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Talk:Merry-Go-Round (Ayumi Hamasaki song)/GA2

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GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 06:26, 23 December 2016 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

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  • with a rap → featuring an uncredited rap
  • and Avex Entertainment Inc. worldwide. → Insert the "worldwide" after "It was released"
  • A majority of them → The majority of them
  • vocal performance. Some also highlighted → vocal performance, whilst others also highlighted

Infobox

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Background and composition

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  • Japanese publication Natalie.mu → Japanese publication Natalie
  • would release a new → avoid the word "new"
  • and would serve as Hamasaki's → state "the singer's" here, as you've already used her name before
  • The track was written by → The recording was written by (word repetition)
  • The song was composed by Japanese → It was composed by Japanese (word rep.)
  • with minor phrases → containing minor phrases
  • It is nowhere stated that Verbal had an uncredited appearance

Release

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  • The CD and DVD format featured → use "incorporated" here for alternation
  • TeamAyu, which included → TeamAyu, and included
  • track list on both discs but featured a bonus interview by Hamasaki → track list on both discs alongside a bonus interview with Hamasaki
  • The digital EP included the same track list → You've used "featured the same track list" three full times; alternate here.
  • the singles same release date on → the single's release date on
  • and for Hamasaki's Countdown → and during Hamasaki's Countdown
  • for 2014, Avex Trax → in 2014, Avex Trax

Reception

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  • A staff member at Japanese → A staff member of Japanese
  • for her album Colours at CD Journal selected it → Remove "at CD Journal" here
  • the composition by Komuro → who's Komuro?
  • for following the electronic sound. → for portraying an electronic sound
  • "Feel the Love", it underperformed → replace "it" with "the track"
  • top spot since her single → replace "single" with "recording" for alternation
  • first week sales → first-week sales

Music videos and promotion

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  • You can simply rename this section to "Promotion"
  • for the single; one by Luis Hernandez, the second from Satoru Yokoyama → for the single by Luis Hernandez and Satoru Yokoyama, respectively
  • during a time lapse → during a time lapse are shown
  • unnamed man → unidentified man
  • entire video, and ends → entire video, which ends
  • For Yokoyama's video, scenes containing Verbal were only shot → For Yokoyama's video, only shots featuring Verbal were filmed
  • filmed, with additional → only filmed, alongside
  • and inside a neon-lit → and residing in a neon-lit
  • painting the unnamed man → remove "unnamed" and state "painting a man"
  • Ref 22 is faded to the text
  • before the albums release in July 2 → before the album's release on July 2

Track list and formats

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  • flawless ;)

Credits and personnel

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  • flawless ;)

Charts and sales

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  • flawless ;)

Release history

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Other stuff

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Copy-violation

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Images and others

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  • Image from the music video brings nothing to the article, so please remove it in accordance with Wikipedia's WP:IMAGE
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References

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  • As far as I checked them, the references do cover the assertations made in this article.
  • No dead links! Good job!

Outcome

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The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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