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Talk:Mamie Shields Pyle/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 16:30, 3 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:30, 3 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  • External links OK, no DABs
  • Image appropriately licensed. You don't need to give the newspaper it came from in the caption; just the name and date will do.
  • Link women's suffrage, Citizenship Amendment, League of Women's Voters (and fix capitalization) in the lede. Fix the chronology, and don't use women's suffrage in such close proximity so many times. Is the SD Universal Franchise League notable? If so link it. A redlink would be fine.
  • Put a comma between Huron and South Dakota
  • Don't use John L. Pyle so many times in close conjuction. Pronouns or "her husband" would work just fine.
  • No need to put Universal Franchise League in parentheses to show that you're using a shorter version, it's pretty obvious that that's what it must be. Alternatively, fully abbreviate it in parentheses in the lede.
  • Is there an article for Gladys?--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 22:02, 16 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]

This isn't on hold yet, but I've gone ahead and made some change based on the comments above.

  • Links ok
  • Links added. I separated the first paragraph to make it clear that I started with what she is most known for, then discussed suffrage, then discussed other activities. It was not intended to be chronological. Any suggestions for what else to use instead of women's suffrage? In a paragraph about women's suffrage, it's hard to avoid while maintaining clarity.
  • Done
  • I removed one of the uses of "John L. Pyle" (full name used to avoid confusion with son John Shields)
  • Yes, the article for Gladys is linked in Early career and marriage. I added a link later in the article in case that is why the question was asked.

Knope7 (talk) 03:19, 28 January 2020 (UTC)[reply]