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Talk:Mary's Club/GA1

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GA Review

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.
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Reviewer: Seattle (talk · contribs) 22:36, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]

  • No DAB links, no dead links, though several links are described as "expiring" [1]
  • Files check out
  • Portland then had an anti-pinball ordinance that was being contested in court. Do we know the outcome?
I did not write this section, but to me the text implies that pinball was not allowed back then, but is today. I found this, which is heavy on the legal lingo. In my opinion, it is most important to focus attention on how the venue has been mentioned in the press, and less on the legalities of pinball machine in the city or state. That type of info belong on another article, in my opinion. --Another Believer (Talk) 23:07, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Can "pasties" be linked in the lead and body?
Done. --Another Believer (Talk) 22:45, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Can "Oregonian" be linked anywhere?
Done. --Another Believer (Talk) 22:46, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • Vicki had managed the business for the twenty-five years leading to her father's death some ambiguity here, I first interpreted the sentence to mean that her managing the club led to her father's death, unless that's what the text means.
I think "leading up to" would be better, but I went ahead and changed the text to: "Vicki had managed the business for the twenty-five years prior to her father's death". --Another Believer (Talk) 22:48, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • such as the Orient what is "the Orient"? can you link?
Done. --Another Believer (Talk) 22:48, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]
Done. --Another Believer (Talk) 22:50, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your time and assistance. --Another Believer (Talk) 23:18, 24 May 2014 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.