Talk:McLaren MP4-18/GA1

GA Review

Passed. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 04:39, 15 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Sammi Brie (talk · contribs) 06:04, 14 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:
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Some tweaks here and there. 7-day hold for X750. Ping me when done. Sammi Brie (she/her • t • c) 06:47, 14 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Sammi Brie I've given it a workover. Your point about testing, the August one, I slightly deviated to what I thought was a slightly better flowing sentence. Look forward to additional comments. Cheers X-750 _{List of articles that I have screwed over} 02:25, 15 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Copy changes

Lead

Could use a couple more sentences.

Background

stating that, "I think it [the F2002] is beatable." There should not be a comma here. Either... stating, "I think it [the F2002] is beatable." or {{stating that "I think it [the F2002] is beatable."}}
Ultimately, McLaren would finish behind Williams-BMW in the Constructor's championship, scoring only 65 points; 37 less than in the 2001 season and finishing 3rd, a place lower than in 2001. Capitalize Championship, change the semicolon to a dash (—), and use "third".
should "Leave I wouldn't capitalize the L here
Change colon after "The Race" to a comma
After the race, Dennis commented regarding the MP4-18 that, See above

Design

Alongside the Williams FW25 of that year, the twin-keel configuration was combined with a "waved wing", which acted similar to a diffuser, creating a low-pressure area below the wing, sucking the nose and the front end of the car to the ground. Reflow this sentence or split it to not have so many commas. Maybe Alongside the Williams FW25 of that year, the twin-keel configuration was combined with a "waved wing". In a similar manner to a diffuser, this setup created a low-pressure area below the wing, sucking the nose and the front end of the car to the ground.
FIA mandated hyphenate
He wrote that, See above. I'd do, He wrote, "...

Engine and transmission

saying that, See above
This allowed Mercedes to build an engine with a longer stroke, yet still rev as high as the Ferrari engine due to the increased elasticity of beryllium alloys, producing more power. Drop the first comma. User:Sammi Brie/Commas in sentences
On 6 October 1999, the FIA moved to ban beryllium from engines, taking effect 2001 onwards, I'd change the end to "engines beginning in 2001, ...".
nightmare, due to the fact that every; consider nightmare; every

Testing

At another test in Jerez, McLaren test driver Alexander Wurz suffered a large shunt, the cause of which was later determined to be floor delamination, the cause of which was never determined. the cause of the cause of... Reflow.
Wurz successfully tested the MP4-18 for 330 km (205 mi) in Austria, however when he came back into the pits it was determined MOS:HOWEVER. Should be "Austria; however, when he came back into the pits, it was determined..."
August, that "We've got a full test remove that

Legacy

Adrian Newey said that the MP4-19 was identical to the MP4-18, and in many ways it was, — Reflow to avoid comma stacking otherwise needed. "MP4-18; in many ways, it was, ..."

Source spot checks

1: "lack of pace"
7: Repository of quotes, some used in the article and all reproduced faithfully
9: "Newey adopted the twin keel feature in 2002 on the MP4-17. The twin-keel made its racing debut in Formula One the year before on the Sauber car, where it was introduced by designer Sergio Rinland." I read this as the Sauber car adopting twin-keel in 2001, not 2002; change
18: Mentions the mechanics "nightmare" item (translated from Dutch)
21: F1 Database. I take this at its word; I'd want to see better sources, but the site seems to have a lot of information generally and looks of decent quality.

Other

Archive references.
Images need alt text. Use |alt= in the infobox (yes, this is supported but not advertised).
Earwig comes up with some high numbers because of the quote sources, but I think the quotes are due and merited.

Review in progress

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.