Talk:Keiji Nishioka/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Gerald Waldo Luis (talk · contribs) 17:37, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

As part of handling the Agriculture, food, and drink part of the GA nomination, I will be reviewing this article. Note that my time zone is UTC+7. Gerald WL 17:37, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

Link Dasho. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Not needed. I've linked it in the infobox. I've deliberately left out linking it in his name, in the style of all articles I've seen for British knights - see Winston Churchill and M. Visvesvaraya. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, appreciate the bolding. I was about to point out articles like David Attenborough. Gerald WL 08:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@Gerald Waldo Luis: As I clean up the prose section by section, could you check the other aspects in GA Review? OR, COPYVIO, RS, image use, stability etc. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, images are appropriate, article has stable recent history, no ORs, all sources are great, and no copyright violations. I would note, though, that some statements have two citations supporting it-- I suggest relocating to the specific claim(s) it supports if that is appropriate. Gerald WL 11:53, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Don't think that's needed. I went through those again, in every instance, they only support the line immediately preceding them. So no problem there. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:47, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, in "Awards and titles," the first sentence is supported by three citations. Did a check, and apparently citation 10 is already enough to support the whole sentence, per quote: In 1980, His Majesty the fourth Druk Gyalpo awarded the red-scarf and conferred the title of Dasho to him in recognition of his selfless and dedicated services to the people of Bhutan in the field of agriculture development. Suggest removing 8 and 9. Gerald WL 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done, Gerald. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 16:18, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link Japanese government. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link Bhutan. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

It was already done. Just look, Kingdom of Bhutan is indeed linked. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link agriculture. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Unitalicize the "s" in "dzongkhags," and link dzongkhag. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Suggest combining para 1 and 2, no need to give line break. Gerald WL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. @Gerald Waldo Luis: please proceed. Regards, Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Early life

Suggest adding ", South Korea" after "Seoul" following many other biographies. Gerald WL 08:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Same with "Osaka"-- have ", Japan". Gerald WL 08:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Added Japanese Korea instead, as the country was not partitioned into North/South at the time. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link agriculture. Gerald WL 08:25, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

See below

Life in Bhutan

"one of Nishioka's professors at the University in Osaka"-- if this is not referring to University of Osaka, I suggest decapitalizing "University." Gerald WL 08:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Changed to the unambiguous term Osaka Prefecture University. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link Bhutan. Gerald WL 08:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Link Agriculture in Bhutan at "its agricultural sector." Gerald WL 08:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Don't think that's needed. All of agriculture, Bhutan and Agriculture in Bhutan are already linked in the lead. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Zhemgang

New words "Panbang" and "Kheng." If there's an article on them, suggest linking. Gerald WL 12:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Panbang linked, Kheng (the region) doesn't have an article. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 13:02, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"converted from forest"-- maybe "converted from a forest"? Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Not needed. It's generic forest that's being referenced, not a particular one. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link wetland and paddy field. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Tweaked that sentence a bit, saying both 'cultivated wetland' and 'paddy field' in a sentence is redundant. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link Fourth five-year plan of Bhutan. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"creating Sonamthang village"-- suggest "creating the Sonamthang village for more natural reading flow. Ignore if simply Sonamthang is preferred linguistically. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Tweaked the sentence. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

If the list of villages have a link (or interwiki link if you can), perhaps link them. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

No wikilinks found, sorry. Not even for Sonamthang. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link cash crop. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Is it "foodgrains" or does it require a space? Cause there's food grain. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Both forms are fine. I've left it as it is, as in my experience, I've always seen it as a single word. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link suspension bridges. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Awards and titles

Link civilian award. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Can't. The page that civilian award links to is ridiculous. Bhutan doesn't have its own page for its awards either. Linked 'civilian' instead. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Death

Forgive me if I don't know anything, but what do you mean by "He was survived"? I've seen this statement in other articles as well and am confused. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The term is he was survived by. https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/be_survived_by explains it. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, thanks for linking the Wiktionary. All these times reading bios I'm like What? This f***bag is resurrected? Gerald WL 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lol, understandable. You see, the dead guy isn't the one doing the surviving, it's his relatives. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:54, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Link state funeral. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Legacy and commemoration

Link sahib. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

"it is known as the Nishioka zam"-- perhaps clarify what "Nishioka zam" meant-- suggest having a footnote with the translated meaning, or some other way. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Kinda done. I don't have any formal sources I can add in the article, but from context and from here, zam seems to mean 'bridge'. I've included the translation in the prose. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

If relevant, link Bhutan-Japan relations at "cooperation between Japan and Bhutan." Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done, I added it in a new 'See also' section. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, the see also section is kinda vague. The two can be linked right at the body, at "its agricultural sector" and "bilateral relations between Japan and Bhutan" (Life in Bhutan), respectively. Linking at the prose where possible is more space-efficient. Gerald WL 15:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox

Caption reads "Keiji Nishioka in July 1989." In style of other articles, suggest ommiting "Keiji," as the full name is identified at the infobox header. Gerald WL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Gerald Waldo Luis anything else? Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, in "Life in Bhutan", there's "The Prime Minister (Lyonchhen) of Bhutan." Is Lyonchhen the Bhutanese of Prime Minister? If so, suggest italicizing. If no, suggest contextualizing. Gerald WL 15:57, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Italicised. Lyonchhen is indeed the word for 'Prime Minister' in Dzongkha, the Bhutanese national language. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Overall

After all issues above have been addressed, I'll put this up for GA. Gerald WL 14:14, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, and it has passed. Congrats! I love this article being nominated for GA, because its prose (especially the Death section) is short and dynamic, which shows new editors that as long as notability is qualified and you write it with genuinity, even short articles can be a good one, and can even stand out among larger ones. Gerald WL 16:23, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Gerald, thank you! I'm glad that you seem to have had at least as much fun as I did editing about a relatively obscure Japanese botanist who worked in Bhutan and has been dead 28 years. Short-ish articles definitely need more recognition - they can, with the right kind of work, be like the London Beer Flood article, which is an FA. Cheers and best wishes, Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI ^{converse | fings wot i hav dun} 16:31, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Good Article review progress box

Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()

3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()

Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed