Talk:Matar Matar/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: FunkMonk (talk · contribs) 01:48, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hi, I will review this article within the next few days. FunkMonk (talk) 01:48, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you, looking forward to reading you comments.

There is a problem with the images, because Commons needs "proof" of their license through an email. See here: http://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Commons:OTRS

Matar should have sent a declaration of consent email a while ago. I don't know why this didn't happen and I'm happy to remove images until then.

Alright, I have no problem if you reinsert some of thm now, but best is o course to wait for permission. You can add a OTRS pending tag[1] so they don't get deleted in the meantime. FunkMonk (talk) 12:17, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I've added the tag since 4 July. It's more than a month now (which is the max period it should be on for). I checked my email and it seems Matar sent an email to OTRS (I was CCed), but since he was depicted in the images, they asked him to contact the original photographers (which apparently he didn't do yet). I think he owns the copyright of the lead image since it looks like he payed a studio to take it for him, but as far as I know he didn't tell that to the OTRS team. Anyway, I've emailed Matar asking him to provide new images and/or get the permission for others. Mohamed CJ (talk) 13:33, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

" In 2010, he scored a massive win" Scored a massive win sounds a bit informal when it comes to politics, could it be rephrased?

Rephrased to "won with a large margin".

I think "background" would make more sense as a title than "context".

Changed.

"On 28 April, an episode with a footage" This s confusingly phrased. An episode of what?

An episode of confessions. Bahrain TV ran a series of episodes that were like public trials; activists were being named and shamed with all sorts of accusations and after the program they would get arrested. See [2] and for Saqer's part see [3]. I've clarified it in the article.

"Saqer had died in early April while in detention" Likewise confusing, does this mean he had died before the allegations were made public, or how?

Yes, this is what HRW is saying. He died on 9 April with clear torture marks[4] and the allegations (Saqer's forced confessions) were made public on 28 April[5]. The government only acknowledged that Saqer had died due to torture in 23 November when they accepted the BICI report.

Could this be clarified then? Was a bit hard to understand from the article. FunkMonk (talk) 12:17, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Also, Mr. K. Tapo" Full name?

Done.

The article simply states Al Wefaq "is Shia", but in what sense? Because it simply represent Shias, or does it have a religious nature?

Religion or sect based societies are not allowed in Bahrain (or at least that's the law). Al Wefaq members are mostly (if not all) Shia and they represent much of the Shia community. The religious cover of the society is undeniable as well. Sources usually refer to Al Wefaq as a "Shiite movement"[6].

Ok, I don't think that needs to be elaborated on in the article, but I think outsiders might think "Shia party" would refer to something like Lebanese Hezbollah, which is deeply religious, but this seems more like Lebanese Amal or similar, where the members simply are Shia, but not necessarily defined by this. FunkMonk (talk) 12:17, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

The sources are appropriate, and I'm impressed that the general tone comes off as quite neutral.

Thanks :) Mohamed CJ (talk) 09:22, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I have tried to clarify some issues (episode is an ambiguous term, for example), tell me what you think, and then I think this article is quite close to being ready. FunkMonk (talk) 12:23, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Your edits are appropriate. Mohamed CJ (talk) 13:33, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Alright, it is a shame the images are not cleared yet, but that won't hold the article back. Passed! FunkMonk (talk) 13:38, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you very much for your review :) If you are interested in Bahraini articles, I've got two other GA nominations: Abdul Amir al-Jamri and his son Mansoor al-Jamri. Mohamed CJ (talk) 14:26, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I'll probably get around to it if no one else does, but I think it might be seen as problematic if one reviewer passes many article in one controversial field. Could be interesting if you decide to nominate Abdulhadi al-Khawaja, since he is a Danish citizen, and I live in Denmark as well. It is extremely hypocritical that the Danish government generally keeps silent about him, since they don't want to hurt business deals in the Gulf. FunkMonk (talk) 14:36, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Alright. I think Al-Khawaja's article needs some work before nomination, but I'll probably get to it. Mohamed CJ (talk) 15:16, 12 August 2013 (UTC)[reply]