to remember what LIRR was without it.
  • "or to have individual members bring the suit" or have sounds a bit better here.
  • "The Special Termsustained" add space
  • "and affirmed the Special Term, on" no comma needed here
  • "Road.[7] an area of 4,200 acres" An
  • "the Montauks were not longer a tribe" no longer
  • Allen Carruthers doesn't need to be linked twice; he is within three sentences.
  • Not sure why the "at" in the refs for page numbers is there. The page numbers after it is obviously where the cite would be; remove all those extra ats.

I'll put the article on hold and will pass it when the issues are fixed. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 03:39, 1 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for reviewing. Except as otherwise noted, I think you'll find these issues resolved. Savidan 03:09, 2 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Looks good now, so I'll pass the article as a GA. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 15:51, 2 July 2012 (UTC)[reply]
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