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Talk:Marouane Chamakh/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman Operation Big Bear 02:40, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Their are just a few issues that need to be dealt with mainly grammar but overall this article is really good.

Grammar:
Lead: which includes the 2004 edition where Morocco → including the 2004 tournament in which Morocco Adam4267 (talk) 20:28, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Bordeuax first para: replace the words courted and inserted. Adam4267 (talk) 00:36, 18 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Bordeaux second para: replace the word fall. Adam4267 (talk) 17:09, 18 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Bordeux third para: line 3 back-to-back weeks is ambiguous, was it back to back matches? Adam4267 (talk) 20:28, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

over a decade ago → over a decade before Adam4267 (talk) 20:28, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

In the match against the former club, Chamakh scored both of his goals within a minute of each other. He was later ejected from the match after committing a red card offense. Adam4267 (talk) 20:28, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I have taken care of all these issues around the time they were posted. Any other issues? –J10S Talk 20:45, 21 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

More grammar issues to come

Main problems:
It is not specified if his transfer was a bosman or not if so please insert. The words bosman or end of contract need to be in there Adam4267 (talk) 00:36, 18 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

This page does not seem completely stable I would suggest semi-protection. Adam4267 (talk) 00:38, 18 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Cites neeeded in lead, end of 2nd and 3rd para. Adam4267 (talk) 17:09, 18 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Any progress on this review? Spiderone 23:23, 2 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
I'll take over in a couple days if there's no progress. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 01:43, 9 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Prompted him yesterday, hasn't been on yet. KnowIG (talk) 20:01, 13 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Ok. I'll give him until the 18th to wrap up what's needed to see if he'll get back on, if he doesn't get on then I'm taking over. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 16:09, 14 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Taking over due to reviewer inactivity; will post my comments within a day. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 02:40, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Here are the issues I found:

  • RTL links to a disambiguation page currently; have it link to the right article.
Done. –J10S Talk 07:19, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • Refs #1 (la fiche de) and #69 (joueur des lions) are deadlinks.
Fixed both references. –J10S Talk 07:19, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "he often waits table" tables
Done. –J10S Talk 07:19, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "While at Nérac, he was equally adept on the field and off and earned good grades in school. "noted in the personal life section, so not really needed here.
Done. –J10S Talk 07:19, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Review in progress, will read+review second half of article tomorrow. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 05:06, 27 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Here are the rest of the issues:

  • "Chamakh was used as a target man and scored a career-low four goals, since becoming a professional in the league." tweak needed. maybe 'and scored four goals, his lowest since..' or just take out that last part of the sentence.
Done. –J10S Talk 04:42, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The previous record was held by Thierry Henry, who scored a goal after 58 seconds for Arsenal against Reading on 22 October 2006." should be cited
Done. –J10S Talk 04:42, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "On 15 February 2011, Chamakh admitted that he felt burnt out stating "By the start of January I felt that I had completely lost my edge". " cite needed
Done. –J10S Talk 04:42, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Chamakh is a Moroccan international at senior level." at the senior level.
Done. –J10S Talk 04:42, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "However, the match finished 2–2 meaning Morocco only had the satisfaction of qualifying for the 2006 Africa Cup of Nations" reword, 'had the satisfaction of' doesn't sound encyclopedic
Done. –J10S Talk 04:42, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'll put the article on hold, and once these issues are fixed I'll pass the article. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 04:18, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Everything looks good now, so I'll pass the article as a GA. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 14:55, 28 March 2011 (UTC)[reply]

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