Talk:Louise Clark
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Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
[edit]
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Maxblamauer. Peer reviewers: Mariejackson18, Bec246, MoMoDa.
Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 00:17, 18 January 2022 (UTC)
Career Section
[edit]Hello,
In the opening of the career section I would recommend writing an additional sentence about CTV. It is written as being one of Canada's top news networks but attributing that fact to a survey or statistics about Canadian broadcasters will provide a more solid idea of where this individual worked for readers. I would also recommend separating the first sentence, so the quote is a part of a new sentence. The quote, while cited, does not tell a reader who is speaking (whether it be an individual or organization). I would suggest including an in-line citation i.e. Jane Doe said, website states, etc. Since the content of the quote includes opinions (ground-breaking, as a term, is sometimes in the eyes of the beholder) it would be beneficial for a reader. Or if one would prefer, paraphrasing the quote with attribution to its originator. I would also recommend separating the career section into two paragraphs, since the content changes from Clark's work at CTV (and her resignation) to her starting her own company.
I noticed that after each citation there is </ref> this occurred on my page a couple of times while I was doing citations, is there meant to be an additional reference after each citation that did not carry over when you moved your article out of your sandbox?
I hope these suggestions are useful for you, good luck with your article =) Bec246 (talk) 21:06, 7 October 2015 (UTC)
Hey there!
I thought you had a great first draft, I would watch the amount of quotes your using as the entire article seems to consist of mostly quotes. Maybe paraphrase a few of your quotes rather than quote everything directly. Also, what your grammar and awkward wording of some sentences. Overall, great start! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Mariejackson18 (talk • contribs) 00:51, 9 October 2015 (UTC)
Peer Review
[edit]Hi there,
I think you had a detailed research about this filmmaker and her career. It will be even better if you organize the career section and re-word some of the sentence because it seems a little crowed to read. It will also be an improvement if there are more information on other sections: early life and education, awards etc. I also searched the error about the citation and helped you fixed it. — Preceding unsigned comment added by MoMoDa (talk • contribs) 03:55, 31 October 2015 (UTC)