Talk:Lemon & Te Aroha
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A fact from Lemon & Te Aroha appeared on Wikipedia's Main Page in the Did you know column on 12 December 2023 (check views). The text of the entry was as follows:
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Did you know nomination
[edit]- The following is an archived discussion of the DYK nomination of the article below. Please do not modify this page. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page (such as this nomination's talk page, the article's talk page or Wikipedia talk:Did you know), unless there is consensus to re-open the discussion at this page. No further edits should be made to this page.
The result was: promoted by Bruxton talk 22:28, 3 December 2023 (UTC)
- ... that New Zealand's Lemon & Te Aroha was created 19 years before the similarly named Lemon & Paeroa? Source: https://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/food-drink/300622837/in-a-fizz--lemon-and-te-aroha-back-to-reclaim-its-soda-crown
Created by Panamitsu (talk). Self-nominated at 08:45, 31 October 2023 (UTC). Post-promotion hook changes for this nom will be logged at Template talk:Did you know nominations/Lemon & Te Aroha; consider watching this nomination, if it is successful, until the hook appears on the Main Page.
General: Article is new enough and long enough |
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Policy compliance:
- Adequate sourcing:
- Neutral: - Article is tagged with an {{advert}} template
- Free of copyright violations, plagiarism, and close paraphrasing:
Hook: Hook has been verified by provided inline citation |
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QPQ: Done. |
Overall: Not being from New Zealand, I don't know how iconic L&P is, but it sounds like it's a popular drink there. Perhaps for non-NZ readers, it might be helpful to add "better known" or "more famous" to the blurb. "... that New Zealand's Lemon & Te Aroha was created 19 years before the similarly named and more famous Lemon & Paeroa?" Smurrayinchester 16:38, 26 November 2023 (UTC)
- The editor who placed the advert tag has removed it since the issues have been resolved. Schwede66 17:17, 29 November 2023 (UTC)
- Yes I think that new hook is much better for people unfamiliar with the subject. —Panamitsu (talk) 21:47, 30 November 2023 (UTC)
Advertisement
[edit]MicrobiologyMarcus, you've added a maintenance tag saying that this article is written like an advertisement. I've had a read through the article but am unsure what you're referring to. Could you point these out so I can fix them? —Panamitsu (talk) 00:08, 1 November 2023 (UTC)
- Hey @Panamitsu: in my opinion, the prose of the article reads like an advertisement. I think "With nostalgia and childhood memories of drinking L&T, he decided to recreate the drink" is a good example of prose that doesn't belong on an encyclopedia. The new version of the drink is made naturally. Filtration systems is used to remove iron and manganese from the water without using chemicals - While this section describes the production process, it employs the term "new version" and emphasizes natural production methods like ad copy. Just because it is cited, doesn't mean it isn't advertising-like prose. Other phrases that read like ad copy are Thousands of people would visit the Te Aroha spring for the water, which was believed to have curative properties and With nostalgia and childhood memories of drinking L&T, he decided to recreate the drink. microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 00:37, 1 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: Oh yup, I see what you mean now. I'm not too sure about
Thousands of people would visit the Te Aroha spring for the water, which was believed to have curative properties
though. I think it was an important part of its history and this happened over 100 years ago and I don't think it is available to the public anymore. —Panamitsu (talk) 00:51, 1 November 2023 (UTC)- @Panamitsu: that's fair, it's totally common to get into a writing mode and not see the forest for the trees. I think the article has potential, it appears to meet WP:NCORP and has an interesting story; it just needs to be written so that the facts are the main part of the article. Thank you for your contribution to the project! microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 00:56, 1 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: I've rewritten the article with the intention of eliminating advertising. Do you think this is good enough to remove the tag? I'm worried about the "thousands of people" part, so it'd be nice to have your input. —Panamitsu (talk) 21:29, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- Hey @Panamitsu: article looks better, but confused by this sentance Revell was approached about buying the spring's land, so he did. Did what? microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 21:35, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: He bought the land. I'll make it more clear. —Panamitsu (talk) 21:37, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- Oh, he was approached by others at their suggestion to buy land owned by a third party? At the time of writing, it sounds like Revell owned the land, then was approached by another party so that they would be able to purchase the land from him. microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 21:39, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- Oh yes I completely overlooked that. Thanks for letting me know! —Panamitsu (talk) 21:40, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- Oh, he was approached by others at their suggestion to buy land owned by a third party? At the time of writing, it sounds like Revell owned the land, then was approached by another party so that they would be able to purchase the land from him. microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 21:39, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: He bought the land. I'll make it more clear. —Panamitsu (talk) 21:37, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- Hey @Panamitsu: article looks better, but confused by this sentance Revell was approached about buying the spring's land, so he did. Did what? microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 21:35, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: I've rewritten the article with the intention of eliminating advertising. Do you think this is good enough to remove the tag? I'm worried about the "thousands of people" part, so it'd be nice to have your input. —Panamitsu (talk) 21:29, 28 November 2023 (UTC)
- @Panamitsu: that's fair, it's totally common to get into a writing mode and not see the forest for the trees. I think the article has potential, it appears to meet WP:NCORP and has an interesting story; it just needs to be written so that the facts are the main part of the article. Thank you for your contribution to the project! microbiologyMarcus (petri dish•growths) 00:56, 1 November 2023 (UTC)
- @MicrobiologyMarcus: Oh yup, I see what you mean now. I'm not too sure about
Did it really start in 1888?
[edit]Papers Past items in the 1880s advertise Te Aroha Mineral Water and from 1894 there's an ad saying you can drink it "alone or mixed with a little Wine, Spirit, lime or Lemon Juice" but the first reference I can find of Lemon & Te Aroha/Te Aroha & Lemon as a particular product is from 1931. It would be good to find a better source than one person quoted in a Stuff article. Wainuiomartian (talk) 02:58, 12 December 2023 (UTC)
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