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Talk:Končar-class missile boat/GA1

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Reviewer: Sturmvogel 66 (talk · contribs) 16:00, 18 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]


I'll get to this shortly.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 16:00, 18 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

  • No DABs, external links good.
  • Image appropriately licensed.
  • When talking about the class without specifying that they're missile boats, you don't use a hyphen. Forex Koncar-class missile boat is correct and so is Koncar class.
  • Add a hyphen for six strong in the description section.
  • completed at the Tito's Kraljevica Shipyard If they were completed at this shipyard, this implies that they were started somewhere else. The beginning of 2nd sentence of the lede is too detailed and that info should be saved for the main body. I'd delete the entire introductory clause and start the second sentence:"The boats featured..." I'd also delete the naming of the boats in the lede and move the six-strong bit to the first sentence.
  • the Tito's Kraljevica Shipyard What does this mean? The Tito is a place, a shipbuilder, what?
  • Don't capitalize Forces in Croatian Forces, you're not naming a specific unit or service, so it's not a proper noun.
  • Rather than have your ship overview as a table on the side you might consider reformatting it in a section between the description and service sections. See Charodeika-class monitor for an example. Consider citing just the header if all the cells in the column use the same source. Regardless, pennant numbers and fates all need to be cited. I think that I forgot to check on the Silba-class ships so you might want to do the same there if it's not already cited. Redoing the table is your choice, but the cites do need to be added.
  • What do you mean improper ammo? The wrong ammo or did the ammo fail to function properly?
  • You need to explain how and when Sibenik got RBS-15s missiles instead of the P-20s.
  • I'll do a another pass once you've taken care of these issues.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 04:00, 26 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Tito's Kraljevica Shipyard" was the name of the shipyard built the boats. The name was used during SFR Yugoslavia in honor of Josip Broz Tito who worked there during the 1920s, a common practice in the former Yugoslavia-
  • I like the idea with the tables so implemented it. If you think the colors are too much, I can remove them. I used them as a clear way of distinguishing the ships that are still operational and those that are not.
  • Regarding the ammo, "improper" meant that they used regular rounds because they didn't have any armor piercing ammo at their disposal. The sentence before that one says that the only gun that was in position to open fire on the missile boat "lacked armor-piercing ammunition". I've changed the two sentences so they make more sense now.
  • I made other changed so if you would please have a second look at the article. Thank you for the review.--Saxum (talk) 13:52, 27 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]