Talk:Mark Scheifele/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 15:33, 13 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Shall review this for the GAN March 2021 Backlog Drive. MWright96 (talk) 15:33, 13 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Lead

Canadian should probably be not linked per MOS:OVERLINK Done
"He was selected by the Jets in the first round, seventh overall, of the 2011 NHL Entry Draft, the Jets' first draft pick after relocating from Atlanta." - repetition of "Jets"
- Changed to teams', is that OK?
Perphaps added a little more about Scheifele's NHL career?
Wikilink minor hockey to the appropriate article Done
Kitchener, Ontario should also be wikilinked Done

Early life

Think there should be a mention of Scheifele being the youngest of three sibilings as mentioned in the "EAT. SLEEP. HOCKEY" Sportsnet reference Done
Wikilink gridiron to Gridiron football Done
"His father played gridiron in high school and Brad’s brother, Greg, played four years at the University of Guelph." - repetition of "played" Done

Amateur

"Scheifele said he wore 55 because he" - there are some words missing between "wore" and "55" Done
"and ranked third on the team in scoring." - the Barrie Colts say he was second in scoring early in the season not third Done
"He was subsequently invited to the CHL/NHL Top Prospects Game." - when was the game held and where was it held? Done

Professional

Wikilinks to exhibition game and entry-level contract might be of a benefit to non-hockey readers Done
Links for goal, assist and point to the relevant articles would benefit those who do not understand those terms Done
"he was re-assigned to the OHL and rejoined the Barrie Colts." - why was Scheifele reassigned to play in the OHL? Done
"he was called-up by the Jets" - "called-up" is not hyphenated Done
"Scheifele participated in the Jets' training camp ahead of the 2012–13 season," - needs a reliable citation to verify because it is not mentioned in the NHL source at the end of the paragraph this portion of text is a part of Done
"During the Ontario Hockey League playoffs," - think the Ontario Hockey League should be in parentheses not its full name Done
"from the London Knights' Josh Anderson" - this might need a little rewording since the wording is close to the Yahoo! source verifying it Done
"During the 2014–15 offseason, Scheifele used DNA testing to bulk up" - what does it mean to bulk up? To increase his muscle mass? Done
"he arrived at the Jets' training camp 11 pounds heavier than the previous season." - the {{convert}} will need to be used on the text in bold Done
Face offs can be wikilinked to help non-Hockey readers Done
"he scored his first NHL hat-trick in a game against the Montreal Canadiens on March 5, 2016, thus ending the teams' three-game losing streak." - repetition of "game" Done
"Scheifele signed an eight year," - a hyphen is missing between "eight" and "year" Done
"At the time, the current captain Blake Wheeler has two years left in his contract." - Wheeler had two years Done
"Scheifele recorded 60 points in 60 games despite missing a total 22 games due to injuries." - repetition of "games" Done
"to discuss food theory and write up a meal plan." - this portion of text is too close to the ESPN, so it will need Done
Wikilink high sticked to High-sticking for non-hockey readers Done
"Scheifele rejoined the team for the 2019–20 season which was unexpectedly paused due to COVID-19." - Am aware this is factually correct, but it will need to be verified by a reliable source Done
"At the time of his selection, he leads" - past tense; led Done
"Scheifele said he holds no ill will against Tkachuk and didn't believe he intended to injure him." - no contractions please, per MOS:CONTRACTION Done
"On June 2, 2021, against the Montreal Canadiens for the first game of the second round of the playoffs, he hits an extremely dangerous check on Jake Evans in the last minute of the third period as the Montreal's foward has just scored in an empty net."

International play

"where he won gold" - won the gold medal. Done
"In 2019, Scheifele announced his decision to skip the tournament after the Jets were eliminated from the Stanley Cup playoffs." - what tournament are we referring to? Done

Personal life

"a charity that aims to remove the financial barriers to playing sports," - needs to be verified since I could not find that information in the source that is attached to the end of the sentence this portion of text is a part of Done

References

References 2, 6, 10, 11, 12, 13, 64, 66 should not all be in capital letters per MOS:ALLCAPS Done
Reference 18 "Jets skate to victory in return to Winnipeg" should include Associated Press as the agency Done
url-access=subscription fields are missing in References 21, 22, 63, 67 Done
References 23, 27, 37, 44, 62 are missing The Canadian Press as the agency Done
Reference 77 "FRIESEN: Jets' Scheifele takes on the chef in food fight, Round 2". - Freisen doesn't need to be in all capital letters Done

Will put the review on hold to allow the nominator to address or query the points raised above MWright96 (talk) 19:23, 13 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

MWright96, Thank you for this in-depth review. I always appreciate your comments. I believe I have fixed everything. HickoryOughtShirt?4 (talk) 13:51, 15 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@HickoryOughtShirt?4: Now promoting to GA class MWright96 (talk) 16:24, 15 March 2021 (UTC)[reply]