Talk:Leon Legge/GA1
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Reviewer: Kosack (talk · contribs) 06:44, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
Picking this one up, review coming as soon as possible. Kosack (talk) 06:44, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
Lead
[edit]- Link captain to Captain (association football).
- Link non-league to non-league football. As you're specifically referring to the Football League in this case, the L should be capitalised also.
- "holding down a job", sounds a bit informal.
- League Two is linked for a second time in the second paragraph.
Early career
[edit]- Link Brentford in the first paragraph.
Brentford
[edit]- Is the EFL Trophy ever referred to as the "League Trophy"? I would suggest using the full "Football League Trophy".
- Done, Football League Trophy is better.--EchetusXe 14:17, 13 August 2020 (UTC)
- "Legge continued to retain his first-team status throughout the 2010–11 season and scored four goals against Exeter City, Tranmere Rovers and Charlton Athletic", no obvious source for this?
- Same potential issue with the League Trophy title again.
- "would progress their way", this sentence reads a little oddly I feel. Even dropping their way would improve it.
Gillingham
[edit]- Link loan to Loan (sports).
- Ref 31 could be moved to the end of the following sentence as it would cover both and the second is currently missing a ref.
- Carlisle United already linked in the previous section.
- "and earning himself a place", the use of himself here could probably be dropped as we already have him immediately before it.
Cambridge United
[edit]- "thumping of Hartlepool United", thumping is too journalistic.
Port Vale
[edit]- "he said that the club in an altogether better place", something missing here.
Honours
[edit]- No ref for the Lewes trophy.
- I removed it as a new source says his stint there was not a success.--EchetusXe 14:17, 13 August 2020 (UTC)
References
[edit]- There are a few references I can't access as they appear to be either dead or moved. Can we try and rescue as many of these as possible?
- Avoid shouting in ref titles, per WP:ALLCAPS. So ref 10 and 14 can be dropped down.
- Not a massive issue, but some refs link BBC Sport and some don't. It's not a requirement, but it would be good to have some consistency.
- Ref 47 uses only BBC compared to rest including Sport.
- Ref 64 has not title or publisher.
- Is the Football Lab a reliable source?
- I've reworded that line.--EchetusXe 14:17, 13 August 2020 (UTC)
A few points I picked out on an initial run through. Placed on hold for now. Kosack (talk) 12:02, 12 August 2020 (UTC)
- I've addressed those points and changed a few things around, added a little bit. Thanks.--EchetusXe 14:17, 13 August 2020 (UTC)
- A couple of minor points from a second look through
- "extend his deal at the club.[41] However he left the club", the double use of club is a little repetitive here.
- "He went on the make enough appearances", doesn't quite work.
- That's probably about it, once these two little things are addressed. Kosack (talk) 18:27, 13 August 2020 (UTC)
- Okay I've addressed those two. Thanks again.--EchetusXe 12:08, 14 August 2020 (UTC)
- Happy to promote. Nice work. Kosack (talk) 06:49, 15 August 2020 (UTC)