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Talk:Let's Fall in Love for the Night/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]
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Reviewer: Kyle Peake (talk · contribs) 05:16, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]


Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed

Will get started on this shortly. --Kyle Peake (talk) 05:16, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox and lead

[edit]
  • Should be single by Finneas since that is his stage name. Keep real name under writer(s) though.
  • Remove streaming since it was only released on digital download.
  • Recording date is unsourced in the body.
  • Only mention Finneas under producer(s) as that is his stage name.
  • Link to the music video in the infobox
  • Add his single chronology to the box, with the preceding and succeeding singles "Luck Pusher" and "Claudia", respectively.
  • "song recorded by American singer-songwriter Finneas O'Connell." → "song by American singer-songwriter Finneas from his debut EP, Blood Harmony (2019)."
  • "as a single on October 19, 2018, and later appeared on his debut EP, Blood Harmony." → "by OYOY as the lead single from the EP on October 19, 2018."
  • Sentence about the lyricism should end this para; move the music video one to the second para instead.
  • "Lyrically, the song is about" → "A pop track, the song's lyrics are about"
  • "Commercially, the song" → "Commercially, "Let's Fall in Love for the Night"" with this sentence beginning the second para
  • "number 17 on the US Billboard Alternative Songs and number 24 on the US Billboard Rock Airplay chart." → "number 17 and 24 on the US Billboard Alternative Songs and Rock Airplay charts, respectively."
  • Add the music video sentence at this point instead.
  • "was uploaded to the singer's" → "was uploaded to Finneas'"
  • Include information in a sentence following on from this about what happens in the video
  • "throughout October 2019 and performed" → "throughout October 2019, with his tour including performances of"
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 17:37, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Background and composition

[edit]
  • Cite Tidal for a source of him producing/writing it
  • "was released on" → "was released for"
  • "by Finneas' record label, OYOY, on" → "through his record label OYOY on"
  • Start second para instead at the point of the pop track sentence; below suggestions will help you understand this stronger!
  • "reflects Finneas' love" replace "love" with a different word at this exact point since it is used twice in the same sentence
  • "he loves pop songs so much and that he doesn’t" → "that he loves pop tracks so much and doesn't"
  • "He only wants to" → "Finneas only wants to"
  • The sentences about the song's inspiration and creation belong directly after the digital download one in this section
  • "was inspired by Finneas' brief encounter he had" → "was inspired by a brief encounter Finneas had"
  • Target Osaka, Japan to Osaka
  • "He tells Billboard" → "He told Billboard in February 2020" so this flows better after the download sentence
  • "He mentions that it" → "Finneas mentioned that it"
  • "He points out that the second verse was created" → "The second verse was revealed by Finneas to have been created"
  • "vocals, it continues" → "vocals, then continues"
  • "traditional song splendor."" → "traditional song splendor"."
  • "and it end with the singer letting" → "At the ending of the song, the singer lets"
  • [7][2] put in numerical order
  • "It instrumentation is" → "Its instrumentation is"
  • Wikilink frog on the part of that word before the plural comes in.
  • "frogs and subtle sounds" → "frogs, and other sounds"
  • "described it as" → "described the song as"
  • ""romantic, sensual" → ""[r]omantic, sensual" since the R is capitalised in the source
  • Are you sure this sentence should be here since this area is discussing the beginning? Maybe move to the end of this section instead...

user:Kyle Peake, What sentence are you talking about? DarklyShadows (talk) 16:18, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  • "Author Maxamillion Polo says" → "Author Maxamillion Polo said"
  • "to gives it the feeling" → "give it the feeling"
  • "Finneas' vocals seem" → "Finneas' vocals within the song seem"
  • "rap" with them saying it has" → "rap", with them saying the vocals have"
 DoneDarklyShadows (talk) 17:39, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Music video

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  • Belongs inbetween Reception and Live performances sections
  • Img requires alt text
  • Change it to mentioning that he begins the video "sitting on a perch"
  • Wikilink Los Angeles
  • "A music video for the song was released" → "The music video for "Let's Fall in Love for the Night" was release to YouTube"
  • "and received it's" → "and simultaneously received its"
  • The MTV broadcasters should not be italicised
  • "and choreographed by Monika Felice Smith.[10][11][12] The video was shot" → "and choreographed by Monika Felice Smith,[10][11][12] while shot"
  • "first starts with Finneas" → "begins with Finneas"
  • "on a rooftop" → "on the rooftop"
  • Wikilink Los Angeles
  • "skyline." "skyline, while the song plays." since otherwise the following sentence seems weird
  • "filming the video" → "filming the visual"
  • "scene where he sits on a little perch where he strums" → "scene, in which he sits on a little perch and strums"
  • "did not even sweat a bit sprinting over there" → "did not even sweat slightly white sprinting"
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 16:31, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Reception

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  • Mention the critical reception before the commercial
  • Sure you can't add more reviews so an overview of the critical response could be added to the lead? You can use reviews of the EP that mention the song by the way...

user: Kyle Peake I couldn't find anymore. DarklyShadows (talk) 16:40, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  • Billboard should be italicised both times and the named charts should be wikilinked to themselves
  • "Insider called the song" → "Callie Ahlgrim from Insider called the song"
  • "and essential song craft."" → "and essential song craft"."
  • "Polo concluded," → "Polo claimed for the latter to be one of"
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 16:40, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@DarklyShadows: You still need to fix the last issue properly, since the comma is not needed after that as it leads directly into speech marks properly in prose without a comma. --Kyle Peake (talk) 06:29, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Kyle Peake: ::: Done

Live performances

[edit]
  • "October 2019 in support" → "October 2019, in support"
  • "of his debut EP Blood Harmony." → "of Blood Harmony."
  • "performed from the EP." → "performed from the EP during the tour."
  • Exp on the Fallon performance from the ref
  • Target Verizon to Verizon Communications
  • Refs 18 and 19 don't need spaces between them or the fullstop
 Done
This section still needs the space between the closing sentence's fullstop and the refs to be removed. --Kyle Peake (talk) 17:14, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

user: Kyle Peake How does this get done? I'm sorry if I keep asking you questions, I am new to all of this. DarklyShadows (talk) 17:31, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@DarklyShadows: No it's fine, that's precisely what I'm here for as a reviewer. All you have to do is press the backspace between where ref 20 is invoked and the full stop of the sentence that the ref is used for, since this will have it directly after the full stop like the ref should be. --Kyle Peake (talk) 19:55, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 22:16, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Charts

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  • Good

Release history

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  • Various → United States
  • Remove streaming, as that is not sourced, and keep solely as Digital download.
 DoneDarklyShadows (talk) 17:36, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

References

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  • Archive all of these using the tool

user:Kyle Peake how can I archive DarklyShadows (talk) 17:24, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

 Done ````
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 18:05, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@DarklyShadows: This still can't pass, since you haven't done the issues properly. The wikilinks should solely be done on the first usages of the websites, with the exception of refs 11 and 12 since they are generated from the chart table. Refs 3, 7, 19 and 20 still need fixes to be made to them

user: Kyle Peake can you tell me how to do this? DarklyShadows (talk) 07:15, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

DarklyShadows Literally all you need to do is edit the publisher/work of refs to how I said above. --Kyle Peake (talk) 07:17, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

user: Kyle Peake I am literally so confused because of the references are out of order DarklyShadows (talk) 17:20, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

DarklyShadows This is understandable due to the refs themselves being mixed up like you are currently; I will re-instate the issues below to ease any confusion. --Kyle Peake (talk) 18:03, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Wikilink to Billboard (magazine) on ref 3, but remove on refs 4 and 7
  • Remove wikilink to MTV on ref 19 as you have already wikilinked to that publisher
  • Ditto for Insider on ref 20

user:Kyle Peake  Done

[edit]
  • Sure you couldn't create this section by linking to this song on MetroLyrics?
 Done DarklyShadows (talk) 18:02, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Final comments and verdict

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User: Kyle Peake I am ::: Done with everything! DarklyShadows (talk) 22:16, 3 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@DarklyShadows: I checked and you haven't done all the required changes, such as "He mentions" not being changed. --Kyle Peake (talk) 05:37, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

user:Kyle Peake ::: Done I think I fixed everything. Let me know if there is anything else. DarklyShadows (talk) 06:00, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

User: Kyle Peake THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! OH MY GOD I'M SO HAPPY!!!DarklyShadows (talk) 19:01, 4 May 2020 (UTC)[reply]

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