Talk:Low Lights/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 18:24, 7 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

after meeting West. West shared a snippet of the song on Saturday Night Live the day → two clipped sentences; unite as follows: "...West, with the latter sharing a snippet..:"
It is worth mentioning all people that wrote and produced the track in the first paragraph
The song is a gospel track that looks at spirituality and references God throughout. It was released as the sixth track on The Life of Pablo and leads into "Highlights". → A gospel track that looks at spirituality and references God throughout, it is the sixth track on The Life of Pablo and leads into "Highlights".
Say something about the song's critical reception

Done for all, just a question: does the writers reference look good?

I will edit on that after everything else had been adressed. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:35, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox

The "Recorded" parametre isn't cited or mentioned in the article's body. It should either removed or sourced.

Done

Background

Again, also mention the songwriters

Why do I need to?

If you mention something in the lead, you'll also have to mention in in the article's body. That's just how it's done and how every other article does it. Plus it doesn't make any sense mentioning the producers but not the songwriters. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:38, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Done

stating "A bunch of different people → stating: "A bunch of different people
worked on his new album for three consecutive weeks → "new" is a peculiar choice here since the album isn't new anymore; remove it
He discovered → who is "he" here? If it's West, then write "the rapper"
He included the word in the titles of the album tracks "Ultralight Beam" and "Highlights" as well as "Low Lights" → It further makes appearance on The Life of Pablo songs "Ultralight Beam" and "Highlights"
No need for a two-line paragraph; just unite both

Well the two paragraphs are entirely different background info; one is why DJDS worked on this, the other is explaining the title. It is common in situations like this to have two paras.

Both paragraphs are about the background of the song, thus they can be united. Plus such short paragraphs look awful on big monitors. A GA is not always about the written text and reliability, but also about the aesthetic. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:38, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Done Done for the rest

Composition and production

The song contains a sample of the → It...
which goes over piano chords → which is layered over piano chords
production from West, DJDS and Mike Dean → we already know who made the production, no need to repeat yourself
the refs that follow are not in numerical order
[7][8][9] that is numerical order???
West has no vocals on the song whatsoever → West does not contribute with vocals on the song
Within "Low Lights", Rivera preaches → Throughout "Low Lights",...
Rivera preaches about God and her connection → I am confused... Who is "she" and why do we use female pronous out of the sudden? Isn't Sandy Rivera a male?
as the religious themes found throughout his career → as to the religious themes found throughout his career
with such themes being included on The Life of Pablo and the message speaks to the spirituality which helps people stay strong during their lives → this part of the sentence should be removed since it talks more about the album than the track itself
Disagree, as it explains the bigger picture of the song
"Low Lights" comes straight before "Highlights" on the album, essentially serving as an intro to the track. → "Low Lights" preceeds "Highlights" on The Life of Pablo, serving as an intro to the track
Again, no need for a two-line paragraph
The second para gives information on the transition that is relevant to comp, while the first is all about "Low Lights"
The image is so unnecessary at this point and should be removed
Good article criteria says illustrated by media where necessary. The image is not unnecessary as West's involvement with comp is referenced in the section though he doesn't rap or sing on the track.
Moved image to a better section

Done for the rest

Release and promotion

say which label the album was released on, and name the song's length so that you have the "Label" and "Length" parametres in the Infobox cited
during his appearance on Saturday Night Live → during his appearance on Saturday Night Live (SNL)
when he told those viewing: "Kanye West dot com right now, Tidal streaming right now," sharing the track list via Twitter → the is unnecessary in this article, since we're not talking about the album; please remove
Well the song was one of the previewed songs on SNL and it wasn't released as a single or anything so this is notable in the context.

But still that quote should be removed. It's superfluous as the fact that it was made avavilable for purchase suffices. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:40, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Done

The song was one of five that West added to it on the day of release and was initially the intro to "Highlights".[6] → Again, unnecessary, plus we already know that the track is the intro to "Highlights"
Removing the "Highlights" info but the rest is not unnecessary as it is about the song almost not being released so is noteworthy
I put Lowlights on my album just thinking about all the moms driving they kids to school then going to work… → "I put Lowlights [sic] on my album just thinking about all the moms driving they kids [sic] to school then going to work…" These are grammatical errors West made during his Tweet; the "sic" signifies that it's an error made by him and not by us

Done for the rest.

Critical reception

In response to the song, Iyana Robertson → that "in response" part can be removed
Combine "Critical reception" and "Commercial performance" into one section named "Reception"
Both sections are of a notable size each so no need to.

I don't see two lines as a notable size tbh. Plus it look awful on big monitors. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:41, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Fine, I'll do so

on the US Billboard Bubbling Under Hot 100 and never appeared on the chart again → on the US Billboard Bubbling Under Hot 100 and lasted for one week
The track debuted at number 134 on the → The track further opened at number 134 on the (for flow)

Done for the rest.

Legacy

On Twitter after The Life of Pablo had been released, a number of users tweeted out about how many of West's best songs have the word "light" in them, referencing the likes of "All of the Lights", "Flashing Lights" and fellow album track "Ultralight Beam" alongside "Low Lights".[4] → This is not really notable and should be removed. We already know that he uses "lights" a lot of times throughout his discography, but the fact that many non-professionals tweeted about this doesn't make the fact any more notable or part of his "legacy"
Well it's not like I cited Twitter as a source; so many users tweeted out that a reliable source in Mic published about it and therefore it does meet the notability criteria.

I did not say that. The fact that he uses "lights" in many songs and the fact that users tweeted about it isn't noteworthy—at least not in this article—and definitely not part of an artist's "legacy". Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:43, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

It links to the song's legacy as it is attracting a noticeable amount of praise on a large website. Differentiates from them merely being titled with light as many are calling them his best.

reviewing the album Kids See Ghosts → reviewing the eponymous album

Done

Credits and personnel

Fine

Charts

Fine

Other things

27.5% is a good score for copyviolation
I'm not too sure if ref #15 is a reliable source
It may not have a Wiki but that doesn't mean it's unreliable.

He seems to be a journalist and has a bachelor degree in film, so I assume he's reliable. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:44, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

All references seem to support the assertions made in this article, as far as I've checked them
No dead links... Congrats!

Outcome

On hold for 7 days — some changes to make and it's ready to go. Good luck with editing; Cartoon network freak (talk) 07:09, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Cartoon network freak I have made multiple changes though not done some as explained above. --Kyle Peake (talk) 08:27, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Kyle Peake I responded to your comments. Cartoon network freak (talk) 10:45, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Cartoon network freak Responded back, resolved all apart from the legacy comment as I've explained above. Kyle Peake (talk) 11:22, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Passing the article. Cartoon network freak (talk) 12:45, 12 June 2019 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.