Talk:Maureen O'Hara/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 20:39, 29 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

I think I should finish this tomorrow JAGUAR 20:39, 29 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Cheers Jaguar. If I was going to proceed to peer review/FAC after this I'd trim it by about 1000 words I think. The important thing is that it's comprehensive and readable though, it's OK for GA I think.♦ Dr. Blofeld 21:00, 29 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Same with Sinatra, I don't think size is a massive concern for GA but regardless, I'll try and help this get through FAC more smoothly. JAGUAR 21:10, 29 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Initial comments

"O'Hara began life as Maureen FitzSimons on Beechwood Avenue in the Dublin suburb of Ranelagh" - was she born in Beechwood Avenue or did she grow up there using that name?

Both I think.♦ Dr. Blofeld 10:34, 1 December 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"A tom boy, she enjoyed fishing in the River Dodder" - tomboy

Done.

"Though her family were shell shocked at her being given a contract so young" - not sure if 'shell shocked' sounds a little colourful here, I would change this to just 'shocked'?

Actually that was the word Malone used. I agree with you though so have changed.

"O'Hara made her screen debut in Walter Forde's Kicking the Moon Around (1938), though she didn't consider part of her filmography" - did not

Done.

"and O'Hara traveled across Ireland in celebration before arriving back in London" - travelled

I'm using American English

"she agreed to deliver one line in it as a favor to Richman" - favour

I'm using American English

"Montgomery attempted to make a pass for her during the production" - is this meant to be "pass at her"?

OK.

"having always seen herself as a tomboy and realizing that on screen" - realising

I'm using American English

There's a sudden break in the first paragraph in the The Queen of Technicolor section

Not sure what you mean?

There was a split in the paragraph so it appeared like: "Though O'Hara didn't think that McCrea was rugged enough for the part of William F. "Buffalo Bill" Cody,

and according to Malone gave her "little to work off","

But no worries, I fixed it! JAGUAR 14:29, 1 December 2015 (UTC)[reply]

"The film had actually been made in 1949 but wasn't released until 1952" - was not

Done.

"which was based on the true story of an old friend of Ford's, Frank Spig Wead" - should "Spig" be in quotes instead of italics?

Indeed.

References

Ref 285 is dead

On hold

This is an excellent article and I could find very few prose issues with it. The references all check out too. I didn't bother listing all of the American spellings in this article as there were more, but feel free to ignore them as I don't think it will be brought up in the FAC. Other than that, this is very well written! JAGUAR 19:58, 30 November 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Cheers, Jaguar, but it is actually intentionally written with American English spelling, as it's a Hollywood actress!♦ Dr. Blofeld 10:52, 1 December 2015 (UTC)[reply]

@Jaguar: I think we're done, just waiting for Ssven to sort out the ref.♦ Dr. Blofeld 21:50, 1 December 2015 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for addressing them! OK, I think I'll pass this now. I won't hold this back because of one broken link that is going to be fixed imminently. Well done on all the work put into this!

JAGUAR 21:56, 1 December 2015 (UTC)[reply]