Talk:Kyle Dubas/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Kosack (talk · contribs) 14:17, 2 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I'll pick this one up, will post review as soon as possible. Kosack (talk) 14:17, 2 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Initial review

Lead

I'd link General manager here and in the infobox. It's not a widely used term outside the U.S.
Link agent to Sports agent.
"eventually ending up as their general manager", ending up is a little informal. Being appointed, perhaps?
"behind Arizona Coyotes general manager John Chayka", probably don't need to repeat GM here.

Early life and education

"His father was a Greyhounds intern", is this the same Greyhounds team mentioned later in the sentence? If so, the link should be moved here.

Player agent

Link agent again for the first main text mention here.

Junior hockey

Add an abbreviation in brackets (GM) after the first use of general manager so that the term is explained for future use.
"In this position, he hired Sheldon Keefe as head coach", the last position mentioned before this is as a dressing room attendant. Perhaps start with "As general manager..." to avoid confusion.

National Hockey League

"introduced blinded reviews", what are these?
"in terms of what where your organization can go", I think it's safe to assume the what is a typo. There are refs which don't include it [1] [2]
"During the 2018–2019 season" > 2018-19?

Personal life

As this is a new section, I'd start with Dubas rather than "His".

References

Refs 3 and 8 are formatted manually rather than using a ref template. There's not much technically wrong with this but it's displaying the authors incorrectly. They both need an accessdate date as well.
Avoid shouting in ref titles like in ref 7, per WP:ALLCAPS.

Nothing major to worry about, a nice article overall. A few minor points to look at, placed on hold for now. Kosack (talk) 19:31, 2 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Response

Thanks so much for the review. I had no issues making most of these changes, and they were mostly straightforward. In the National Hockey League section - I expanded the "blinded reviews" section - please check if that is understandable, and then for the third bullet point in this section of your review - I am not sure I understand what you mean? Happy to make adjustments, just not sure what!

For refs 3 and 8, the links were redirects to the newspapers main page, so I replaced them both. Please let me know if there is anything else I missed! Canada Hky (talk) 18:12, 3 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Apologies, I should have explained that third point more. I think the norm for mentioning seasons would be for the four-two digit format (2018–19), like you use just before this, rather than full years (2018–2019). Kosack (talk) 18:18, 3 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Ahh, yes - that makes sense, and I fixed it. Thanks for the clarification! Canada Hky (talk) 19:17, 3 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

No worries, I think that's it from me. I'm happy this covers all the bases required of a GA class article. Happy to promote. Kosack (talk) 19:32, 4 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]